My husband says single on myspace, and I caught talking on phone, he thinks its ok??

Question

My husband has a myspace account that he mainly set up to keep up with different bands that will be in the area. His myspace says single and I recently caught him talking on the phone with a girl. He says he doesn't see the problem with it, if he doesn't cross the line. He thinks Im being sneaky and controlling and that he shouldn't have to delete her from his myspace account and he can talk on the phone with other girls. Hasn't the line already been crossed? I made a fake myspace page to try talking with other guys to make him jealous, I did get a number from a guy. I told my husband I was going to call him, and he said he doesn't care, that it is no big deal.
Does this seem like an open relationship or what. I am fully committed to my husband, and I love him so much. He doesn't seem to see the problem with this. But it is breaking my heart that he wants to talk with other girls on the phone. When I bring it up he thinks Im being dramatic and crazy. I

Answer 1

Well darlin' just dump him and ask me out. Just kidding, but he is crossing the line and he should knock it off.

Answer 2

Ask yourself this- if you were going to put up a page for yourself not knowing anything about your husbands page what would you had chosen for your marital status? If you would have put "married" then you are totally right to feel how you feel. He is acting like a single guy which he is not. I don't think that he is technically cheating on you by having the page or talking to a girl otp but he is coming really close to the line and that is really the next step. For all you know that might have happened. Ask yourself and eventually him - what is his motivation for marking himself as "single"...I can think of two. Most likely it is too meet women and possibly cheat. Or what if it is to pretend or go back to the fun times of flirting and being single? Maybe you might be able to save this. Have you guys shook things up a bit. Gone on dates lately. Maybe you should do somethings that he likes and surprise him....or start flirting again with him like you used to when you first started dating. Maybe that is what his is missing. To check him out you could also create a fake myspace page and contact him....or get together with a friend that he isn't that familiar with and have her help you. You can see by his correspondence with you what he is truly looking for and if he is looking for an outlet to help him cheat on. Either way he should care about your feelings about what he is doing. You are not going crazy.

Answer 3

well guess what. My marriage ended over myspace. But I'm much better off now.

Actually my ex spent almost every night until 3 or 4 am on a bob dylan message board. He told me he had all these crushes and I thought it was harmless, funny and stupid... didn't care much... but then it started to bother me a lot... we had ZERO intimacy and it was all for his fake friends.

Then to "get back at him" I started a myspace account and started writing a blog and it became popular. I started a fake band and got into that... we made a video and the music was played on the radio and my ex got SOOOOOO jealous.

Anyway... long story short... I met someone else. I broke up with my husband and me and my man (who i met through myspace) are together now.

Its been a year.

We are really happy...

but something that me and my current man would NEVER DO?

Talk to other people on myspace/message boards and develop intimate/close relationships with lots of people online.

It will break you up.

Answer 4

If YOU don't think it's OK, that should be reason enough for him to cease and desist immediately. Yes, the line HAS been crossed. I'm guessing he may be embarassed to have been caught doing something he knows in his heart isn't right and that is the reason that he says he doesn't care about you talking to the other guy. Let him know how much his actions are hurting your feelings, give him a graceful way to retreat and "save face" and try not to be overtly angry or jealous. I suspect that he might be feeling neglected (by the way, he IS allowed to FEEL that way even if its not true.). Men always seem to enjoy the hunt more than the catch, but that doesn't mean he doesn't mean your relationship is doomed. Hang in there!

Answer 5

It does not seem like an open relationship. You guys need to work on a lot of things. You don't trust each other...it's horrible that he's doing this but it's also just as bad that you're trying to do the same thing just to make him jealous...have you told him specifically WHY this is hurting you so much? You have to be explicit with him. If he can't understand that by doing this he is undermining your commitment to him, then...why are you with him? I know I know, you love him, but how can you be with someone who doesn't even want to say they're married and who talks to girls on the phone? If this is not ok with you, and he refuses to accept the fact that he needs to compromise, or even ACKNOWLEDGE the fact that what he's doing upsets you and is wrong in your eyes, then...you might want to tell him that you can't be with someone like that. I wouldn't. No matter how much I loved him. I would no longer respect him and would not feel loved back, and that would be enough to cause me to get a divorce.

Answer 6

I have been lied to cheated on and i heard every lie you can imagine and I'm telling you now that your husband is definitely cheating on you.What kind of lame A$$ excuse is (he knew it was a hard day for you so he didn't call you) I always thought that was the time to call the person you love when they are having a hard time dealing with something personal. His mind was on someone else and it certainly wasn't you if i were you i wouldn't stop until i got to the bottom of it. You do know he only went to N. O. just to hook up with his myspace girlfriends he only used his mother as an excuse. You better go get tested for std don't play around with this it's to dangerous.

Answer 7

If it bothers you that much, he should quit. That is just a matter of respect. I don't think it's ok. I'd be mad as hell if I found my bf had a myspace account, listed as single. There is a "in a relationship" option. At this point, I'll bet your husband would be upset if you were to talk to another guy but wouldn't dare let you know that, he is more determined to be right and keep up with what he wants to do.

Answer 8

you are so lucky, create another myspace account and then act like a sexy whore and see if he takes the bait! Then u can say hahahahahha to your stupid cheating bastard husband. Your husband is being an inconsiderate jerk, and im pretty much in the same boat so I know what its like!! Though i said that if i start hanging out with men even if i met them online hed leave me..talk about a double standard...its NOT OKAY IF YOU DONT FEEEL ALRIGHT WITH IT,, Im sorry to yell..but he wants out of the relationship obviously because he doesnt give a damn about your feelings and doesnt care if you meet someone else etc. Id leave this guy in the dust and find someone who can treat you with respect and dignity. good luck girl.

Answer 9

Your husband is being selfish and uncaring. This is the main reason why women won't "submit" to their husbands (see the other nutty question posed in this same category) Women are really fed up with the stupid nonsense that men are pulling. If you don't put your foot down now, you might as well tatoo a sign on your forehead that says: I am a door mat - feel free to wipe your feet on me.

Sorry to be so blunt, but this stuff has got to stop.

Answer 10

He has no respect for you or your feelings. Obviously he is confused about love AND marriage. He should not be using woman for entertainment especially since he is MARRIED!!!

Shame on him! You really need to wise up and stop being so submissive. Make a choice. Either you stand up for yourself or you accept this behavior and watch it control the rest of your life. Why would you want to subkect yourself to that?

Start by making the choice of ehat is important to you. Start to prepare yourself for seperation. And when you are ready confront him for the LAST time. If he chooses his myspace whores over you AGAIN then you walk out that door.

Either he comes back to you willing to mend his disgusting habit or you file for divorce. This is serious and it needs to be dealt with in a serious manner.

God Bless

Answer 11

He is over the line. As far as resorting to using myspace or anything to make him jealous youre out of line. Thats gonna help how?

Tell him you dont approve and that he is putting your marriage in great jeopardy. If he doesn't stop and it still drives you crazy not much choice but to remove yourself from the situation.