Disorganization: any helpful hints?

Question

I'll admit I do have moderate depression. I also have a four-month-old baby who still isn't sleeping thru the night. (We're working on it.) But I'm trying to keep the house in order; get organized, make places for things to go...and it seems that I can't get any of it done; I can't seem to stay focused on one task. I start five different things and finish none of them. I have good intentions in mind and I know what I want the end result to look like, but it seems I can't get from here to there. This hasn't always been like this. I've always had some level of disorganization but I've generally been able to at least finish a task! It's so bad lately that there's piles of things everywhere and I can't seem to get motivated enough to do anything about it...I feel like I'm running in circles. I've tried making lists, setting goals...and I'm still at square one. Do any of you have any suggestions?

And please don't say "get off the computer"...I DO get off the computer and work--that's not the problem. :-) Just beating any of you to the punch if that's what your answer would be.

Answer 1

Honestly, there's something that happens to our brains during pregnancy and the early months of motherhood that affects our ability to be fully organized. Sleep deprived and overwhelmed by the unending demands of a little one, we feel like our brain has turned to mush. The good news is that out of this mush, we eventually emerge stronger and smarter and better able to multi-task. There's a wonderful new book on this called The Mommy Brain (I posted a link below). However, you have to accept that this is a process. Take it one day at a time and congratulate yourself for any small victory. Maybe you got the laundry folded today. Be proud of that, even if you didn't actually put it away. There's always tomorrow. One of the first rules of early mommyhood is that as long as your baby stayed happy and healthy today, anything else you accomplish is a bonus. The only way your house could be really clean and organized is if you neglect your baby. As far as being distracted and moving from task to task, that sounds pretty normal to me. If you can accept that what you are feeling is normal, then you can stop feeling guilty about it. Things will get better and you will start to feel more competent again, especially when you get to sleep through the night, but frankly once you have kids, your house will never be "perfect" again. Once the little one gets mobile, he or she will become a constant source of mess. If you have more kids (I had four in six years) the messes seem to multiply exponentially. In my experience, kids' toys and stuff will keep spreading out until they have covered the entire floor, even the entire house, no matter how many storage systems you invest in. You have to prioritize and figure out what level of mess you can tolerate. Maybe there is one room you would like to keep neat and clean as an adult retreat. Maybe you can afford to pay a teenage girl to come in as a mother's helper for a few hours a week so you can have time to concentrate on cleaning. Maybe you can afford a maid. Maybe your husband needs to get more involved in household cleaning and organizing. Different families come up with different solutions. The main thing right now is to give yourself a break. Like I said earlier, it's important to congratulate yourself each day for what you HAVE accomplished rather than berate yourself for all that still is left undone. Build on your small victories and you will be able to feel less depressed and more hopeful. Gradually, you will figure out how to do more and you will become more efficient. Your mushy brain will emerge from the fog and you will discover that you are better than ever. It just might take a few months. Or even years. Make sure to make some time in your life for yourself, away from home and baby -- an exercise class, a girl's night out, a book club, whatever turns you on. That little time away will help you to find greater energy and focus when you come back home. I promise you things will get better.

Answer 2

Buy or borrow some meditation books from the stores or friends. I know you think you don't have time to do this since you have a 4 month old baby, but TRY to give about 5-10 minutes minimum a day. This will help you relax and have your mind straight.

Set goals for yourself that you know you can reach. The Great Wall, The Pyramids, and Statue of Liberty weren't built in one day. Try to be patient and complete all your goals. Try setting daily goals such as dishes, garbage, vacuuming, etc. Then, try setting weekly goals (bigger than the daily goals).

Give yourself rewards every day, week, and month.
I hope some of this will help you.

Answer 3

This may sound silly, but start small. Organize your laundry room. Get plastic see-through bins and label them as to what should be contained inside. Work one area at a time. Once you see the accomplishment after you've completed an area, you'll be so excited you will want to do more! The key is once it is it organized to discipline yourself to keep it that way. BUT cut yourself some slack you've got a little one to deal with first. The depression is probably from the baby, you'll get over it soon. If not, talk to your doctor. Good luck!

Answer 4

do you have anyone to help you get caught up? Try setting a small goal for just the day. I would first try and get your child to sleep through the night. And then go on to house items. Don't try to do everything in one day, because you will always get let down.

Do you put some baby cereal, in your four month old's bottle at night? Formula alone, doesn't fill their tummies for the whole night. If you put a little bit bigger hole in their bottle, they can sip the cereal through a nipple. Put the baby cereal into blender and make it really thin.

Answer 5

you have to make your self stick to one task at atime, having a new baby around takes alot out of you too. Say for instance your living room needs to be dusted and vacuumed, and clothes need to be folded. Fold the clothes while you are watching television and during the babies naps. while the baby is awake vaccum and laod the dish washer at night while your hausband is playing with the baby or sweep and mop your floor then, it's not that hard, you've just got to find a routine that works for you. Good Luck And congratulations on the new baby.

Answer 6

i think in this case, if you set your goal at one small task, you will get it done. then you will feel better about yourself and you'll be ready for the next slightly bigger task. and so on. if there is too much to do, it is so easy to get overwhelmed. take small bites, even if you feel like it won't help to take such a small bite. but a small bite is better than nothing.

Answer 7

huney get the house in order then the baby cuz it is comfortable for a baby to sleep in then do areas in your fields like cleaning getting things done and so on dont let the computer be the proble m it is the thing that you have to do your thing on

Answer 8

Check out the sites for two tv shows about organization. Each site is organized by room with specific tips and ideas.

HGTV's Mission Organization:
http://www.hgtv.com/hgtv/ah_organizing_storage/0,1800,HGTV_3142,00.html

TLC's Clean Sweep:
http://tlc.discovery.com/fansites/cleansweep/tips/tipsbyroom.html

Don't expect to get it all done in one day, but little by little!

Answer 9

Try the Flylady system, She has helped many many people for free.

www.flylady.net Hang in there, things will get better!

Answer 10

well i dont know how much this will help, but what you need is some help. dont expect to do everything by yourself. you should ask your partner to help, if you have one if not, prioritize, get whats most important and go from there.