Before we got married we decided to wait until he's done school which is in two years from now (which is fair to him, I know). But I've changed my mind. I want them now and I know we're ready emotionally, financially..... But he won't budge.
2006-10-16 03:14:12 · 11 answers · asked by autumn 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
It can be very hard to get everything done when you are in school. Even if you are both ready emotionally and financially, it just might not be a good time for him because of time he has during the run of the week and responsibility because of all he already has to do for school, and maybe work. You might not be able to get him to move. He might know that this is the best situation right now because he won't be able to give you much help for the first two years, and he may want to bond with your child as much as you do. As him the whys, and he may give you some honest answers. Don't get mad at him if he won't budge, as I know it will be easy to. Remember you both made a promise, and how much promises mean to you. Accidents happen, but I wouldn't try to go behind his back and find ways so that you guys get pregnant without him knowing. I'd wait the two years as it will be a better time for him. I know waiting will be hard, sorry :( But he probably wants to be as good a dad as you want to be a good mom, and he feels with all he has going right now, he wouldn't be able to handle it all.
2006-10-16 03:19:59 · answer #1 · answered by Kendra 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its not fair to him to just say "Well, I'm ready, so that must mean that we are ready!" Children are life consuming (trust me I have 1 and number 2 is due in a few months). If both of you are not on the same page it will REALLY damage a relationship. If you're under 30, I wouldn't worry about having to wait a little. It will pay off in the long run. Its prolly not what u want to hear, but honestly, its the truth!
2006-10-16 10:20:31 · answer #2 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Enjoy the time alone together. Once you have kids, you don't get it back until they are out of the house and even then it's not like it was. If you sabotage the birth control efforts, he may very well end up resenting you and the child(ren) for it. Unless you are in your 30s or older, you have time.
2006-10-16 10:21:42 · answer #3 · answered by OOO! I know! I know! 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wait until you are both ready. you don't want resentment in your marriage or over your children it is something they will carry with them for life even if you never tell them they will sense it. Don't rush your just married years I did and wish some days to get them back.
2006-10-16 10:34:38 · answer #4 · answered by busymom 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is from a guy. Tell him you've changed your mind about baby timing. But leave it at that. This is such an important decision that you both have to honestly agree on it independently, and it doesn't work to try cajoling him or guilting him into acquiescence.
2006-10-16 10:19:38 · answer #5 · answered by Babyface 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i agree with your husband. kids make a big difference, and will change your life forever. wait until he finishs school.
2006-10-16 10:17:23 · answer #6 · answered by wisdom 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
WAIT FOR 2 YRS TILL HE FINISHES HIS SCHOOL, B;CAUSE ONCE KIDS R THERE THERE WILL BE NO TIME FOR HIM TO SHOW AS A FATHER.
2006-10-16 10:18:34 · answer #7 · answered by shakthi v 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
keep to what you too previously planned, you'll still be ready in two years.
2006-10-16 10:17:35 · answer #8 · answered by Diana 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
just tell him how you feel if you think its time then tell him you never know he might actually go for it just take the chance
2006-10-16 10:17:44 · answer #9 · answered by BRAT09 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Accidents happen all the time!
2006-10-16 10:16:02 · answer #10 · answered by charmz21lucky 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋