This is intended to be a song.. so...
I see you smile at the false world
I watch you glare through closed eyes
I see my old best friend
Where did he go?
Why did he leave?
All good things have come to an end
This is where my winter will begin
Coldness, ice, this is all that is known
This ice cold wasteland I've come to grow
I watch you set yourself ablaze
Waiting for the flames to cool
I know you aren't coming home
You've left and discarded the person i loved
this is my winter,
this is what it's come to
i love you, i miss you, i wish you would come home
but this is my winter
this ice cold wasteland
2006-10-15 16:54:49 · 31 answers · asked by HA! 1 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Polls & Surveys
Yes, I am very sure this is my own writing. Plagarizing is for losers.
2006-10-15 17:04:38 · update #1
PERFECT
2006-10-15 16:56:33 · answer #1 · answered by chuco 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it is very deep.....heartfelt ya know? When I was 13 I wrote poems all the time....tho mine didn't have rhyming......and everyone told me they were good and that I should put them all in a book and sell them. I wrote a bunch between the ages of 13 and 17 and now I am 19. I was so much more inspired when I was a little younger to write but now I only write when the mood strikes me or I get the inspiration. I have never even saved all my poems because they were from a time in my life I didn't want to remember. But anyway.....this is about you....your writing is good, keep it and keep all your writing some where and one day when you look at them again you might be like "God, I can't believe I wrote that!" lol. or You might have a great memory from it or want to give that poem to someone who could feel sympathized by those words.
2006-10-16 00:03:00 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Very impressive!! I too am a writer and when you first start out you aren't the best at putting the words into place but you have some really creative ideas! In time you will become a really great writer because you have some great potential with what I see here!! I think it really shows your emotion and you really expose yourself....quite lovely!!!
2006-10-15 23:58:52 · answer #3 · answered by slip2eternity 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
WOW! That is very good. I think you have a long and successful career ahead of you as a songwriter. Exceptionally good writing, not just for someone of your age group, but for writers of ALL age groups. Keep writing and don't stop okay?
Very, very impressive!
2006-10-16 00:01:16 · answer #4 · answered by Goddess Kitty 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think it's a great poem, and an even better song. Keep up the great work! Your a really talented writer.
2006-10-16 00:24:34 · answer #5 · answered by Kalia 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That's awesome! you should really look into
doing something with that.You have a great future ahead...
Good luck sweetie
I love to see teens do positive things!
see I'm not as good as you...smile
2006-10-16 00:09:05 · answer #6 · answered by soundlady 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That was really pretty. You kinda skimmed the surface a little, but you did have some deep parts. Nice job!
2006-10-15 23:59:05 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not bad for a 13 yr old, keep writing, you'll improve as you go on.
2006-10-15 23:57:29 · answer #8 · answered by Rollercoaster 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Some sparks of genuine talent. Keep it up. (From an English teacher)
2006-10-15 23:56:37 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
omg it was great ... but i cant help but think you are depressed at such a young age .... its sad but i loved your poem it made me cry. i think kyou should post it on www.poetry.com and be apprecated for your work
i think you have a gift and you should go with it
good luck
2006-10-15 23:59:05 · answer #10 · answered by deviously_devine 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
as a drictor i must say that's good for a 13 year old teen.
2006-10-15 23:58:45 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋