How many times have you been married and what caused the divorces?

Question

I've been married 1 year - never been divorced.

Answer 1

1 marriage, 0 divorces. 20 years.

I read all the responses above mine, coming in with the hypothesis that people would mostly say the divorces had been the spouse's fault. Of 19 marriages/divorces that I could classify, the author concluded he or she was at fault for the marriage's failing only twice. In one answer, it was basically mutual. The other 16 respondents stated that it was the spouse's fault. In other words 84% of the time, people believed that they were primarily not to blame.

And that's why I think there are so many divorces: lack of insight, unwillingness to admit to one's faults and to therefore strive for self-improvment, and blaming of others for one's own lack of judgment and poor choices.

Edit: I began writing the above before schleichercbob responded, so the results do not include his very unusual case.

Answer 2

i have been married once and i'm getting married for the second time next summer. My first marriage failed as my parents said the only way we could stay under my parents roof (as we'd had a place we were told to leave as it was going up for sale and no where else to go or afford) was if we got married. we were engaged at the time already but weren't planning a wedding for a while so within 6 mths we were married. Wasn't the best relationship but we had 2 gorgeous children from it then there dad made friends with other people and would go out a lot and never be home and then the brick wall emerged where me and kids one side his life the other til after 9 yrs of marriage i asked him to leave as didn't want to be married to him anymore as i 'd been like a single parent for yrs raising our kids in which everyone knew family ,my friends he just wasn't there for us spending money we didn't have and not providing as he should. Was the best thing i ever did as he's now married to a much younger girl with 2 smll children who rules him with a rod of iron but even though i get child support he still doesn't see the children as he should and his new wife has a bee in her bonnet about me even though we split 3 yrs before they got together.

Answer 3

I have been married twice. Once to a man who manipulated and controlled me from the time I was 15 years old. I couldn't wait to get out of my parents house and he was the best alternative. He was 19 at the time. We dated and married three years later. I became pregnant three months after we married. He spent all of our money, never cared for me or our child until it was too late. I was working in a bar at night and an attorneys office during the day. A friend finally asked why I stayed, I of course answered because of my son. He made the simplest statement that made me leave and that was, well if you are working all the time, when do you see your son? I did it the wrong way, but I have made amends and am now remarried to the best man I could have ever dreamed of. He gives me freedom, he allows me to be myself and most of all he respects me! I knew when I walked down the isle to my first husband it was a mistake. But when I took the second trip down that isle, my heart was full of joy and I knew it was the right thing to do.

Answer 4

Been married twice. Divorce for the first one was because I married a pathalogical liar and I did not know him well enough before we got married, otherwise I would have seen his true colors. That was over 12 years ago. Last Septemebr, I married the man I want to grow old with. This marriage is for keeps.

Answer 5

Twice married and twice divorced. I think the reason for the divorces was because both times I got married in Tennessee.

Answer 6

Once. We divorced after 5.5 years together. I was just too young to get married (19 at the time) and I had never lived a life outside of our relationship (started dating at 16)I refused to listen to my mother (always listen to your mother...lol) when she told me it would work. He was (and still is) the most selfish, controlling and verbally abusive man I have ever known. After the verbal turned physical, I took our daughters and left. Now I am dating the MOST WONDERFUL man I could have ever dreamed of and I have finally found happiness in my new life.

Answer 7

Married first husband for 16 years and found out he was having an affair (for the last 5 years of our marriage). He was also a heavy drinker. Finally got out of that marriage and found be a great man who loves me and loves my boys as his own. Hopefully this time will be forever.

Answer 8

One marriage, one divorce. I left him because he became physically abusive to me while I was pregnant with our first child. Later, I found out he was sneaking out at night to go drinking, gambling, and visit topless bars with his friends while I was asleep. When the police got involved, I also discovered that he'd been arrested (also in the middle of the night, while I was home asleep) for supplying alcohol to a group of underage girls at a party. Nice.

Eleven years after my divorce, I'm actually contemplating marriage again - to a much better man. I still have a lot of mixed feelings about it though, because I really don't want another failed marriage in my life.

What's YOUR story?

Answer 9

once and once is enough still married and plan to be for a long time "till death do us part" but if i were to get a divorce i think disrespect to be the cause!!

Answer 10

3 times,Hubby 1. he was a marine and he was very abusive and the military did nothing so i did i got divorce and got it all,hubby 2. He died in a automobile accident. hubby 3, best one i have ever had and am still married to him and he is so very different than any other man i have ever been with .He is very good to me brings me flowers treats me like i am a queen ,his queen .