I resently told my husband that I had cheated on him when we were seperated. I know I did something wrong. I am not dening that. but before the big confestion we ad been trying to have a baby, now of course that isnt something that we are trying for. But lately he has been talking about never having childeren, I for one want a family. I really dont know what to do. Is this a normal reaction? Will it just go away with time. Or do you think he will ever get over it?
2006-10-18 05:38:42 · 12 answers · asked by JOJO 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
He is probably just upset give it some time, If he does'nt come around then u probably think about moving on . Y ou are'nt getting any younger. good luck
2006-10-18 05:45:30 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is a good possiblity he will never get over it. He is hurt, angry and confused. It may come to a point when he will ask you for a divorce. His mixed emotions are making him think about a life with you in the future. He doesn't want kids right now, because he doesn't think it is fair to bring kids into a relationship as it is right now. Which is a good thing. Be prepared, because he may never change the way he is thinking. He may end the marriage as well because he can't forgive you and move on. Sorry, but you have to face the facts. I wish you the best and hope that things will turn out for the better. I'm sorry, but don't think about having children right now. You both have a lot on your plate and a child will not change anything. Plus a child deserves to come into the world into a happy family.
2006-10-18 13:38:48 · answer #2 · answered by older&wiserforit 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No offense, but this is a classic case of female stupidity we all suffer from at times. The important word here is that you were separated and what you did then was non of his business and you should have kept it to yourself. Since you opened your big mouth now all you can do is give him time to either accept it or get over it there is not much you can do. How do you know for sure he wasn't with someone else when you were not together as well and how would you feel.
2006-10-18 12:58:52 · answer #3 · answered by barbie2 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Your infidelity has not only hurt him deeply, but it has also broken the sacred trust married couples have in one another. If your husband wanted kids before he knew, he probably still wants them. The decision he is making is, does he want children with you? You will have to give him time on this one. Spend this time trying to rebuild the trust that has been broken.
2006-10-18 12:47:43 · answer #4 · answered by Bill 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well you cheated on him during a separation... that right there is says you guys need to go yal separate ways.. the fact that you were already separate shows that you were already having problems and now that he knows you cheated, he probably will not be able to trust u. no body ever gets over being cheated on, they may say they do but they really don't and it will always be in the back of his mind
2006-10-18 12:44:02 · answer #5 · answered by Joka H 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just be glad if he's willing to work things out with you. And of course it's gonna take some time for him to get over it- it's not gonna happen over night.
Because you cheated on him, his views of having a family with you are different now. It's up to you to fix what you've done, and only you can help him get over it with time.
2006-10-18 12:45:30 · answer #6 · answered by candy- capped 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He hurt and cant trust you as of now. I wouldnt want to have that glorious gift with someone I dont trust and thats a big thing to gain back espiecally when its a matter of cheating.So youi gota build up his trust again , it might not be easy and itr might take a long time but if youi love him ,you can do it. =)
2006-10-18 12:44:49 · answer #7 · answered by girl 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, he has the right to be disgusted with your behavior but I believe he could either just be saying it out of anger, or honestly mean it.
How does he know you won't cheat on him again and get pregnant with another guys baby and say it's his? He's probably really frustrated and stressed out, constantly thinking of you cheating on him.
I would suggest marriage counseling for the two of you.
2006-10-18 12:42:53 · answer #8 · answered by ♪Msz. Nena♫ 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
You have broke his trust. Having a child with someone that might cheat again is a big step. Rebuild the trust and he might change his mind.
2006-10-18 12:41:16 · answer #9 · answered by middle aged and love it 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, you did something to break his trust in you. If you are not trying for kids now, let it rest. He probably needs some time to come to grips with what you told him.
2006-10-18 12:42:41 · answer #10 · answered by Tiger by the Tail 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋