Okay see my ex-husband has a drug problem... he smokes weed and uses cocaine. In the past he has done both in front of the the two children we share ( that he gets every other weekend ) for two years i kept them away from him because of the use but now i the courts have ordered me to let him see them... i can not make the courts understand the situation in his household. So here i am hoping some one can help me fix the problem.
2006-10-17 07:47:46 · 20 answers · asked by akn521 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
DONT let your kids go over there. and if you have to let him see them, make sure you supervise the visits!
2006-10-17 07:52:09 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Dont be surprised if your son might want to go and live with dad because of a drug problem of his own. I am a recoveriing alcoholic (25+ years sober) and was amazed when my 16 year old called me from jail. Anyway come to find out he had been into drinking and occasionally drugging since 14 and we were clueless. You might suggests, if your husband is willing to take your son, tell him you'll consider it if dad has a drug screening, and continues to pass a drug screening for 6 months. Important things first, try to get a real honest answer as to why your son is so adamant about living with his father. Ask him if he has ever had an opportunity to sneak a beer or tobacco or anything while staying with his dad. If you really think the environment is bad, keep son home till dad proves that there is no drug or alcohol activity when the boy is there. Drop in on them the next visit or have a mutual male friend of the two of you do it for you. I hope I haven't opened up a can of worms, and best of luck with your son.
2016-05-22 09:03:06 · answer #2 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How in the world did courts allow children to be around a drug user? Oh my God you poor thing!! I don't mean to say this but when the boys aren't there and you know the man is using, call the police and tell them there's a crazy high man with a guy threatining to kill himself. Then he'll go to jail and won't be able to see the kids. I know how horrible that might sound to some people but growing up in a house and watching your parent do drugs is even worse and I know from experience. If he goes to jail for drug abuse, hopefully they'll put him in a drug rehab program of some sort. These are your children, you do anything you need to and by any means necessary. I wish you the best and will keep you in my prayers!
2006-10-17 08:07:35 · answer #3 · answered by ladystarrchild107 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Demand supervised visitation. Call the judge's office and ask about filing a motion to order supervised visitation. I would recomment offering the supervisor be a member of his family you trust. This makes is clear to the judge that your intentions are not vindictive, but are for concern for your kids. If you have an attorney he should put a stop to this! Also, if you ex has ever had criminal drug charges use this in court and ask for a drug test. Check out your state legislation webiste site to see if you can search for laws on this matter. If iyour motion is denied you need an attorney and can ask for a court appointed one. Some judges are ignorant. You may have one of those on your hands.
2006-10-17 08:25:33 · answer #4 · answered by bamagrits84 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Being that you have a court order that you cant ignore, you have to let him see the children. If it does not specify whether it is supervised or unsupervised, then I would definitely tag along. You need to try to get some evidence to support your allegations, because obviously the court cant go on just hearsay. Whatever you need to do to get it, do it because your children are whats important here. They should not be in this type of environment. I wish you many blessings for you and your children. Good luck.
2006-10-17 08:17:06 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
1st-confront him and let him know that you are trying to be fair."I understand that these are your children too, and you deserve to see them, however it is my responsibility to the children to make certain they are not placed in harmful situations. I know that you have a drug problem and you need to seek help for it"
2nd If the first step doesn't (didn't) work go to the D.A.'s office and seek a restraining order. When you go to court, and are on the stand, tell the judge that he is a drug addict and the kids are not in a safe situation with him having unsupervised visits.The judge can order him to temporary supervised visits, drug rehab, meetings, and force him to drug test before visits with the kids.DO NOT go against any current judges orders for visitation right now because YOU will end up being screwed.
2006-10-17 08:03:11 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
you can ask the courts for supervised visitation for your children due to the fact that he has a drug problem. I did it with my now four year old and it worked out for the best for my son.
Dont give up on the courts... just make sure your attorney pushes the issue of supervision for your children... Its called a safety issue.
Good Luck!!!
There is something else you could do to truely limit his time with them.... Move as far away from him as possible.... then he wont want to have to go pick them up or fly them to him because it would take away from his drug money...
2006-10-17 08:36:50 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Private Investigater!!!
Costly but worth it. You don't want your children to grow up thinking cocaine or weed is ok...And you don't want them doing it in front of your grandkids. I am so sorry that this is happening.
Your ex should not be able to use drugs in front of your children no matter the age!
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Or if you can do the investigating yourself... Take pictures. Just be sure you aren't invading his privacy or they will throw it out of court.
You are allowed to take pics if in fact the window is left open and you are on the road... Etc. I would look up the laws on doing your on investigations to make sure you know what is legal and such.
Best of luck to you! ♥
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2006-10-17 07:56:20 · answer #8 · answered by Stacy M 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why won't the courts take his drug use in front of the children into account? That's VERY strange! Have you put a lawyer on the case...THAT would help a LOT, I'm sure!
2006-10-17 07:55:07 · answer #9 · answered by backinbowl 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Go to the police Child Protective Services do by any means necessary to save your children from that exposure so your ex-husband can be investigated by getting drug tested and urine sample and ever hair follicles examined as well. Good Luck
2006-10-17 08:45:46 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You told the court he does drugs with them there, and the court did nothing...or you can't make the courts understand because you feel you cannot tell the judge this?
Do what you need to do to keep those kids away from the drug user...expose him...get him busted...do what it takes...
2006-10-17 07:53:27 · answer #11 · answered by . 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋