My wife and I have been going to couseling for awhile and things seemed to be getting better. She then went to see her parents in another state and a month later I see on a phone bill that she has spent alot of time on the phone with the guy she lived with before we met. She claims to not be over an affair I had almost seven years ago. Any advice??
2006-10-15 20:22:52 · 13 answers · asked by looking for advice 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
hmm, it's pretty suspicious... I'd suggest doing some spying...
2006-10-15 20:24:10 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If the guy is out of state and it was a month a ago it looks a lot better that they were talking on the phone than in person. She did after all come home.
Her still upset about your affair needs addressed. Let her know the statue of limitations is 7 years. If you were convicted of a crime you would be out by now.
If you have been together for that long and have come through that type of problem I would say that you both must care about each other and will probably stay together.
If you find "proof" then what are you going to do?
Does she really have the time to have an affair?
Think real hard about those two questions.
Don't be stupid, keep an eye open but chill a little and give her a little space. Much better to have an imaginary BF on line than a real one she is sneaking off to see.
2006-10-15 21:02:38 · answer #2 · answered by justpatagn 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
maybe she is not cheating it could be that she is giving it thought. and that the talking to a ex give her some type of comfort, because if she wanted to just go out and have a affair it would be with some one new. Sometime a ex can remain friends with each other and she enjoy talking to him instead of a stranger you call a counselor. get over it she got over you cheating on her seven years ago.
2006-10-15 20:54:59 · answer #3 · answered by nazwats 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She is justifying this by your affair, BUT as they say 2 wrongs do not make a right! I would say she should have known how she felt 7 yrs ago & is using it as a weapon to do what she wants now. Your marriage will not get better if she is contacting & drumming up her past.......she must think the grass might be greener on the other side, but usually it's green because it's over a septic tank...LOL...you can either wait this out or confront her & lay your feelings on the line regarding what she is doing.
2006-10-15 20:32:14 · answer #4 · answered by Geez Louise 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It doesnt take seven years to get over an affair. Thats just crazy. Shes doing it to piss you off. To get you back. Why would she be on the phone with him, if her parents live in the same state. hmmm....
2006-10-15 20:33:08 · answer #5 · answered by ~*Jenny*~ 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
when my ex left me for another woman he brought up a boyfriend i had prior to marriage,as the reason. yes i think she is cheating, and by bringing this incident up she can justify her own infidelity.this occured 7 years ago and she should have gotten over it by now.i also had a phone bill with some strange numbers on it, when i asked him he said why don't you call it and find out.i would move on let her do whatever she is going to do, you can't change her mind, or make her see reason.
2006-10-16 09:55:43 · answer #6 · answered by jude 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
why dont u call the guy on the phone bill and ask him if he has been having an affair with ur wife
2006-10-15 20:30:05 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Shame on you for having an affair 7 years ago!!!
2006-10-15 20:50:46 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should start swinging then it would make everything alright trust me my friend had the same problem with his wife now he just lets her sleep with other men but, he has to approve and so on and so forth and they are the happiest couple now ever I have yet to see them fight since good luck
2006-10-15 20:25:46 · answer #9 · answered by MiZaLiTy 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Either deal with it or put a stop to it. If she is going to use your infidelity as an excuse to do it you need to decide how much you are willing to pay for it. Either pee or get off the pot.
2006-10-15 20:26:51 · answer #10 · answered by Mitzi 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋