What do I do about my best friend?
I have known my best friend (girl) for 2 years now. I am a guy. We used to be so close, and did absolutely everything together. Now she has a new boyfriend, who she told me about even before they got together. She does everything with him now. When he is not free she decides to text, phone or meet me just to staisfy me, not meaning it . Basically only when convienent for her. When I try to not talk she eventually asks me to meet with her, putting more strain and hurt into me.
I have told her many times how I feel, and she does not listen and always has an answer. I have texted her recently again, saying I miss the old days, the fun, and said also that I am not trying to be awkward but only telling the truth.To give her a final chance, and she has not texted back. Then i told her again how i feel, and she was very aggresive. Now she is being really nice to me, but I fear it is a short term thing only. I just want to spend time with her alone!
2006-10-17 04:26:46 · 18 answers · asked by Michael 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
she has a boyfriend now.. it sucks that you dont get to spend as much time with her as you used to.. i went through the same thing with my best friend.. except im a girl and hes a guy.. all you can do is wait patiently and hang out with other people until you can pend time with her.. becasue if you keep texting her and saying stuff to her about it it will eventually push her away.. good luck
2006-10-17 04:45:32 · answer #1 · answered by Dulceata 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Okay...that very last sentence makes me think that you want her for something other than a friend. If this isn't the case, I'd suggest you re-examine your recent behaviour and make sure you haven't been giving HER those same vibes. It's one thing to tell her you miss her friendship; quite another to tell her that you want to steal her away!
More to your question in general: sadly, it's a very common phenomenon for people (male and female alike) to pay markedly less attention to their friends once they find a boyfriend or girlfriend. The new couple spends a lot of time focusing on each other and may not even notice how much they are neglecting their other relationships. This is particularly true of younger people and those who haven't had a whole lot of romantic relationships.
So, all I can suggest is that you help her learn from this experience. Wait for her boyfriend to dump her, and then when she tries to come crawling back to you, snub her a few times before finally deigning to hang with her again. Seriously; it takes a few rounds of this before people learn the delicate art of bro/ho balancing.
2006-10-17 04:37:07 · answer #2 · answered by Katie S 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds to me like she was more to you than just a best friend. And even though you told her on many occasions how you feel i wonder if she knows how you really feel. If it is that she is not taking your feelings into consideration i suggest you distance your self and move on. You too can find a girl friend or someone else to kick it with. Hurting yourself like this is not healthy. I even seem to think that once you start showing interest in someone else she will feel like you have no time for her and come around. And if she does not then that would say allot. So either way your doing yourself a favor.
2006-10-17 05:10:59 · answer #3 · answered by candylishus 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you had a girlfriend, would you appreciate her hanging out with another guy, just friends or not? If you are truly her best friend, than you would understand where she is coming from. You would support her in her new relationship, and be understanding that she wants to spend time with her boyfriend. That's what best friends do. Just because she isn't hanging out with you as much doesn't mean she doesn't still think of you as a best friend. If her relationship doesn't work out, she will need you to be there for her and if you are truly her friend you will be.
You are being very selfish right now. You are thinking only of your needs. You either care about this girl as more than a friend and you are jealous of her new relationship, or you are just selfish??!! Think about it very carefully!! You are risking a friendship! You need to be more supportive of her!
2006-10-17 04:43:50 · answer #4 · answered by Kailey 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you really want her to be your friend stop being so demanding. Friendship are about understand. She is still your friend but she want to be with her boyfriend, and you should so get it. Enjoy the time you do spend together without judgment or you will lose her friendship. Be happy because she is happy. Think about what friendship really means.
2006-10-17 04:41:31 · answer #5 · answered by dettie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds to me like you want her for more than friends.......... maybe she did too, and you never did anything about it and she went off to get a boyfriend on her own????!!!! I had a best friend in college that was a guy. I never thought of him as anything but a friend and I never knew he liked me more........I always flaunted my boyfriends in front of him......... years later I got divorced and so did he. After 14 years as frineds he finally made a move! After 5 years of dating we got married and now are expecting a baby in feb. I wasted too much time.......I could have been happy a lot longer........... think about it.
2006-10-17 04:33:39 · answer #6 · answered by jachooz 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well she seems very infatuated by this guy, maybe you should just let her be and if she wants you again, try and be there for her, eventually she will realize that you will be there for her forever and this guy just might be short-term. Just try not to do anything revengeful so that she will think she cant trust you anymore.
2006-10-17 05:17:35 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The answer lies in your question itself. When your friend so digustingly humiliating you only when she is free from the new boyfriend with lame excuses. She continues to be so even after your explicit expression of annoyment over her previous and present behaviour. I feel it is time say goodbye if she doesnt accept your condition to be away from her new found friend.
2006-10-17 04:39:10 · answer #8 · answered by khayum p 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She found a significant other to spend their time with, you need to find yourself one for you. Best friends are important, but it takes time and attention to build a boyfriend/girlfriend relationship, you need to realize that and give her the space/time she needs.
2006-10-17 04:35:38 · answer #9 · answered by live2ride 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
New bf in the picture means that she will be preoccupied with him. That's normal. All other friendships will be secondary.
Just be happy she is still spending time with you, and try to be there if she needs you. That is, if you still want to be her friend.
2006-10-17 04:33:42 · answer #10 · answered by JustAnotherJoe 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋