im currently 5 months prego and i havnt been " in the mood latley" and i havent been " satisiying" my guy. Well he keeps saying that if i dont start that things may end up looking ugly ( meaning hes gona cheat) well for the past 2 weeks he has started a saturday " job" and during the week gets off even later now than he used to... and when i am in the mood he dosent want it. is he getting it else where? how do i find out with out being to nosey or accusing him of it? because i dont want to accuse and then have it be nothing but then i dont want to not do nothing because what if it is something... GET ME? hopefullly i havnt lost you yet......
i just dont understand why he making such a HUGE deal over nothing. he knew before i got prego the 2nd time that this is what happens to me..
what is a good way of sitting him down and taliking to him so that he can understand what is happening right now to me and why i cant seem to " get in the mood"
i dont want this to ruin our marriage
2006-10-16 03:57:57 · 17 answers · asked by danielle 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Well it seems like your hubby is doing extra work ....if you let him cheat on you you will keep your marriage if he don't want to do nothing with you if for a reason.
2006-10-16 04:01:40 · answer #1 · answered by haki 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You don't sit him down and ask him what is going. He isn't going to be honest with you unless he doesn't want to be with you any more. If you tell him you suspect he is cheating he will just make excuses and cover his tracks better. If you really want to catch him you should check his phone records if you can and follow him when he leaves. Go to his job before he gets off and park some where you can see him but he won't notice you and follow him when he leaves to see what he does. Most likely he's cheating with someone he works with so you might actually see them together. Follow them and see where they go and what they do. Do not confront your husband with anything less that proof that he can't lie his way out of. do not feel guilty about snooping you have a right to know. This way if you don't find anything he never has to know you suspected him.
2006-10-16 13:39:31 · answer #2 · answered by scheerbarbara 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
first offf if he is saying these things to you. It must not be a good relationship to start with. If he really loves you he wouldn't even consider these things after all you are having his kid. If you want this relationship to be long lasting I really think you need some marriage counsling. As far as finding out if he is cheating I'd ask for his work number and call him at work for 1 thing that would tell you if he has another job.But truely you need to sit down and let him know you feel insucure and just have a heart to heart talk and hear him out. hopfully everything is fine
2006-10-16 11:08:06 · answer #3 · answered by wendy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There are a couple of possibilities. If you're not in the mood because of the pregnancy, hormone changes, ect,... he's being slightly insensitive. But that doesn't mean he's cheating. Maybe he's working more to take his mind off it and distract himself, or to increase your income because of the financial responsibility of the baby... don't jump to conclusions. Pregnant woman can be insecure.... but don't accuse him unless you have a good reason to.
2006-10-16 11:05:24 · answer #4 · answered by just_me3575 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to get to the bottom of his saturday job.
Sounds like he's being very immature. And of course, now he can say, that he 'warned' you, so it has the strong possibility of becoming all YOUR fault.
If he IS messing around, insist that he have himself checked. And that YOU want to see the results. Do NOT play games with both YOU and you baby's health!
And if he's innocent, then you owe him an apology. In either case, the first line above, still stands!
2006-10-16 11:07:31 · answer #5 · answered by iyamacog 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he had said something like that to me that would have automatically raised a red flag. Maybe because your never in the mood he decided not to be in the mood either . Hopefully he isnt cheating on you. But it is a big deal altogether!!
2006-10-16 11:29:43 · answer #6 · answered by treez1976 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is stated (even by my obgyn) that most men cheat while their mates are pregnant. Sex while pregnant may not be a "big deal" to you but sex as a whole is important to him. You two need to come to a common ground. You can not expect him to have sex with you ONLY when your in the mood. Relationships are give and take EVEN whle pregnant. He very well may be cheating. SIt him down and express yourself and keep the lines of communication open. I wish you well.
2006-10-16 11:05:22 · answer #7 · answered by Mean Carleen 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I hated sex when i was pregnant, so i can understand that. However your man still wants it and you know the saying if he cant get it at home, he will get it elsewhere. I think a man needs to be more compassionate when a woman is carrying child and realize its not always about him. You two need to open up the lines of communication and establish some kind of compromise. Theres plenty of ways to get your husband off without penetration, so get creative. :)
2006-10-16 11:29:46 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
A good husband wouldn't tell you things are going to get ugly. I would do some research and confront him if you find something, which you probably will.
2006-10-16 11:03:04 · answer #9 · answered by apriljm76 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
tell him that there is more to a marriage than just sex, and if he would be alot more patient and romantic in the way he addresses you, that you mite want it more.that your body is going through a wonderful and beautiful change.for him to use more forplay, try more hugging, cuddling, and things like that.
2006-10-16 11:09:09 · answer #10 · answered by Cobra 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋