LEGAL question on domestic vilolence??

Question

my bf and I got into an arguement, he started getting physical with me cause I was trying to leave and it makes him mad when I leave during an argument, so anyways he was trying to hold me down so I couldn't leave and I got upset and called the police. he went to jail, and the police blew it way up, he bonded out, but is not allowed to come home or have contact with me. I had no marks, I signed a release of prosection, wrote the judge a letter saying I want him to come home, I don't fear him etc. we've been together a year and it's the only thing that ever happened.I dont understand how the police can tell him he cant come home if I want him to come home!! His court date is over a month away, so what can we do so he can come home, i miss him, and it was not that serious or I wouldn't want him to come home. also what is the usual punishment for this? any websites I can go to for this and other legal advice for Nebraska would be great, thank you!!

no kids were around! They were NOT even home. plus I don't think my bf would molest, not all my questions are for myself, thank you.

Answer 1

if you called the cops...then you got to drop charges on him
when he has a court date....there's actually no reason why you can't sneak around and see each other...but if you get caught they may charge you.
seriously though if you guys got problems like that now chances are it will only get worse

Answer 2

listen i gotta tell you from experience your gonna have a first time , second time, third time and sometimes you'll have enough or be dead. I've been there were you are. it took many years to actually see what was going on. you don't need to leave like this. The courts do this to protect not to hurt you. Go to a domestic violence group listen to the stories of the women there, I'll bet they all say in the beginning it wasn't bad, and now it got worse and worse. No Women deserves to be hit by a guy for any reason at all. You said you have been with him a year and nothing like this every happened, but you also said he gets mad when you want to leave when u guys have an argument. HELLO that is him trying to control you. I know your not gonna listen to me and you will take him back when this whole court thing is over, but please know there are people out there that will help you, don't become a statistic.

Answer 3

If a person assaults another, then they are guilty of a crime. If you go back to someone who would do that, you're just plain stupid. He will do it again, and he'll hurt you next time.

If you go get him back, do us all a favor - don't call the police or complain to anyone else about him using you as a punching bag. You are just asking for trouble if you let him back in your life, and society shouldn't have to waste time and resources protecting people from their own senseless choices. It sounds like you deserve each other.

I notice you didn't even mention your two kids in this post - I guess you don't mind them being around this kind of example either. The guy's a loser, and so are you.

In any case, is this bf the same person you were afraid might be a child molester? And you still have him around, want him back, even though you have two kids in the house? Get a clue lady!

I reckon the kids should be living full-time with their dad, rather than him just taking them while you go off to the club with your bf. At least that way they wouldn't be witnessing domestic violence or be risking sexual abuse.

Answer 4

The reason they keep him away is because they have experience with incidents like this... It may not have seemed like much to you this time but incidents like this when not addressed by the police have many times led to bigger incidents where the wife has been killed in a sudden rage....
If you want him back the best thing you can do is to get him into a therapy program and attend with him if you can....
If he doesn't recognize there is a problem and try to do something about it now, next time you will have marks to show...

Answer 5

If the guy is so immature he needs to resort to physical violence to get his way it's time to look elsewhere for romance. Once you call the police in a domestic situation you sign up for a whole barrel of invasive government intervention in your/his life, including but not limited to mandatory counceling, anger management classes, mental health evaluation, and involuntary prosecution. You usually can't drop the charges in a domestic assault once you report the incident. A restraining order is automatically generated, then the justice system is bound by law to prosecute. Lorraina Bobbet where are you when we need you....

Answer 6

NOT a legal answer

BUT just think about things here - it may not have been serious this time; next time it will probably be a LOT WORSE
if he is using force to prevent you from leaving - it means he has some very serious issues that need to be addressed. he wants total control over you
use this time away from him to get some counselling yourself to understand why you would allow yourself to be in that sort of relationship

Answer 7

No he cant come home Ladies a piece of advice: WHEN ARGUING WITH YOUR MAN DO NOT CALL THE POLICE IF YOU DO NOT WANT HIM ARRESTED!!!!!!!! THEY WILL ARREST AND MAKE THAT PERSON STAY AWAY BECAUSE YOU ASKED THEM TO WHEN YOU CALLED FOR HELP.

Answer 8

you can drop charges all you want to, but the state can pick them up. (and did, it sounds like)

here's my thinking:
your stupidity if you want to die at his hands, not mine. do what you want. no skin off my arss.

usual punishment:
unsupervised probation (first offence)
probation (second offence)
jail (third offence)