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My soon to be ex husband is an abusive, liar, cheater and negligent man. I filed for divorce on April 14 so he deicded to get back with an old girlfriend of his so I ask my lawyer if it matters that he is dating someone else he says no and that it is ok if I would want to do the same so I chose to. In July and then my ex finds out and begins sending threatening messages to my boyfriend saying he wants to beat the living stuff out of him. Remember he is doing the same thing also, however I don't bother his girlfriend. He was overseas when this was happening so I informed his LTC and he told my ex that he faces jail time should we press charges. Now what I am wondering is it possible for me to draw up a contract of what i want out of the divorce and set up a visitation schedule for him to see our son that he could either agree to or face the jail time? He has caused so much pain in our lives I just don't want him to think that he is going to get away with doing things everytime he does

2006-10-18 03:47:27 · 5 answers · asked by Nikki 1 in Family & Relationships Marriage & Divorce

something to me becuase he has always gotten away with abusing me my own fault but I believe it is time he faced some consequences for his actions whether it is in jail or by agreeing to a contract I draw up. We live in Kansas if it helps any.

2006-10-18 03:48:31 · update #1

5 answers

That's what your lawyer is for to draw up the terms of your divorce. You cant force him to agree with exactly what you want. Usually there is a little give and take involved until you come to an agreement on it all. Use the threatening messages to your advantage though it should give you pretty good leverage in court. Or press the charges that his LTC warned him about and let him see what its like in prison. It may change his attitude a bit.

2006-10-18 03:57:45 · answer #1 · answered by babygirl_k2001 4 · 0 0

First of all as long as the two of you are still legally married any type of an affair is wrong so for your lawyer to say it was OK and for you to do the same was wrong of him. I'm not sure how that works for a legal separation but I am assuming that is not what you have. And yes by your husband being in the military he could face jail time if it goes through a military court procedure. You can draw up whatever conditions you like as far a the divorce goes but just remember that your husband could always contest it meaning disagree with the stipulations of the decree. Had you not yourself had an affair you may have been able to get the agreement based on his infidelity and a written statement from his commander with whom you had spoken to. He may not have to worry about jail time in the civilian world because it happens so often but military laws are different. I would suggest you consider other attorneys' advice and not just the advice of the one. Also contact a military lawyer to find out the military laws on adultery and ask how that will or will not relate to the civilian world. Good luck!

2006-10-18 04:54:35 · answer #2 · answered by Tanya 2 · 0 0

Just press charges and put his but in jail. The judge will decide the divorce don't try threatening just file what you have to and move on

2006-10-18 03:53:19 · answer #3 · answered by Mitzi 3 · 0 0

Yes, its called a restraining order. They are free from your local police department.

2006-10-18 04:12:55 · answer #4 · answered by gary t 4 · 0 0

that is called blackmail.
your best bet would be to persue the allegations against him now. he will be in jail and you will win custody and won't have to be afraid.

2006-10-18 03:51:56 · answer #5 · answered by nwnativeprincess 6 · 0 0

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