I took over his rent payments 2 weeks ago when he moved out of town. He said I didn't have to be on the lease b/c he'd told his landlord that I was staying there with him. Yesterday, he shows up unannounced and asks me if he can stay for 2 weeks until he can move in with his friend. The place is an efficiency, so there's only a little room as is. He says he has nowhere else to stay. Normally, I would let it slide, but there's no space and he didn't ask my permission. He just showed up. He did this to me once before when we lived together. I broke up with him and he left town. Then he came back (again, unannounced) and asked to stay for a week. It turned out to be MONTHS before I could get rid of him. He's also an alcoholic and manipulative and I just don't want to be around it. He paid the security deposit for the place, which I don't have enough $$ to pay him back for right now even if I was on the lease. I'd really appreciate some help!
2006-10-17 06:44:02 · 47 answers · asked by Mila 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
I am an apt mngr and have been for 12 yrs. Sorry but I don't have good news for you If you are not on lease you can do nothing unfortunately HE can put you out. When and if he moves out again before he goes YOU need to go with him to the landlord and do what is called a "Roommate Release" this takes him off the lease and he gives up any right to be in the apt or claim to the deposit. You will then be fully responsible for the apt. Until this happens make sure you keep any mail that comes addressed to you at the apt. and copies of any bills (elect, phone or cable) that may be in your name since this will help you prove you live there too. If you have any questions or need help feel free to IM or E mail me
2006-10-17 07:03:35 · answer #1 · answered by bethcabjax 1 · 4⤊ 0⤋
FIRST, LEGALLY IT'S NOT YOUR APARTMENT. Let him have the place & the bills. He is using you. You can not stay there because you are not on the lease. Even if you talk it out w/ the landlord... he is legally bound by the lease also. If you really want the place... the landlord must first evict him ( legally, and you cant be residing there at the time) then rent to you. I am a landlord now, but in my early days I had a similar thing happen, but I was second on the lease. It took a restraining order to get him out then the landlord could honor me as the second. But you don't even have that much. So find a place of your own and don't put anyone else joinly on the lease. Happy hunting!
2006-10-17 07:45:58 · answer #2 · answered by valerie b 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you're not on the lease, it's his place and I'm sorry, but you have to move. Even if you have paid the rent and he left many times. It's all about legalities, unfortunately.
Unless he is willing to get out of the lease, in that case you would both have to talk to the landlord. Then you could throw him out.
2006-10-17 07:31:45 · answer #3 · answered by Big Bear 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Since your name isn't on the lease, pack up your things and move out. Find yourself another apartment.
Why would you have to pay him back for the security deposit? You have no obligations to this place, let him deal with the landlords in regards to the lease and stuff. If he really wanted you to have to pay and take care of all that, he would have added you to the lease or changed it so that it was in your name.
The faster you get out, the faster you'll get away from him. Also, by finding yourself another place, he won't know where to find out.
2006-10-17 07:35:32 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Since its not your lease you can leave and he'll be the one that gets sued if anyone gets sued. Just because he told the landlord that you were staying with him doesn't mean your name magically appeared on this lease. You never signed anything. Take your stuff and leave. Don't tell him where you are going. Break up with the loser too. You can also tell him he'll get his security deposit when the lease is up, from the landlord.
2006-10-17 07:29:24 · answer #5 · answered by Rica 82 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would say he has already been paid for those deposits by you letting him stay with you at all.
He doesn't need to be paid back, it's already happened so stop concerning yourself with that part of it.
I would suggest you stop being a soft touch and set his things outside the door of the apt. and next time he shows up, just talk to him through the door and don't let him in again.
EX means past tense and if he is your ex, then you owe him nothing. If you don't listen to his crap then you wont hear it. There by not having to be manipulated. Your allowing him to manipulate you, so, ergo, your fault.
If you get him out, simply don't let him back in.
Easily done.
2006-10-17 07:17:32 · answer #6 · answered by frankly2u 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Set some guidelines for him to follow. Tell him you don't appreciate him just dropping by. He probably feels like he's done you a favor by having the lease in his name or something. If you say no, he could do some shady sh**, so, agree to two weeks, but nothing more! Write up a contract for both of you to sign, make sure you put in the amount of time, rent he'll pay, bills to split, etc, just in case. Better safe then sorry! Good luck!
2006-10-17 07:05:51 · answer #7 · answered by shondak 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I undestand how you feel. I had a similar situation and we as women are so caring sometimes that we help out even when people dont deserve it. It was rude of him to not ask and he knew you would feel bad and say yes. If he really has no place to go give him a day or two to figure something out, then it's Bye-Bye. Get rid of him. You will be miserable and stressed out if you don't and he will continue to take advantage. You may feel bad but you gotta put your foot down, otherwise he will NEVER leave.
2006-10-17 07:16:51 · answer #8 · answered by kittykatmendez 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would say to move. You have no legal rights to the apartment, because you're not on the lease. Learn from this. Next time make sure you are on the lease instead of your boyfriend.
2006-10-17 07:14:29 · answer #9 · answered by ? 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you are not on the lease you are screwed! You need to leave him with the place and find your own or get the lease in your name so you can kick him out. Leagally, he can be there and you can't do anything about that. Be a strong independent woman and get your own place girl.
2006-10-17 06:56:26 · answer #10 · answered by micah z 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋