I felt gulty even though I haven't seen him .I think when I am writing soft words for him ,I am unfaithful about my family .what's
your idea?I come from Asia.
2006-10-16 00:55:59 · 23 answers · asked by bookshopfish 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Royalty
First of all, there's no such thing as a sin.
I think what you're asking is - "Is it cheating?"
If so....Do you share all the letters with your husband and let him read what you're writing to your friend? If not, you're hiding something from your husband and therefore it's probably cheating.
2006-10-16 01:05:28 · answer #1 · answered by TonyB 6 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Unfortunately, you don't really know what he is feeling at the other end and your soft words may be encouraging ideas in his mind (not to mention his body!) which are quite wrong. Just think for a moment. People claim to fall in love with one another through this type of correspondence and arrange marriages with their pen pals. While you may feel the relationship is quite innocent, it might be having an effect on him which might horrify you if you knew the details. However, you do not feel that it is wholly innocent. You are clearly writing things which you would not want your family to see. Supposing your husband discovered the correspondence? Supposing (and this could be an outrageous suggestion, but is not impossible) your pen pal was able to blackmail you in some way with your letters? You'd better stop now.
2006-10-16 09:00:49 · answer #2 · answered by Doethineb 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Unfortunately, yeah it's not right. Reason being is that whether you want to admit it or not - you are having an affair. An EMOTIONAL affair.
Sex is not the only way that one can cheat. Sex is the last stop on the line of having an affair. If you are having "heartfelt" feelings about another male, then you definitely are cheating.
If your husband is so great, why do you feel the need to converse with another male? Instead of wasting your time and energy writing this guy, why don't you get the two of you in couples counseling or read a book about improving your relationship with your husband.
There's a great book out there called "The Five Love Languages". It's on Amazon.com. Go buy it before you do end up ruining your relationship.
It's only a matter of time before you start being a jerk to your husband and subconsciously destroy your relationship.
2006-10-16 08:08:47 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
You crave romance. You feed off of the feeling you get when you get a reply to the sweet words you have invested into the original letter. If your penpal were your husband you would still enjoy secret letters with somebody else. Therefore, try to approach your husband in the same way you approach your pen pal. Solve your infatuation of mystery by injecting your married life with mysterious romance. Send secret chocolates with a note asking for a rendezvous in an unfamiliar location.
2006-10-16 09:09:59 · answer #4 · answered by Montgomery B 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Would you mind if your husband had a woman penpal? Would you want your husband to read what you are writing to this guy? Can you share everything with your husband, or are you hiding some thing? If you can't be out in the open about all of it then you are doing something wrong. We always tend to hide when we are doing something wrong and we know it. You know it!
2006-10-18 15:20:55 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
If your husband doesn't mind then there is no problem but it is a sin only if the soft words are of the kind that should only be directed at your husband.
2006-10-19 10:18:27 · answer #6 · answered by John T 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it's wrong... I mean, you're a married woman, and writing heart felt letters to a male penpal is kinda... wrong... it kinda sounds unfaithful (to your man). It's not a sin but whatever the results of persuing it may beome a sin. who knows... Better think about it again.
2006-10-16 08:08:59 · answer #7 · answered by sheer♥black 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Seriously...some people on here have really small minds when it comes to feelings of a higher love.
People who feel higher love and the well-being of all people DO NOT LIMIT THEIR LOVE for one single person. They can marry and become faithful to one single person...HOWEVER, that does not mean that you immediately cut off all of your feelings for everyone else in your life.
Not only is that silly, but unnatural. Part of living a loving heart is loving those that you come across. As for me, I am married and am faithful to my wife, but feel deep love for many of my friends and show affection to many. Nothing sexual and nothing that would be considered "cheating" in a Western sense of the word.
When one has felt the love of humanity, how can one possibly limit the bands of one's heart to a single individual? That is where infidelity, frustration, unhappiness, and anger come into play.
Write to your pen pal. Express your emotions to him and love him as a friend. Be human.
2006-10-18 04:42:22 · answer #8 · answered by MotorCityMadman 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Well its not a sin, just a betrayal of your heart which should belong to your husband and the soft words from you should be for him alone.
2006-10-16 11:37:19 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You're not doing anything wrong. It's not like you're sleeping with him by writing a letter. You might as well ask "Is it a sin to have platonic relationships?"
I have plenty of female friends whom I have never "fooled" about with. I am very close with one of them, we do share a lot with eachother. When I wasn't single, my gf wasn't bothered, because she knew I was faithful.
You shouldn't feel guilty about this in the slightest.
2006-10-16 09:52:27 · answer #10 · answered by genghis41f 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋