Well as the old saying goes, the same things it took to bring you together, are the same things that will keep you together. The honeymoon doesn't stop because you've been married for 15-20+ years. You have to focus on your mate and keep the romance kindled, when you feel like the flame is going out, throw some more wood on the fire. Be commited to keeping things alive!
2006-10-18 00:32:24
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answer #1
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answered by Special K 5
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It can get difficult, but with creativity and communication, the task can be done.
The longer you stay with your spouse and as years move on, there is another aspect to the relationship. A closeness and deeper understanding of one another. A certain comfort level and where your spouse becomes your best friend.
There are ways to ignite the spark. Spontaneous events, candelight dinners, and even some of the small things you do for him can help fuel the fires. But remember, it takes two to keep things exciting!
2006-10-18 01:13:12
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answer #2
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answered by Anonymous
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Love is the answer to everything. Even after many years of marriage, they should still find time to woo and seduce themselves like they did pre-marriage.
They could go for a vacation like a cruise or something to get that romance kicking, then obviously, all the sex positions have been tried but there are still some things that can rev up the engines once again. Buy sex toys( for those who like it), porn, aromatherapy candles and oils, sexy linen sheets, lingerie, have a candlelight dinner every once a month so as not to be too predictable and most importantly, call yourselves during work to say some endearments to each other.
The man should buy his wife a gift every now and then especially one she likes and aches for. He/she could drop love letters or romantic notes in strategic places where the kids won't see it. Have lots of public displays of affection.
The key is never to do the same thing over and over again. If you usually have sex in the bed, go to the kitchen and have it there or the sofa,e.t.c. The list is endless but love is the answer to everything.
2006-10-18 00:26:50
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answer #3
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answered by Banana Pie 3
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You have to reinvent your relationship occasionally. People and circumstance change. You have to recast your roles to suit. That will keep the newness alive which is the spark you are looking for.
The biggest mistake people make is getting comfortable with each other and not realizing that one of you is changing. Commit to accept change not resist it. That commitment will allow you to try new things. Newness IS the spark. That's why people have affairs, lack of newness.
Never quit learning. Never quit looking for new activities and venues. Positive outlook and a quest for continuous improvement keeps your passion alive. Comfort leads to complacency.
2006-10-18 01:40:25
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answer #4
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answered by Flagger 6
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You've have got to realise that love with your partner is mixed up with lust! for the first six months to a year into the relationship. After that comes an 'endearment' which means you are really in love with each other! to 'treasure' someone for twenty or thirty years is true love, that is how couples marriages or defacto relationships last for such a long time! Hope this helps!
2006-10-18 00:27:45
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answer #5
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answered by wheeliebin 6
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Let me first say that this is just my opinion, my marriage is not working well but if I could fix it, I would maybe treat my spouse as well as possible. Take them on a "date" once a week or once a month (depending on money issues). Be attentive to the other, listen (really listen) to what they are saying (or not saying). Without smothering them, give compliments and mean it. Be supportive and let them know they mean everything to you. I hope I've given you what you were looking for. Good luck!
2006-10-18 01:20:27
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answer #6
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answered by ? 6
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ive been married for 5 years.....we have 2 kids aged 3.5 and 20months......we try our hardest to get time alone to just the 2 of us.....little dinners....movies at home...staying at a hotel for the night.....and occassionally going away for a weekend and spoiling ourselves with each other.....you need time alone......
if you have no kids then i would suggest the element of surprise helps to keep that spark.....a candlelit dinner at home....notes on the fridge to each other.....leaving a token like a rose or something in a place that you know your partner will go to first thing in the morning....telling each other "i love you"......marriage is definately something you have to work towards....good luck and hope my ideas are of some help.....
2006-10-18 00:20:50
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answer #7
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answered by askaway 6
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you married the person, the spark is there even if you don't think so......
every morning when you both get up the spark is there, every night when you kiss good night its there and Every time that person enters you mind, the spark is there, some just show it a different way
2006-10-18 00:19:21
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answer #8
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answered by bluelitttt 4
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Keep the spark going in the bedroom is the most important part...
2006-10-18 00:18:50
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answer #9
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answered by fungirl 2
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After 26 years sometimes the flame goes out but there are always the pleasant memories.
2006-10-18 00:16:01
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answer #10
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answered by goodbye 7
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