The year 51,369; July 15th 15:36: CBCU Troops have finally arrived on the planet scarc. They got past the space battle with ease but are low in resources. Their mission – to destroy the main city of the evil scarcs. CBCU quickly come to realise that they have underestimated the scarc’s army and defences. The planet scarc is almost impossible to live on. The only way an organism can survive on this sandy planet is for them to be silicon based thanks to the high supply of it in the atmosphere. CBCU had given their troops special suits to see and survive in the hot climate and windy sand storms. These suits contained many things such infer-red and gamma vision; force resistant elastic heat resistant material and motorised limb movement assistors.
This planet is the home planet of the intelligent life forms, scarc’s. These creatures have four limbs they can either use as legs or arms; They have thick dry red/white skin capable of obtaining silicon from the sand storms and have tentacles
2006-10-16 08:29:55 · 14 answers · asked by god0fgod 5 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Polls & Surveys
I love Sci fi! I just wish I could read the rest of the story. It sound really great! You would make a wonderful sci-fi author. Good luck.
2006-10-16 08:39:26 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's interesting and original (unless it's a fantasy story where the guy looking for the sapphire must save thousands of strange creatures from an Evil Wizard or whatever); but it was REALLY hard for me to get through all that detail. It's not that the words were hard, it's that you put so much description in so little space it was all these images taking over my head, you didn't give me time to process them and see them.
2016-03-28 11:58:10 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Boring! First of all explain what CBCU stands for, your audience won't just happen to know it. I couldn't get past the first 3 sentences, so make it more exciting. Get to the point faster. You are spending too much time explaining what the suits do, let it be a surprise, that is what the movies do. The less we know, the better and more exciting it will be when things begin to unravel.
2006-10-16 08:45:05 · answer #3 · answered by Christina 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Use paragraphs. Each paragraph should discuss one idea--example:
a paragraph describing CBCU, who they are, and why they came.
a paragraph describing planet scarc.
a paragraph describing the scarc people, what they look like, howe they survive, etc.
a paragraph saying what happens when the two groups meet.
I guess what I'm saying is this: make it more organized, and describe one thing at a time so people can follow the story better.
2006-10-16 08:35:11 · answer #4 · answered by sarcastro1976 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like a text book to me, LOL, but I'm not a SciFi fan.
2006-10-16 08:32:33 · answer #5 · answered by Hey Polly 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Niiiiiiiiiice. Sounds like it's going well.
2006-10-16 08:32:03 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Looks ok but I'd use the spell checker on it!
2006-10-16 08:36:26 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
oh my goodness jus want to know how stumper got that avator i want something lik that bad
2006-10-16 08:36:00 · answer #8 · answered by fatima b 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's interesting...makes me want to read more :)
2006-10-16 08:33:49 · answer #9 · answered by Miss Thang 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
boring
2006-10-16 08:54:52 · answer #10 · answered by daveyboyone 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋