The other day I blew up at my seventeen year old grandson when I found out he had a picture up on myspace that I didn't like. He was wearing clothes his father picked out. I told him to delete the picture, and in so many words, he asked me why. I told him because I didn't want to remember what a bad job my parenting skills were. He said that that was all his father's choice.
Maybe I should explain. A week ago he was kidnapped by his father, forced to have sex twice with his father's partner (a male), and tormented the whole five days he was missing.
Today, after he said that, I blew up. I shoved him so hard, he fell off the chair and into the keyboard. I told him that what I said went, and that he shouldn't have any opinons about it, like it or not. I told him that it was probably his fault he got kidnapped, too. After that he went to his room and I haven't seen him since (it's been two hours.) How do I say "I'm sorry?" I don't want to just say it because I know he won't believe me.
2006-10-15 18:23:00 · 12 answers · asked by Lisa X 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adolescent
his father is in the hospital in a coma
2006-10-15 18:29:43 · update #1
Just sit down with him and explain your feeling and concerns about what happened and why you blew up at him. Tell him that your emotions took over and it just all came out. If you explain to him he should understand were you were coming from, and tell him that you are so sorry and never meant for it to happen but it did and you are trying to fix your mistakes. Give him lots of love and hugs and reassure him that you love and care for him and are doing what you can to make things right.
2006-10-15 18:34:22 · answer #1 · answered by medevilqueen 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Knock on the door and go in there and sit down with him and express how sorry you are. Tell him that you are going to try and control your temper and that you know he has been through a horrible thing and that you really want to be there for him when he is ready to talk about things. To me, the true meaning of the statement "I'm sorry" is to mean that you are NEVER going to do what you did again. So if you know that you are hot headed and are going to blow up again, just tell him that your going to start taking classes to try and help you deal with things better. It's easy to see that you do love him just by coming on here and asking how to say your sorry in a way that he will listen. Good luck.
2006-10-16 01:31:41 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
honestly, my jaw dropped when i was reading, i feel so sorry for your grandson... no offence but what you did, on top of what he's been through, is unforgivable. u need to do big time work, just knock on his door and go inside, and comfort him, telling him that u r sorry, say that it was YOUR fault that he got kidnapped. and that u feel real bad for what u said and did" {i hope your grandson cant climb out his window and run away}... if u really dont want to do that get his grandma to do so [if hes got one, sorry dont take offence... : / ] otherwise both of you need to go to a counsellor. u better apologise real soon, b4 he gets any suicidal thoughts
2006-10-16 02:33:25 · answer #3 · answered by flee1906 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That was really mean of you to say such a thing... sound like you are more concerned about your on feeling than your grnadchild... I think what you need to do is get im some counseling and fast... what happened to the father, is he in jail....
2006-10-16 01:28:47 · answer #4 · answered by thetrueststud 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well ...yes you should say sorry and quickly , that poor kid has been through enough truma and you have just added to it
the one person he needs to trust is also hurting him ...get him some counciling soon to get his life on track amd if you haven't already call the poice his father and partner need to be in jail
thank your lucky stars this kid didn't hurt you back he could have snapped after what he went through
2006-10-16 01:35:31 · answer #5 · answered by mum of 3 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
first off i think you were totally in the worng. why would anyone blow up over a stinkin picture. how do u know he was forced into the sex and he is 17 so u really cant call that kidnapping. and i think u should be facing charges on child abuse for shoving him. as a parent u have no right to pyschically abuse a kid 17 or not. myself i would have gotten up and slugged u. i wouldnt hesitate my mother went off on me 1 time and hit me so i knocked her out and i was 16. so that was 8 years ago and everything is fine. i dont think there really is anyway of getting him to forgive you.
2006-10-16 01:30:18 · answer #6 · answered by ali 1 · 0⤊ 3⤋
There is nothing wrong in telling your grand son you are sorry for an act you know it wrong to do. Sit him down and make him to understand you really mean what you are saying.
2006-10-16 03:31:07 · answer #7 · answered by freeall_freeme 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
JESUS.
You better sit down and talk to him, and explain everything to him, and make it clear that you're very sorry. If that doesn't work? You better take him to get some professional help.
2006-10-16 04:20:53 · answer #8 · answered by Frankie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'd just tell him your sorry. I would also think about getting some professional help for both you and him.
2006-10-16 01:27:41 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
TELL HIM YOU ARE SORRY AND ALSO LET YOUR HEART DO THE TALKING.IF YOU MEAN SORRY FROM DEEP INSIDE UR HEART I AM MORE THAN POSITIVE THAT HE WILL BELIEVE YOU.GOOD LUCK AND GO TALK TO HIM AND TRY NOT TO BE SO HARD ON HIM.
2006-10-16 01:32:58 · answer #10 · answered by Alexandria 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋