Well my biological father is currently in prison and is up for parol. He is in jail for trying to kill my family and i. but even after these years i for some very stupid reason i just want to know if he loves me. Hearing it from my step father isnt enough, i just want to know that even after what he has done he for even one day loved me. On fathers day all i can think is if he is thinking of his girls... it tears me apart becasue when i stay at a friends place i hear them say dad can you help me with this and that...but when all i can remember is him pushing me away. do you think i should talk or send a letter to him because no one believes how much it would mean to me to get a letter just saying that he once loved me.....
2006-10-17 22:31:42 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
but i would set up a mail box far away from where i live
2006-10-17 22:39:06 · update #1
if it will help you to move on with your life then you should do it. but remember don't let your fathers inadequacies as a parent destroy your own self-esteem. you are a valid person in your own right who desrves the very best from your life.
2006-10-18 00:04:57 · answer #1 · answered by silly billy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I can understand how you feel. Before you write your father this letter I would becareful. He was put in jail for for trying to kill you and your family. Just because he is in jail does not mean he regrets what he did and that he would not try to do it again. Does he know where you live now have you ever talked to your father at all since he has been put in jail? I think it is very possable you might not like the answer you get if you do ask him. I know how much it would feel to know he once loved you. But if you write him and you get an answer you did not want? I would make sure if you wrote him that you would do it in a way that you can get an answer without giving him a way to hurt you or your family again. All I can say is good luck be careful and I hope you get the answers you want.
2006-10-17 22:45:12 · answer #2 · answered by melthule 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
To satisfy your own curiosity maybe, but don't be surprised if he says he does not love you. That could happen too. Sometimes people change. Sometimes they don't. You have to be prepared to face the consequences of getting involved with that.
To be honest with you what I would do if I were you is let it go and move on with your life.He tried to kill you and your family and pushed you away as a little child. What kind of human being is that? Besides that, he is in jail. How can he help you and develop a relationship with you with him being there and you living your life? Time to move on. I know it's hard but you certainly aren't the only one who has had to deal with no good parents like this. Don't play a victim. Conquer this crap and live your life.
2006-10-17 22:42:33 · answer #3 · answered by Blah Blah Blah 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
try writing everything down you are feeling including the questions you have about why he did what he did. Then make a decision on what you want to do from there. This may give you a little more choice. If he doesn't write back then you have your answer you were just chasing a dream. If he does then you know he still loves you and wants to be in your life
2006-10-18 06:26:42 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The thing to take into consideration is what would happen if he didn't say he loved you, said he never did, or worse yet, said he did to get something from you?
It sounds like you should seek counselling for this because all the other people who love you are not enough.
Think about what contacing this man would mean before you do it as you cannot uncontact him.
Good Luck!
2006-10-17 22:34:53 · answer #5 · answered by Star 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are old enough to visit the prison, I suggest you go there in person and talk to him face to face, then you will get his thinking better. who knows maybe he has come back to his sense or maybe he has something that he has to say to you. You will only stay at peace if you confront that past. get his side of the story for once. then you can move on. everyone makes mistakes, get to him while you still can, or if he dies in prison without you having talked to him, you will live with it for the rest of your life wishing you had given him a chance to talk to you.
2006-10-17 22:39:34 · answer #6 · answered by sweetyp 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why bother? Really?
Lets put it this way: If you go to see him and he tries to kill you again, then its your own fault.
I never had a father growing up, and I didn't need one either. Neither do you. Quit fretting about the nature of your friends' lives and concentrate on your own... as it is now... and the continuation thereof...
... You don't need a father.
2006-10-17 22:34:15 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes i think you should send a letter. You will never deal with all the questions unless you do so. And if you dont get a reply then thats your answer.
2006-10-17 22:34:06 · answer #8 · answered by janetlouise24 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
do what's in yer heart, lass.
yer dad has feelin's, just like ya suspect.
but, he's got troubles, too.
so, don' try to push anythin' too fast.
show 'im yer respect 'im
in what ever little way he still earns it.
it'll help 'im keep tryin' to be a better man.
good luck, gal
2006-10-17 22:36:40 · answer #9 · answered by paddy 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Course you should or you'r never gonna get straight , just do it an live with the consequence's whatever they may be , it's better than living with torment x
2006-10-17 22:36:07 · answer #10 · answered by nicemanvery 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋