help me out....matter of luv??????????

Question

there is this boy who has proposed me ....... first lemme tell abt him....he is an insecure kindda person mayb b'coz of his family n' his past relations...and i have never had a relation b4....
okay now ...initially i said yes to him....i don't know thinking wht....but now i am facing a gr8 problem..........i don't want 2 b involved with anybody b' coz it wud affect not only my academics but many other things..............and my parents !!!! the biggest" "...i don't want them 2 think tht their daughter is doin' such things........... but i feel tht this boy loves me passionately.......wht do i do ..............plzz tell me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
i feel tht i can bring him back to the track and improve him....but then........ these problems.......
n' plzz don't write answers like............."if u luv him then go 4 it or else leave him"........plzz don't write such answers.... i am already confused or whtevewr abt dis........i mean i luv him as a very best frnd of mine.....so WHT TO DO ?????

Answer 1

GO SLOW AND BE FRIENDLY WITH HIM.

Answer 2

What matters most is your happiness more than anything. Even if, the person at the other end is passionate about you, you should think about yourself first. It might sound self-centred but in reality its not.

First, sit down with this boy and have a one on one talk with him and tell him what's on your mind. Tell him to give you some time to complete your education and then, you can go ahead with his proposal (that is, if you still love him). It takes two to make a relationship work and it takes the same two to destroy it.

If your parents disapprove, talk to them as dialogue is the best in every situation of communication. You don't have to please them to marry someone they like because it will be to your own detriment. They won't be there with you and you might end up divorcing later so its best to do what suits you best.

Never and i mean NEVER try to change him or anybody with marriage. Whatever he had before will still continue whether he seems to have changed or not. Its just like an alcoholic, no matter the rehabs and everything, he will still drink. It now depends on whether he now takes a beer a day than the 12 beers he used to take per day.

At the end of the day, its you and only you that will decide.

Answer 3

Take this peice of advice and keep it forever. You will just know when the time is right! Right now you know it is not so withdrawl your yes. This guy is grasping for security and you know what you want, dont give up your life. Stay the path your on and watch what life will bring. Im sure stability and a happy healthy marriage as long as you dont let people talk you into something you clearly arent ready for....Explain to him that really your not ready for a commitment like that and really dont know when you will be. Thats the truth cause when true love comes you will just know hes the one.....Its all about timing, Mr Right will come when the time is right....

Answer 4

Don't. Simple. If you this many doubts now then it will only get worse. Marriage is one of the most difficult things you do in life, so it is very important to do it with the right person. When the right person comes along you won't have these doubts.
Tell him you've changed your mind. That is what an engagement is for, so you can change your mind. It might be hard telling him now, but it's a whole lot harder a day before the wedding.

Answer 5

firstly admit that its your mistake that to said yes to his proposal without thinking if your just flirting then dont bother about this it will soon be ended but you said that you love as a friend if you love him as a friend then think abiut him that if you can mould him into your lover then do keep serious efforts and make your love a sucessful one

you cant satisfy both your love life and your parents wish then you have to choose between them
but be sure that you truly can change your friend or lover what ever and then think of each and every aspect in your life the present one and the future then take a wise decision but dont loose your academics which more important


this issue wont be ended in simple lines which we give , we just give many options from which you have to choose ok anyhow all the best

Answer 6

dear friend,
There is nothin to confuse yourself, you are clubbing all, don't club while pondering for better life, just make seperate and think one by one, what is not important in life, above all whatever you asked in your question, everything is important, like parents, study, love, all diferent types of imp. parts in life to fulfil. love is strongest bridge to marriage life, without bridge you cannot reach the destination, right? so, what you do is convince everyone parents and other side your lover, take your own time, just tell your future plan, parents are your always real lovers they always think positively, and your lover try to convince as much as posible, don't get rid of the relation, otherwise you will be in big trouble, it is very easy to break the relation, but very difficult to rebuild it, so better think positively, all the best friend.

a well wisher
cnu

Answer 7

Why don't u talk personaly to his parents about this problem, may be they may help u to sort out.

There is a big problem in u b'cause u r asking the question as well as giving the answer also.

Don't get confused wait for the time.

Answer 8

Tell him every thing... bcoz
1.first of all tell him what u r thinking about him(i mean best frnd)
2. let him know the what happens next if ur family
comes to know about ur relationship
3.and believe me if he loves u (as u say)
then he will leave u bcoz love is not about getting love in response its all about (sacrifice)

Answer 9

YOUR PROBLEM IS YOU WANT TO EAT THE CAKE AND HAVE IT TOO...AS I CAN SEE YOU ARE AN INTELLIGENT GIRL AND UNDERSTAND YOUR FAMILY VALUES WHICH IS A GOOD THING AND ALSO YOU WANT TO PLAY GOODY AND IMPROVE THIS GUY.....BUT THEN YOU DON'T SIMPLY REALISE THAT YOUR FICKLE MINDEDNESS ABOUT THIS RELATIONSHIP WILL ALL THE MORE INCULCATE A SENSE OF INSECURITY IN THIS FRIEND OF YOURS.....YOU TRY TO TELL HIM YOUR PROBLEM AND ASSURE HIM THAT YOU WILL ALWAYS BE A GOOD FRIEND TO HIM NOTHING LESS NOTHING MORE...IF YOU ARE CONVINCING ENOUGH IN WORDS AND ACTIONS I AM SURE YOUR FRIEND WILL UNDERSTAND..AND AFTER SOME TIME HE WILL SETTLE FOR SOMETHING LESS THAN AN AFFAIR...AND YOUR PROBLEM WILL BE SOLVED...ALSO STICK TO YOUR FAMILY VALUES AND YOUR CONCERN FOR YOUR STUDIES...BECOZ IT IS GOOD THINKING DON'T EVER COMPROMISE ON THIS.. WHAT EVER MAY BE THE COST...

Answer 10

Always do whatever your heart say, My girlfriend has also faced this problem, but now we are together for 5 years. And after sometime we will get married. We both are well stand. First find that he is a right guy for u then take next step

Answer 11

look.....u shud actually giv it a thought..i mean thers a guy who luvs u...so u see whether this person is gud or bad...if u r really interestd ...go ahead .....if u r not...talk to him...u may better, explain all these to your boy-friend. He will understand, if he really loves you.but think first nd then make a decision...or else u will be hurting sumone who really loves u..