I am always the one caring for my grandchild who is still an infant.My son and the babys mother are not married and are still living at home with us they refuse to help with any bills we buy everything for the baby and have been around for her since day1 and though out the pregnacy.The only reason we put up with this is because we love our grandchild. Her moms home life was real bad thats why she came to be with us.Now it's even worse my grandchild would not be safe in her familys enviroment if she decieded to leave.As for my son he still likes to party to much so they are ALWAYS going out.We have asked for help but they claim to be broke.They both work and I watch the baby(my choice, I really do not want her in daycare) But an offer of something would be nice. How can i prove they are not able to care for the baby.I would never keep them away I am just afraid for her when and if they ever do move out and if it will be together.Any ideas Please no put downs. I only want whats best.
2006-10-15 18:48:42 · 4 answers · asked by pyoung82 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
I think the best thing for you to do is go to a family mediator (you can find one in a court house, social services, or family sevices facility) it costs nothing. Document everything, after all, if you should have to go this route inevetibly....paperwork speaks louder than words! When you buy food, diapers, etc.. for your grandchild keep the receipts (ones purchased with your card is best). You will hear alot of advice coming from everyone, it may cloud your judgement more.. This is a delicate situation for you, bit it's nothing a mediator hasn't done research on. In any case, I wish you and your grandchild the best.. Don't wait too long, it only gets more complicated.
2006-10-15 19:10:21 · answer #1 · answered by wherenai 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are you really prepared for what will happen between you, your son, and the baby`s mother? You will need to start documenting everything that they do and do not do that is in the interest of the child. It is hard to prove that parents are not fit, and in this case they will all but have to agree to give you the baby as you will have to go to court and prove the parents unfit. Just because you do not want the baby`s mother to take the baby to her mom`s home is not good enough reason to get custody. There will have to be other factors as well. You need to tell your son, and the baby`s mother that things are going change, as in paying rent and being more responsible for the baby`s care and buying the things for the baby. You are not a free baby sitter for them to go out in the evenings, and you will expect to be paid for that as well as for taking care of her during the day, and also to be re-imbursed for anything that you buy for the baby. Do not enable them to be bad parents by not following through with the demands. Make sure that they understand that you want what is best for the baby and that could mean custody of if things do not change in the baby`s best interest.
2006-10-15 19:08:15 · answer #2 · answered by Sparkles 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You would have to take them both to court. And prove that they are unfit. This is not the easiest thing to do. And it can cost you a lot of money. But I would say do it. I'm a mother of one and live with my parents with my son and boyfriend. We pay rent, help with food, help with electric, and they payed off all my debt a couple of years ago so I'm in the process of paying them back. they have done so much for me and I would wouldn't live with them if i didn't help out. Someone needs to protect your grandchild and if the parents wont then you need to. I if I were you I would do whatever it would take. I can speak for my parents on this. If i ever pulled that crap they wouldn't think twice about it. They would take my son from me so fast. Talk to a lawyer. Go from there and hold on because its going to be a bumpy road. But just remember this you are a wonderful grandmother and that baby depends on you.
Best Wishes and Good Luck!!!!!!
2006-10-15 19:16:38 · answer #3 · answered by sweetsnickers 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I hate to say this but tell your son and the baby's mother that they have 30 days to get out into a place of their own. They can leave the baby there until they get their own place or take the baby with them but THEY have to leave. Its time they take responsibility. You will not be around to do it for them forever. You have to make them take it now or they will have a much tougher time later when you can no longer provide for them.
2006-10-15 19:01:50 · answer #4 · answered by Joey R 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋