My ex and I still exchange gifts at Christmas...along with our sons.
His girlfriend and my boyfriend don't like it. My ex and I are still friends, the divorce was very clean and easy. Plus we have a great relationship with our sons. We don't feel we should have to stop exchanging gifts just because of our boyfriend and girlfriend.
Are we being unreasonable? Or is my boyfriend and my ex's girlfriend being unreasonable?
2006-10-16 06:52:05 · 16 answers · asked by julygirl75038 3 in Society & Culture ➔ Holidays ➔ Christmas
if you guys are friends and enjoy giving each other gifts then keep on doing it. if your current boyfriend(girlfriend for him) are upset then maybe they are insecure. make sure they know that the gift giving is a tradition among friends and it isn't anything romantic.
congrats on a clean divorce, you are one of the few i have read on this site
2006-10-16 07:23:01 · answer #1 · answered by Jenn 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The fact that you are still friends is great especially for the kids. The gift exchanging is actually probably a good thing too because then the kids see that thier parents still care about each other even though it my not be the way they would like. As far as the new relationships having a problem with it that is also understandable as I am sure that were the situation were reversed you would probably be a little uncomfortable with it. All I can say on that front is talk with you partners about t. Communication is key if you are wanting a healty and satisfying relationship. Best of luck.
2006-10-16 06:58:59 · answer #2 · answered by Cameron T 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its perfectly fine that you still exchange gifts. After all, you were in love at one time and obviously still care for each other. But this is the very reason that your current boyfriend and his girlfriend feel threatened. Its natural.
What you have to do is just reassure your current that although your ex has been an important part of your life and you still care about him, you are totally, 100% in love with Him, your current. And prove it to him.
2006-10-16 07:05:35 · answer #3 · answered by Iza 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it depends on the type of gift. My ex, still buys me jewelry for Christmas, and it really makes my boyfriend mad, so I sat down and talked to both of them, and I think it was solved, my boyfriend just doesn't like my ex giving me those kinds of gifts, make the gifts less personal and maybe they won't mind as much.
All in all, I think it is fine to exchange gifts with someone you care about, and I think your boyfriend and his girlfriend are being insecure, and you need to let them know that the two of you are done.
2006-10-16 06:57:25 · answer #4 · answered by Tiffany D 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If it is still possible for you to be in the same room as your ex without fighting, and it's not weird for your sons, then you're doing the right thing. There is nothing wrong with being friends with someone after a divorce. In fact, it is quite commendable. More power to you and congratulations on finding something most people only dream of having.
2006-10-16 06:56:09 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
your ex'es need to get over themselves! My ex and I are in the same type of very friendly waters and thankfully my new husband is very accepting to it. (Honestly I woldn't have it any other way). My ex however, hasn't been so fortunate. His ex-fiance could not handle the fact that we are still close (even though we live on separate continents) She didn't like the fact that we talk a certain way or that we laugh at nothing and talk for hours on the phone about the kids. They broke up because of her insecurity and jealousy.
I think it utterly ridiculous for grown people to expect children to behave in ways that they can't even behave themselves.
Keep exchanging them gifts and setting a good example for your rugrats! They wil grow up with a healthy respect for your relationship wven though you were divorced and that is the most important thing.
2006-10-16 07:01:38 · answer #6 · answered by exarmysgtpratt 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is good to stay civil for the sake of the children; but exchanging gifts is a little much. If you have children together, you ex will always have to be part of your life on some level. But keep the relationship very minimal. Focus on your new relationship.
2006-10-16 09:37:32 · answer #7 · answered by Angrygirl5 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How wonderful that you and your ex can have such a good relationship!! Not many people can swing that. My ex and I couldn't. Your children are blessed and will grow up healthier because of it. And that should be your focus. If your boyfriend and his girlfriend don't "get it" that's their problem. The most important people in your lives must be your children. Keep up the great work!!!! God bless!
2006-10-16 07:13:45 · answer #8 · answered by celticwoman777 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
They are...a little, I guess. Although I can understand how that would make someone uncomfortable. It's really great for your kids though, that you guys are still friends. I would just point that out to your bf and his gf...that it's in the best interest of the kids. If they have a major problem with that, then it's probably not meant to be anyway.
2006-10-16 06:57:32 · answer #9 · answered by ANGEL 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well they only have a point if the gifts are intimate. Other wise no they need to get over themselves. If this is your tradition now stick with it, they should be glad you aren't lying about what you are doing.
2006-10-17 04:49:50 · answer #10 · answered by kna0831 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋