How can I be more confident?

Question

I am 13, and I don't think much of myself. I write and sing, and everyone tells me they really like it and that I've found what I need to do. I LOVE writing, but I can never seem to enjoy what I write as much as everyone else. And before going to sleep, I usually end up listening to loud music to drown out my thoughts (not necessarily for writing, but "deep and complex things" as people have said). How can I fix all this?

Answer 1

Keep writing & singing! You could try finding others who like to write and put out your own newsletter, maybe in school, or just have a club. Thirteen is a really awkward age, 'cause so much about you and your place in life is changing...and fast! I was a wreck at that age, often so self-conscious, I could barely get on the schoolbus without tripping (I thought everyone must be watching me!).

After a couple yrs. and with lots of positive feedback from teachers and from my father (he kept telling me I was a genius! lol)...I mellowed out. When I was 16, I simply decided that I wasn't going to care what other people thought of me anymore...it was a huge waste of time! I became much more relaxed, got a small circle of friends and had fun.

Why do you want to drown out the "deep and complex" things? I always found those most enjoyable, as long as I didn't take some of them too far (like thoughts about "forever" and death, etc.).

Try BELIEVING people when they tell you they like your writing. If you want to compare your work to others, just go online, and read some of the horrible "fanfic"! You'll quickly realize how good you are!

Also, self-talk can help. Just keep telling yourself, every day: "I'm smart. My writing IS good. I like who I am"...and so on. This inner voice will eventually drown out most negative thoughts you have about yourself...IF you let it!

Don't give up! You sound very unique and intelligent.

Answer 2

if people can see good things in you why can't you? i have seen your writing and it is pretty awesome! for as old as you are!!! and that is prolly what you should do i mean if you have a true luv for music then thats what you should do! (i wouldn't be surprised if you liked the same music as i do lol) but if people see great things in you like your very talented at writing and singing 9though i never heard you sing lol but others you know say you are then i guess you are) well that can give you some confidence.. like people are happy with you so maybe you should try to see what others see in you too. i know that sounds weird or just like oh like it is that easy lol. but just try to believe in yourself. you're only 13 soooo you are kinda in a inbetween stage right now you think you know eveything about yourself and then you think you don't kno anythign at all and it doesn't help with a lot of outside distractions either like school or family or friends problems.... (trust me i know) but since your 13 you still have time i mean you will always have time to realize what a good person you are and can be. and gain confidence. Good Luck!♥

Answer 3

Take a some writing classes and develop you skills. I do not mean to sound condescending however, you are only 13. Please, give yourself time to grow and you will discover the answers you are looking for, it takes time, really. It's the journey, not the destination that matters. Also, don't drown your thoughts, channel them. Music is good great music is better, it will inspire you too.

Answer 4

Join my group today where I can help you; we can get in depth at the group. See you there, hopefully! Click on the link.
The best advice I can give you right now is to take the energy you get from singing and writing and apply it to every day life. I mean, use everything around you as an experience or for inspiration.

Answer 5

i had the same problems when i was 13. i went to a shrink, and that did not work at all. i think its just the age. now im 15 and i think im too confident. everyone tells me im conceited.

but my advice for you is to just think of all the great things. your good at singing so do more to epress that, or just do something to feel good about yourself.

Answer 6

don't stop keep on writing keep on sign in keep on making yourself happy doing what you are doing its healthy and enjoyable
you'll grow you'll like different things different sounds many things will change have fun its what matters

Answer 7

You can be more confident by keeping your head up high, no matter what people say.

Answer 8

try exercising