Well I was in a situation where I knew who I wanted to be with for the rest of my life.He finally purposed after 9,10yrs ! Then he cheated I don't get it. I decided that I didn't deserve that and left him, but now I have regrets what should I do ? Forgive him ?
but then I think how easy it would be for him to do it again....am I throwing my life away ? Help!
2006-10-18 09:04:19 · 10 answers · asked by five_ftnoinches 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Not at all,you are not throwing your life away just for standing up for yourself and for what you believe in.I am proud of you,most woman would of took it and went on due to being alone,but once a cheater,it seems it becomes a reoccurring thing.You do not need that kind of drama in a soon to be marriage.Count your blessings that you found this information now,then after the wedding.You will not be alone,there is a Mr.Right,your soul mate out there waiting for you as well,which i know that you thought he was the one,but things open our eyes for reasons that are unknown to us,but this reason is to help you see that you would of been made a fool of if you would have proceeded into a marriage of convenience for him.He could of not had an unconditional love to have done what he has done to you.I can't say enough on how sorry i am for your pain and suffering that you must be feeling and going threw,but there will be better days ahead.So focus on what you want now and your goals and go after it.Be happy in all you do,don't never let him see you in any other form,but happy.He will feel that there is a chance and he will feel power over you in the time of this situation.Yes,forgive him,cause we are forgiven by the measurement that we forgive,but move forward in knowing you did nothing wrong and that there is a brighter future awaiting you.Best wishes to you always!
2006-10-18 09:20:23 · answer #1 · answered by twjp1962 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think once a cheater, always a cheater. How do you know he didn't cheat on you all those years? That is just the time you caught him, right? He is not going to voluntarily tell you that he cheated all those years. If it was me, I wouldn't. If he loved you, he wouldn't have hurt you. If you love someone, do you want to hurt them? Would you hurt them? He had a choice. It's all up to you. If you can live with it. Forgive and forget. But when he leaves the house, are you going to think everytime, is he going to go see a woman? That will drive you absolutely mad. Will you ever be able to trust him again? These are the things you need to ask yourself.
2006-10-18 16:10:01 · answer #2 · answered by Xena 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
The first sign was the fact that it took him 9-10 yrs to propose. You will be throwing your life away if you stay with him. Dumping him is the best thing you have done for your emotional health in 10 yrs. Not only can he not commit but he's a cheater on top of it.
2006-10-18 16:09:19 · answer #3 · answered by JustMe 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I hate to say this, but your Grandpa was right, why buy the cow if you are getting the milk for free.
If you don't buy the cow, you can dump it for a new one whenever you want.
If you have already wasted 10 years, and you now know he is a scum, why waste any more time?
Move on!!!
Find a real Man, forget about the immature boys with the cool stuff.
Peace, and good luck!
2006-10-18 16:09:19 · answer #4 · answered by C 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
It all depends on yer view of love i think. is your love unconditional or conditional if unconditional then him cheating is fogivable because u love him unconditionally. But if u love conditionally well then mayb one of those conditions is him not cheating. In wich case do u really love him because we all know love is supposed to be unconditional. And does he love u unconditionally or conditionally do u think he would forgive u??? maybe u dont love him any more than he loves u in wich case i say Split and find someone u can love unconditionally.
2006-10-18 16:19:46 · answer #5 · answered by Vinny 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Ya just start from the begining.
I got married after 6 month of court ship. I know what I want and who I can trust. You went with him for how long?
just start over again.
2006-10-18 16:09:50 · answer #6 · answered by Kenshin 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You can't take him back, he'll just do it again.
Trust me, the same thing happened to me, I asked her to marry me, she said yes then cheated on me after 9yrs.
But I took her back....she did it again.(hurts even more after the second time).
Let him go. Move on. I know it's going to suck, but it's all you can do.
Good luck
2006-10-18 16:15:25 · answer #7 · answered by Dave B 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you should forgive him and ask him why did he cheat and do you think that he is the right one for you
2006-10-18 16:10:46 · answer #8 · answered by lost in the blue 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Just leave him. It is a shame you were fooled for so long. Learn from your lesson and move on.
2006-10-18 16:07:30 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
maybe he got scared and did something stupid... sleep with someone else so you feel vindicated then get back together and work it out...
2006-10-18 16:11:01 · answer #10 · answered by jeep_man129 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋