2006-10-17 06:34:01 · 7 answers · asked by wendy u 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
You keep them separate, the kids are the kids and the mom is the mom. Dont let her negative behavior effect the relationship you have w/ the kids. Talk to your husband, ask him for advise, or even try and talk to the mom about her behavior. It also depends on what type of disrespect you talking about, and to what degree, but ultimately that shouldnt have anything to do w/ you and the kids. Believe me I know, go through it everyday.
2006-10-17 07:54:45 · answer #1 · answered by SHUNDA 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you don't deal with them you take your bags and you walk out the door never to return . if the mom is not respecting you then you better believe that her children wont. you sound like a good man being taken advantage of . you should have wrote more but i take it you feel very disrespected and trust me the feeling is gonna get worst . it's best to go lol.
2006-10-17 06:47:47 · answer #2 · answered by sexyswells42 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You don't. You'll only frustrate yourself trying to discipline someone else's kids. They don't recognize you as having any authority in their lives.
It's up to your HUSBAND to discipline them. He has to get their mother on board, they have to present a united front to their children. If the kids come to understand that both parents are not on the same page they will play one parent against the other.
The way you fit in, is your HUSBAND & his Ex have to make it clear to their kids that they need to respect you. If the kids don't start listening to you, then you'll have to go through the father to discipline them.
You trying to discipline them will have the same affect as if you had one of your neighbours come over & start telling them what to do.
The kid's mom doesn't have to respect you. But if she's bad-mouthing you, or if she's trying to get to you through them, then she's abusing her children, & she needs to be made aware of that, & it's your husbands job, not yours, to step in & say those things to her.
If your husband has been taking a bystander approach to all of this, then he needs to get right in there & take this Bull by the horns. If he doesn't then the whole family situation is going to remain out of control.
2006-10-17 07:02:50 · answer #3 · answered by No More 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
try ur best to respect them, and be nice to them..... u have to understand that they are in a torn, dysfunctional family, and their mother is using the situation in a negative way.. not good for the kids! if they are truly horrendous, try not to have too much contact w/ them. but once in awhile maybe u can try to help w/ homework, or take them out for ice cream, etc. it's also nice to get one kid out, one at a time, to develop a different bond with each one, hopefully makes them feel "special".. ?? good luck~
2006-10-17 06:46:43 · answer #4 · answered by sasmallworld 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should never let kids lie in the middle, if their mom doesn't respect you, forget her not them. She maybe their mom but they will have their own opinion about you, so just treat them how you want to and don't pay attention to her, but don't be rude to her in-front of them either.If your ever unsure of something ask their dad. :)
2006-10-17 06:54:23 · answer #5 · answered by gwen 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Comes with the territory my friend. The mom will continualy undermind you when it comes to the kids. Just do the best you can and when they get older they will relize who was there for them and who wasn't.
2006-10-17 06:43:03 · answer #6 · answered by Jewells 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
SET THE RULES IN YOUR HOME. CHILDREN NEED BOUNDRIES, SO SET THEM. AND DON'T GIVE IN.
PART OF THE PACKAGE TO HAVE AN EX ALWAYS CAUSING PROBLEMS WITH THE KIDS, SORRY ABOUT YOUR LUCK.
WHY CAN'T PARENTS LEARN TO BE FUNCTIONAL PARENTS INSTEAD OF DYSFUNCTIONAL??????????
2006-10-17 06:49:18 · answer #7 · answered by nwnativeprincess 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋