Can Pregnancy really be this bad?

Question

My Girlfriend threw a birthday party for her son at my house, was supposed to go good but to make a long story short my family came and it was the first time she had met any of them including my mom since the pregnancy, She was really "sick" and didn't even move the entire time, she said hi to them but they felt as if she disrespected them because she only really said Hi and had no conversation I really can't say why it went like this but this is her second pregnancy and she says its been 10 times as worse as the first, so she is really up and down all the time and the day of the party happened to be one of the really down days, my family feels like i shouldn't be with her and says they all got really bad vibe from her, could this just be hormones and a bad pregnancy or are they telling me the right thing?

But My question is couldn't she at least had a couple short words, or excused herself letting everyone know that she really wasn't feeling good, and probably went to my bedroom to rest, its just the fact that my family is about to be in her life for at least the next 18 years and they feel like she doesn't want anything to do with them, I don't agree with everything they have to say, but first impression is a really big thing especially if you know your about to be in someones life for a very long time..

Oh yeah she is six months pregnant if that changes anything

Answer 1

First off, maybe her sons birthday party wasn't the ideal place for her to meet your family for the very first time. I can imagine how uncomfortable that must of been for her, and piled on top of not feeling well, the added stress of meeting people would have made it worse. Does she tend to be a little shy, is your family judgemental, does she know that fact. There probably were lots of contributers to how the day went. I would give your girlfriend a break, and tell your family to back off. It does matter what they think, because it is you and her that are building a life together, and you guys are the ones who have to live it. Everyone is always going to have a opinion and a comment and for members of your family telling you that you shouldn't be with her because of this situation is obserd. What about respect for your girlfriend. Why is it that she is only meeting your family after being 6 months pregnant, maybe she has insecurities regarding your family and just didn't know or feel comfortable, on top of feeling like crap. Be loyal to your girlfriend, and tell your family that you guys are having a child together and building a life, and you would love them to be a part of it, if they are going to be loving and supportive, but if they have negative things to say about your girlfriend or your situation, then to keep it to themselfs because you are not interested in their negative opinions. Good Luck

Answer 2

I don't know about you, but when I'm not feeling well, I just want to be left the hell alone. I remember what it was like when I was pregnant, and felt miserable and sick and tired. And yes, a lot of second pregnancies are a lot worse than the first. (for example, my best friend had hardly any morning sickness the first time around...the second time she was VERY sick until nearly 20 weeks)

Your family needs to ease up. The whole "disrespect" thing is stupid. And how dare your family tell you that you shouldn't be with someone that you've already gotten pregnant, because she didn't contribute to a conversation at a birthday party? You have a responsibility toward this woman whether they like her or not. Think about HER needs....she's carrying your child, and pregnancy isn't exactly a walk in the park....

Answer 3

Every pregnancy is different. With my first I never got morning sickness with my second I got it all the time. It is probally just her hormones pregnancy can be really hard on women. Your family should understand that. I would wait until she is having a good day and take her to meet your family again to be sure they get to know her how she is normally. It also could have been from all the stress that day from throwing a birthday party and meeting your parents for the first time. That could be stressful for anyone and bieng pregnant only adds to the stress.

Answer 4

Give the woman a break. I'm nine weeks and, yeah, it can be that bad. It's no fun feeling sick all the time and somedays are worse that others. This is my second and it is worse than I remember with my first. I'm in a pretty good mood all the time, I don't know if you GF is too, but it just sounds like she wasn't feeling very good that day. I don't feel very good anyday and we recently had new neighbors move in- Everytime I walk out side to my car, they are out there wanting to come over and talk and I'm sure I seem like a b**** to them- lol. I just want to get back inside and lay on the couch! She'll get better, set up another time for her to around your parents and family in her second trimester.

Answer 5

I take it they're so hormonally balanced and with antibodies as strong as steel that they've never had a day where they've felt so sick all they want to do is be left alone?

My first pregnancy was pretty easy on me most of the time (though I'm sure my husband would disagree on how easy it was on *him!*), but there were days where all I did was just lie in bed because I didn't want to be bothered.

Maybe she didn't feel like talking? Maybe she felt uncomfortable around them? Maybe her whole thought process was dedicated to making the party run smooth, and keeping her lunch down?Maybe the pain she felt in any number of places was distracting her.

It took me a good number of years to open up to my in-laws. I'm just weird like that. I wouldn't worry about either the pregnancy or your family. It seems to me that they're more concerned about "first impressions" than actually getting to know your girlfriend.

Answer 6

Each pregnancy is different with each woman. My first pregnancy I was getting sick everyday for 9 months with awful headaches. This time I'm 5 1/2 months pregnant and I usually feel really good one week and really bad the next week. I would tell your parents to cut her some slack. She is going through a lot with her body right now and she doesn't need the added stress of your parents.

Answer 7

Well, I am pregnant with my 2nd child and I feel antisocial quite often. Your famiyl should take in to consideration that she probably wasn't feeling well and on top of that she is meeting your family for the first time while being pregnant and was worried that they may judge her right away as they have proven to do so. Your girlfriend should maybe set up a time to sit down and talk with your family about how she is feeling and why she was antisocial at the party.

Answer 8

I think every pregnancy is different, for me I felt very antisocial for some time I just wanted everyone to leave me alone. I am sure if she met the whole family at once it was a little overwhelming for her also. Hormones are a crazy thing! I would support your girlfriend as much as you can. Good luck!

Answer 9

Hey thats messed up that you're family says not to be with her. She's pregnant. Pregnancy affects people in many different ways but yes its possible she really didn't feel good and was having hormonal issues. I felt like crap my entire pregnancy and my attitude definitely reflected how i felt. Maybe they should be more respectful towards her and realize the energy drain and strain being pregnant put on her body.

Answer 10

Your family should understand. Phone them up, and apologies saying; "Sorry about my GF, she was feeling terribly sick, and didn't want to come across as rude"
Hormones can change a women's personality very much during and after pregnancy. I've seen pregnant women scream and shout at their husbands, and then burst into tears.
It cant be helped if her hormones are raging.
Plus if you're nauseous, you're to busy focusing on not throwing up, to concentrate on what people are actually saying.
She has my sympathy.