So this is a really bad situation... I'm 18, and I was dating a guy (21) for about 2 months, we had sex several times, and during this time I made the mistake of having sex without a condom. I am taking birth control pills though, however apparently they didn't work because last night I realized that I miscarried.
The whole time we dated I wanted to get serious but he didn't have the same feelings, and it ended and we haven't spoken for about 2 weeks.
I think he needs to know, and I just don't know how I'm supposed to tell him. I can't just call him and be like, "hey, guess what, you got me pregnant and I miscarried"... now what? I'm still in shock, I just don't know what I'm supposed to do...
2006-10-17 04:07:06 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adolescent
Well the thing is we are still friends, we just decided after we broke it off to take a break from talking. So it's not like I'll never see him again, he's still going to be a part of my life as a friend.
2006-10-17 04:20:47 · update #1
why? he did not know you were preg why does he needs to know that you misc and it does not make since because he is not even on speaking turn with you
The relationship is over
if you call to tell him that he is going to think that it is a joke and you only saying it to get in touch with him
and from my point of view as well as many he will be right
Be smart deal with your lost
don't let & his friend make a joke about it
(he will be calling all his friend to tell them about what this crazy chick told him )
I am telling you this not because I am not sensitive to your lost and pain but because I am
and I don't think you need to deal with anymore drama
Sorry for your lost
2006-10-17 08:53:48 · answer #1 · answered by waiting for baby 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Actually birth control pills don't always work and if you double dose it will end up a miscarriage. But majority of the time, if a person miscarriages it is because something was wrong with the fetus. And even if you feel that you wanted to tell him, he will think that you have only said that you miscarried is because you want him back. And he will still not want to be with you. And then he'll say that you are just trying to trap him.
There is somebody for everyone and you have plenty of time to settle down with the right man. So don't rush it and don't tell him unless you both become friends whether it takes a year or more.
Or if you really want him to know, then talk with a mutual friend of his about the miscarriage and ask him if you should talk to him or not. Including your emotions from this ordeal. Good Luck!
2006-10-17 04:27:18 · answer #2 · answered by ezanjill 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You two broke up and haven't even spoken for a couple of weeks, so I don't think he necessarily "needs to know" that you miscarried. He might even think you are making this up if you were on the pill when you had sex, or that you are trying to get him back.
I am sorry for your loss, but you might look for other people to lean on and share your grief with. Like friends you are closer to, or family?
You should get checked out by an OB-GYN to see if you are healthy and everything is OK. Also discuss getting on a different form of regular birth control, or switching to a stronger pill or something, to make sure you don't get pregnant again.
By the way, the pill only works if you take it every single day without missing any doses, and you should take it at the same time of day every day.
good luck!
2006-10-17 04:16:33 · answer #3 · answered by EmLa 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well, if you haven't been talking to him for the past 2 weeks you might just want to let it go and not tell him, that is if you don't have strong feelings for him. If you still want to continue to see him, this might be a gateway, you can let him know how upset you are and if he is nice enough he will be there to comfort you. If you do want to tell him you should tell him that you need to meet somewhere privately because you need to talk to him. Then just start by saying "I think there is something you should know about, I didn't know that I was pregnant until I miscarried recently, and i just think that you should know because you would have been the father." Good luck, and I am sorry to hear about your loss
2006-10-17 04:18:15 · answer #4 · answered by andreagrewe21 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
birth control pillsa re not 100% effective! you should always use condoms and so if the condom breaks then you have a back up method (the pills) they decrese in effectiveness. they do work but do you take them on time everyday? do you take any other antibiotics? antibiotics and opther medications can interfere with the effectivness. what you shoudl do is just try to get ahold of him and let him know everythign that has happened, just say you have been having alot of problems lately and tell him. I hope you feel better just please use a condom. i hope things work out for you guys. things wil get better =)
2006-10-17 10:09:17 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i'm so sorry to your loss. in case you're nevertheless bleeding, and nevertheless have a great attempt, then because of the fact of this you could desire to probably nevertheless have left over tissue which will could desire to be bumped off, maximum probable by using D&C. permit your everyday practitioner comprehend the attempt replaced into nevertheless valuable and which you're nevertheless bleeding. they'll probable do extra blood artwork to degree your HCG tiers, and doubtless order an ultrasound. considering that your HCG tiers dropped lots in 2 days, then it is a sturdy indication which you certainly miscarried. the levels basically take a whilst to pass away your physique.
2016-10-19 21:11:34 · answer #6 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry for your loss. I hope you are doing ok, physically, mentally and emotionally.
You should tell you boyfriend face to face. Just ask to meet and be honest with him. You might want to preface your remarks with, "I don't need judgement, just understanding because this is what has happened to me."
As for your recovery, keep a journal and be honest in your journal. It will help you heal. Grieve on your own time table, and realize that you will have good days and bad days, but that every day will be a bit better. Know you are not alone in this experience.
Good luck with telling your boyfriend, and I hope you feel better soon.
2006-10-17 04:16:35 · answer #7 · answered by East of Eden 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
How do you know you miscarried? You really should see doctor to confirm this. If you just cant call him up and tell him then I really don't see the point of bringing it up later. What will it accomplish?
2006-10-17 06:09:50 · answer #8 · answered by KathyS 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just talk to him. Be honest. There's nothing to be ashamed of.
2006-10-17 04:15:14 · answer #9 · answered by momofmodi 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
There really isn't a good way to tell.
2006-10-17 04:14:22 · answer #10 · answered by James W 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋