How do you tell someone they stink without being rude or mean?

Question

I'm in the girls volleyball team for my school, right now i'm off sick for a few days, bummer. Anyway, there is this one girl that sits beside me in 2 other classes, she's also in the team. Her locker is right next to mine, but she smells though. I mean during other periods, I can't tell but when we practice or while we change, the smell hits you in the face. I don't know what it is, maybe she has stuff in her locker that stink, or she has some hygenic problems. How do I tell her without sounding mean or making her feel like the team doesn't like her, because we do.

Answer 1

just give her a present a nice one with bubble bath sope and perfume and you could add in some jewlrey or clothes and she would use them!

Answer 2

She probably has really good hygeine and really unpleasant smelling sweat, that's why you don't smell it when you're in other classes, but when you're next to the locker where she stores all of her smelly sports stuff, you do. She could keep things that stink like shoes, bras, extra shorts or extra shirts in there. Even if she only keeps them in there for a few hours at a time, or unti the end of the week, anything that's inside of the locker will absorb the sweat, and locker rooms are damp places, so there's always enough moisture in one to keep bacteria alive.

Be nice to her. Like her. Take her to get a drink of cola or something, or walk her to the bus stop. After a couple of days, when it sounds more like dialogue between friends, tell her (laugh, make your little eyes sparkle) : "... your locker stinks!" She laughs and tells you "shut up, jerk!" Problem solved.

Answer 3

Hmmm... that's difficult. I think I would approach the problem by maybe starting off and offering her some body spray or scented body lotion when you're changing (but only if you're putting some on yourself!!).

If the smell is REALLY bad, you might have to take her aside and tell her that she could improve her smell a bit. Either way there's no easy way to do it, but it's probably better than letting her go around and be the butt of everyone's jokes. Just remember to use nice words and be gentle!

Answer 4

If she is your friend tell her straight out.
If you know her but not that well, just let her know as a friend that before, during, after class (whenever) she seems to have an odor. Offer her deodorant or some powder. She should thank you for letting her know. I'm pretty sure she'll smell a bit better from now on. I just hope its not her clothes than it's something you may not be able to help with. She could be using a laudromat and the detergent she is using may not be getting the BO out. (Sorry but its true.)
I had to do this with a Co-worker so I know what your talking about.

Answer 5

I don't understand why people are so reluctant to be honest and forthright with others....

Being straight forward doesnt mean you have to rude or offensive. The next time you are standing together next to her locker and the smell hits you simply say something.

If its her locker: "Whoa Jennifer, you're locker reeks...have you left food in it? You gotta clean that out....pleeze!"

If its her: "Hey Jennifer, don't forget your deodorant cos your sweat smells really strong today, have you got some? No!! OK, use some of mine!!"

Use it yourself before passing it to her and then continue on (or start) a discussion about something else as if it ain't no thing.

You get your point across, you save face, she saves face, its non-confrontational just matter of fact.

Answer 6

You can start by choosing a different word than "stink". Actually, someone who "stinks" (smells bad) is offensive and rude in itself. So maybe you can just hit the nail on the head and tell them,

"I'm sorry to have to be the one to tell you this, but your body odor is offensive".

Answer 7

Its always tricky. I used to work with a chap and his nick-name was 'Green Pits' it was that bad, but as he was the Boss we just had to put up with it. As this person is a team mate, stick to the facts. Don't go out to attack or belittle her. Just explain that members of the team, including yourself, have noticed the BO and its a bit yucky. Ask for this girls help respecting others social values. Hopefully, she may just go home and ask a closer friend maybe for an opinion on what you guys have said.

Answer 8

Buy her a nice smelling perfume with a little teddy bear that way she dont think youre giving her a hint.well tell her shes a good friend of yours thats why you bought her something nice,and you want her to smell like the perfume you bought her.And if that doesn't work try honesty.

Answer 9

I have read the answers before me, and I saw some suggestions to give her a note, or give her deodorant, or drop hints, or have the coach talk to her. I know from personal experience that none of that stuff works. I know because I have had to take the matter in my own hands twice in my life when all that other stuff didn't work.

There's no easy way to do it. You just have to have a talk with her. It's going to hurt her feelings, and it's going to make her feel embarrassed, so the best thing you can do is make sure that you are alone when you do it, and that you do it as gently as possible. Just be really open with her, but be really kind as well.

You'd be surprised at the stuff some people don't learn at home. I found out from one of the people I had to have this talk with that no one in her family uses actual soap (they use this stuff made from oatmeal that her mom makes) or deodorant, so everyone in her family smells the same way. You know how you cannot smell your own perfume if you wear the same scent all the time? I guess it's the same way with body odor--if everyone around you in your family smells the same way, you don't notice the smell.

I won't lie to you; it was awful to talk about. I was embarrassed to have to be the one to bring it up. But in both cases, after the embarrassment wore off, the people were really glad I had said something to them. One was a really darling girl with perfect hair, excellent makeup, and cute clothes. She wondered why she never got asked out on dates, and the offers started rolling in once she took care of that little problem, so she was really glad to know what had been going on.

Be prepared to answer questions. I had to have the basic hygiene talk with both people after I had brought up the subject. They asked me what I do, and I just told them honestly that I use a deodorant soap in the shower for things like underarms and feet, shower wash for other parts, and deodorant/antiperspirant when I get out of the shower. I also answered other questions of a "delicate" nature from time to time after that. But after our first talk, they weren't embarrassed to ask, so I just figured it was my job to be honest and open and answer as clearly as possible.

Sometimes we have to do really crappy stuff to help other people out. There's always the chance that she will be upset with you for a while, but don't let that put you off. In the long run, you are doing her a favor.

Just remember: do it in private, and keep it private (no talking about it with other people), be as kind and gentle and non-judgemental as possible, and don't get upset if she gets weird or upset.

Best of luck to you :)

Answer 10

I honestly don't think there is an easy way to address this - however, honesty is always the best policy - I would pull them aside and tell them, and hopefully they'll appreciate you telling them in a "private" concerned way than someone telling them in public in a not so nice way.

Answer 11

You don't have to tell her!Instead after she leaves you can spray those mini air fresheners around so it won't smell like odor.Another way to get her locker smelling clean is to set up an ambush her!While she is opening her locker and gets it open your friends can distract her and bring her in a different spot so you could blast some air freshener IN her locker!Simple as that!