My husband has a strange relationship with his father, where I almost have to compete with him for my husbands attention. Many other people have told me it seems like my husband and his father have a strange almost in-love relationship instead of love relationship. My husband left for the military right after high school for almost 7 years and now that he is closer to where his father lives I notice this strange relationship more. I don't have any brothers so I was never around a father son relationship, but others including my own father have seen this relationship as strange. I don't know if it could be caused by a disorder or missed childhood stage. I am not sure.
2006-10-16 08:16:21 · 4 answers · asked by ldviolette 1 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
I think most the father son relationships have a tendency to be dysfunctional, the difference is the degree. If he is a rare individual and does not have a dysfunctional relationship, then he could actually enjoy his company, rather than visit just to ward off guilt. From my experience, there is a time when you leave the house and when you visit, you are actually accepted as a fellow grownup. This was quite strange to me and took a while for me to get over. It was a rite of passage thing that I went through, but didn't know I went through. At that point, he became more open with me and told me things that I never knew that he thought would not have been the proper influence while I was under his roof. It was a side of him that I didn't know, and was if I was meeting a different person.
2006-10-16 08:30:22 · answer #1 · answered by Mr Cellophane 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
My husband has this relationship with his son also. It is so bad that when his son is over our house, if we're sitting down at a meal and his son finishes first, he'll stand there at the table trying to hurry his father up so he can get done and hang out with him.
Also, the son will walk in the bathroom on his father just to talk, even if he's doing his business in there. Now that I find strange because I don't even do that !
2006-10-16 21:13:38 · answer #2 · answered by Big Bear 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ummmmm...red flag?? You obviously are distraught by this. First, there is no disorder classification in the DSM that causes such a relationship. There's no one childhood stage in any theories of development that, if missed, would cause this type of behavior.
I assume you haven't talked to your husband about this?? It sounds like your intuition is telling you something (and apparantly so are many other people).
2006-10-16 17:00:30 · answer #3 · answered by mortyfint 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Yeah, it's called a dysfunctional family.
2006-10-16 15:25:03 · answer #4 · answered by D J 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋