The guy was supposed to be my "best friend". For nine or ten months they had an affair (even in my own bed and my son's bed). I never caught them, she finally told me about it and said she loved me and would never do it again. The guy's got an a** kicking when I see him, but should I trust her?
2006-10-18 00:54:52 · 18 answers · asked by tandl63801 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
I'm sorry to hear your wife has lived a lie for 9 months and only now may have a pang of guilt feelings if any feelings at all. She may have just been dumped by this guy and now wants things her way again, back to normal until she receives a compliment or opportunity with someone else . It's the 9 months thing that gets me , she obviously would still be doing it if something hadn't cropped up to stop it . She has no morals and is a poor role model for your children . I wouldn't blame the ex best friend anymore than your wife. I would divorce her immediately and do your best in whatever way possible to have as much influence as you can with your child. This women is a calculating liar , the worst type . I'm afraid you can only look forward to more of the same from a woman of such loose morals. I am being blunt but I have walked in your shoes in a first marriage like the one you describe . Staying together serves none of you well . Good luck !
2006-10-18 01:14:12 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
What would make her even want another guy is the 1st thing I would ask myself? She is very wrong & I think we all need to learn to forgive but you will never forget & then ask yourself would you ever trust her again. It's hard once you have been taken like that & I recommend you guys get to the bottom of the problem before going any farther in the marriage.
2006-10-18 01:00:33 · answer #2 · answered by "karma" 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ultimately its up to you whether you try to recover your relationship or leave. If you have kids you may want to try and work through it, if not, the easiest thing to do is leave the relationship.
Giving your (ex) best friend a butt kicking will more than likely end up with you facing assault charges. He isn't worth it.
I have been through a double betrayal, my wife and my (ex) best male friend and it sucks bigtime.
Trusting her will take time, a lot of time, but it can be recovered. Best advice is never give anyone "blind" trust. Trust but verify.
2006-10-18 01:04:02 · answer #3 · answered by OleMarbleEyes 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are really the only one that knows whether you'll ever be able to trust her again or not. But I can say that for me, no I wouldn't be able to trust my husband again if he did that to me, especially since it went on for that long. I would always be wondering whether he was cheating on me again. I know that many people have forgiven and contiued on with the relationship but for me it would be an instant deal breaker.
Good luck in whatever you choose to do. You have a rough road ahead of you whatever you choose to do.
2006-10-18 01:04:29 · answer #4 · answered by Troubled 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi dude
if she really loves you and you do love her a lot then there is nothing wrong in your relationship but if you feel that your friend might continue on beds then this leads to divorce or kick your friends ***
2006-10-18 01:05:12 · answer #5 · answered by samp 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If she's that weak, she will fail again. Leave her. If she truly loved you she would not have done it. Where was the love when she was sex in YOUR bed. Does it still smell of the other guy?
You don't deserve that type of treatment.
Cut your losses and move on.
2006-10-18 01:01:57 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You must really love her if u r willing to take her back
but i wouldnt take a cheating spouse back for the world because they eentually cheat again and again dont be moved by her stupid apologies
2006-10-18 01:31:31 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It depends on long you have been married and how you feel about her. Is she willing to go to couples therapy to resolve her issues are you willing to make the effort to work things out these are the questions you need to ask your self
2006-10-18 01:28:33 · answer #8 · answered by nana_viki 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
didn't you know best friends are usually the ones that will stab you in the back first,as for giving her another chance i would tell her not to let the door hit her in the *** on the way out throw her *** out like yesterdays news paper
2006-10-18 01:03:26 · answer #9 · answered by just_me_1955 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Trust is earned. Forgiveness Divine.
She is at level zero for trust right now.
2006-10-18 01:00:43 · answer #10 · answered by justpatagn 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋