i can't bend over to tie my shoes without smashing the baby, i can't ever get comfortable at night. i had to give up smoking and drinking. and now i caught his cold, have a canker sore and a hemorrhoid!
i know, i know this is part of the "miracle" of having kids but this isn't feeling like a miracle at the moment. shouldn't he have to feel this misery too?
2006-10-16 11:17:28 · 10 answers · asked by confused mom 4 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
OMG, I think someone is having a little pity party...understandable though; what you are saying seems exactly right. You have to give up smoking and drinking (but that could be a good thing...I never resumed), what's a hemorrhoid or two? not being able to tie your shoes and getting a sore back (that defintely does claim pain) But because you are going through all this stuff right now (not to mention hormonal changes of monumental proportions) it looks like you are doing all the suffering and he's not (and I think what you want right now is for him to suffer like you a little bit) Don't worry about it...as they say, HIS DAY WILL COME !!!! When that bundle of joy gets here he's going to have his own set of problems...yours will pretty much be over and his are going to be beginning. the feelings of loss and rejection, the loss of sleep and quiet, the demands of responsibility for caring for this new life...so many things like you couldn't imagine. Don't worry about it It looks like only one of you sacrificing right now, but you BOTH will! You can count on it because that's a lot of what being moms and dads is all about.
2006-10-16 17:28:05 · answer #1 · answered by Carole M 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I think it is all about expectations. Mothering has been very easy and fun for me since I let go of all of my ridiculous expectations of what my baby should and shouldn't do and just followed my baby's lead. Most women that I know that find mothering very difficult are trying to do everything "by the book" and think there is something terribly wrong if something doesn't happen the way it's supposed to. I don't lose sleep, I cosleep, so I'm not getting up every 1/2 hour in the first couple of months to put the baby back to sleep when he wakes up and realizes he's alone. Really, I sleep SO MUCH better when I have a newborn than I do when I'm pregnant. I babywear so my baby is always close to me and that makes her happy, so she doesn't cry and I'm not struggling to get things done in the 20 minutes that she would nap if I were to lay her down. I have four children six and under, and my husband is military (he is gone about 70-80% of the time and works 12-20 hour days 6-7 days a week when he is home) and I don't use childcare of any kind so I would think I have it pretty difficult as far as outward appearances go, but I really feel blessed and happy.
2016-05-22 07:17:10 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unfortunately that is what females have to go thru during pregnancy. Some females have easy pregnancies and some females have difficult pregnancies. Right now you have so many different hormones running thru your body which is probably why you are so cranky. Just relax. This is part of being a mother. Your hubby should be helping you out and giving you massages and things like that. Trust me, I am sure you are very hard to be around and he is having to deal with that. When that baby is born your husband will have responsibilities too. The female body endures alot during pregnancy. Just let your hubby know how your feeling and have help you out around the house. Trust me, when you give birth to your bundle of joy, all of this pain and suffering will be worth it.
2006-10-16 11:28:21 · answer #3 · answered by Pink Princess 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
After having three kids, all I can say is that's just how it is!!! LOL No really, have your husband help you tie your shoes, rub your feet, get you some extra pillows etc. Your right that he can't feel all the awful things you can't, but he also doesn't know the feeling of having a a new life growing in his body. He doesn't get the joy of the times when you feel your new baby wiggle and move (okay sometimes this causes you to pee your pants LOL)
2006-10-16 11:22:54 · answer #4 · answered by Tracy S 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Poor thing! Make him help you out a little! It is unfair though, isn't it? They don't get periods, they don't need mammograms and pelvics, and they certainly don't squeeze out babies. But can you imagine how much they would whine if they did? I know how ya feel though, I can't hardly walk up the stairs without getting worn out and my back is killing me. It makes up for it when I feel the baby move though! Just for that, I can deal with the hideous hearburn and various GI difficulties. Hubby helps me shave my legs and sits me up when I get stuck on the floor. Wouldn't trade it for the world!
2006-10-16 11:30:25 · answer #5 · answered by emmadropit 6 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Actually men are sometimes afflicted with something called 'Sympathy Pains" when their spouses are pregnant.
My good buddy went through these 'Sympathy Pains for all three of his babies. And we at the office had a great deal of very Unsympathetic Laughs on him. In example if his wife called and told him she had cramps...then Lenny would get cramps right before our eyes...if his wife felt noxious then Lenny would also burst into vomiting fits. We found it hilarious...way back then.
2006-10-16 11:41:23 · answer #6 · answered by oldtimer 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Believe me, every time you whine about not being able to tie your shoes and hemorrhoids and having to quit smoking and such HE'S suffering.
2006-10-16 11:27:57 · answer #7 · answered by BigRichGuy 6 · 2⤊ 7⤋
No, because women call the shots as far as straight sex is concerned-which makes the males suffer! Tit-for-tat, they say...
2006-10-16 11:26:07 · answer #8 · answered by Mr. Scandalous 4 · 0⤊ 5⤋
Hormones working overtime right now? Sorry. You will be all better soon.
2006-10-16 11:22:21 · answer #9 · answered by lollipop 6 · 4⤊ 4⤋
You sound like a big whiner. I thought girls got all horny when they were preggers?
2006-10-16 11:19:50 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 8⤋