My fiance was raped and pregnant, she is not sure what to do with the rapist's child.
2006-10-17 20:34:17 · 14 answers · asked by Go For Broke 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
no point in having a baby out of rape.
the child will suffer the most---- throughout his life ---- without his mistake.
2006-10-17 20:57:33 · answer #1 · answered by Excellent E 2 · 0⤊ 3⤋
If she is not sure what to do with the baby, it doesn't sound like she wants it. I believe adoption would be best. There are so many childless couples who would love to have that baby.
On the other hand, I have a friend who was raped and became pregnant. She kept this child and loves him dearly. She has solely supported this child and he is the center of her life, as well as her family's.
Each case is different. I would recommend that your fiance seek therapy before making any decision.
2006-10-18 05:57:10 · answer #2 · answered by Working Mom 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think that totally depends on whether or not she can look at the child as her child or the product of rape. I know a woman who was raped and had her baby and kept and loved him, thinking of him as hers, not the product of rape. I would suggest that she get counseling either way. Once she makes the decision to let go, it's hard to turn back if you change your mind. And, if she decides she loves this baby and wants to keep it, you will have to stand behind her decision and love the baby as your own, too. Very difficult situation. Good luck.
2006-10-18 03:45:29 · answer #3 · answered by The Nana of Nana's 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Don't keep the child. The child is not a product of an act of love or commitment. He or she will be a permanent reminder of what happened to her, even though its not the child's fault. Its better to let the child grow up somewhere else and best to put it up for adoption.
2006-10-18 03:57:56 · answer #4 · answered by DrSH 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If it was me no, I would not be able to give it up for adoption. That is still her child. You all need to sit down and talk about this because you will be the only father this child will ever know. Can you love it the way it should be loved? I went through a similar thing, only I wasn't sure until after she was born that it was my husbands. He said through out my whole pregnancy "if it's mine, it's mine. If not then it is still mine." Think about that and ask yourself can you say the same thing. This child didn't ask to be conceived this way but it happened. If you all can't love the child the way it needs to be loved then yes, give it to someone who can. Good Luck to you in your time of confusion and sorrow.
2006-10-18 05:36:50 · answer #5 · answered by Dcham81 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
The best revenge upon the rapist would be for her to keep the child and love it even greater than the rapist hated her. Hatred only wins when it is perpetuated. But love wins when we chose to love despite the circumstances.
WK
2006-10-18 04:03:17 · answer #6 · answered by olin1963 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
if i was in this situation,i think i would keep my baby with alot of thinking about this,knowing if i keep the baby then when he or she grows up you have to explain to them that they were a product of rape,you just would have to give the child alot of love thats all because i know someone who was a victim of rape and had a baby and resented her babys life and that child is messed up mentally because of her mother being raped and never letting it go.so just tell your fiance to think about this and the consequences.was your fiance tramautized by this i know she was.so i feel if she can get help to heal from this then should could,think about it and goodluck.
2006-10-18 03:44:48 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
No because the child is a part of me as well. This baby should not pay for anothers mistake.
2006-10-18 03:39:43 · answer #8 · answered by Lore 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Whatever her decision, she's the one who will have to live with it for the rest of her life. Not sure what to suggest, I believe you cannot answer such a question if you have never been in that situation yourself.
2006-10-18 04:17:48 · answer #9 · answered by Liz 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
im me or email me snobunnieia@yahoo.com
how do you feel about this situation... you should each see a therapist (seprately... then together) and see how you feel about it... if her mother knows about it then she should ask her advice... my mother is always the best person to get info from.. i love her... she is my best friend... but you should seriously think about what your doing... keeping the baby could cause stress and from personal experience.. giving up one does too..
2006-10-18 03:40:27 · answer #10 · answered by snobunnieia 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hmm, same question three times in a row by toons with three different names?
Is it me or is this ummm odd?
2006-10-18 04:06:31 · answer #11 · answered by donamarie_1 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋