my bf and i broke up like 6 months ago. while we were apart i found out that in the wayyy beginning of our relationship, he slept with some girl. i was really angry bc even tho at the time he "cheated" we werent exclusive i had stayed exclusive bc i liked him a lot and i had thought he had too..
current day: he begged for me back, and i told him i didnt really mind anymore about everything, and now we are talkign again...
the thing is, even tho i told him i dont care, im mad about it, and i get upset almost everyday when i think about it.. picturing them together etc. i dotn want to make a big deal of it again bc last time that happened we didnt talk for motnhs.
i guess my questions are 1) what should i do and 2) how do i get this anger and sadness about what happened to go away?
2006-10-15 12:56:17 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
IMO, you should make a big deal out of it. At the moment your b/f thinks everything is fine, but you are upset nearly every day.
Your b/f cheated on you, which is an act of disrespect. Inform him honestly how you feel. Don't hold back. Stay calm, but let it out of your system. Then, see how he reacts. If he gets angry, dump him. There are plenty of other guys who I'm sure would love to go out with you. If, on the other hand, he listens to you and understands your feelings and apologizes of his own accord, then I say to stick with him. But if he pulls any more funny business, dump him and move on.
2006-10-15 13:10:29 · answer #1 · answered by Ozz 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I suggest that you move on and move forward. No matter what you will feel a sense of betrayal and it will eat up at you and you will never be able to move past it. Even though you say it doesn't bother - its quite obvious it does. It is a big deal even though you don't want to make it. I suggest to not even have a casual relationship with him because you'll never be able to move forward or away from this guy. Have a little bit more confidence in yourself and find the courage to move past this guy. There must be qualities about him that you do admire, but this feeling of betrayal will be way to strong and will re-surface and there will be nothing left in the relationship but that. I could only keep these feelings in the closet for so long. Don't torture yourself.
2006-10-15 13:14:24 · answer #2 · answered by jovy 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if u weren't technically together then i think you have nothing to be angry about. Are you angry at the other girlfriends/ women he has slept with to previous to you two meeting to???. it sounds like you are re living the past every day, and if u want a future with this man then you need to put this in the past and move on, he begged for you back, my advise is to forgive him, we all make mistakes at one time or another in our life. but if u do take him back lay the law down tell him that there is never to be another incident like that or it will be the end of things between you permanantly. you only live once is this the man you want to be with or not??? you are the only one who can decide on what to do, and as for how to get the anger and sadness to go away my honest opinion is that only time will help heal the wounds, u cant change whats happened in the past, no matter how hard you try, so try living for today instead, good luck with it all.
2006-10-15 13:12:22 · answer #3 · answered by slippery seal 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
The same thing happened to me. I was really upset about him cheating but at least you know 4 sure he did. My lozer ex still won't admitt it. OK now what you should do is try to get over him. I know its hard and that everytime you see him you wanna be his but the deal is he is a jerk. He cheated and if he cared he wouldn't have done it. IT IS NOT YOUR FAULT!!!! Sounds like you did the same thing I did. I don't know about you but everytime I would talk to him about it he was the one who got pissed and made me feel like it was my fault. I would get over him and move on. Throw his pictures away and hide the things that make you heart broken. When you get rid of his stuff you'll get over your past. And when you see him at school just try to hide what you wish you could do. (May that be wanting to kiss or kill) What you don't wanna do is try to make him jealous. You'll lose on that one. II hope you do well. Sorry you gotta go through the same deal.
2006-10-15 13:06:38 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
OMgosh! almost the exact thing happened 2 me! (only my bf wasnt goin out w. me @ the time)
anyway, I suggest you tell him straight out how you feel. example:
"You know what, (ex bf), something's really been bugging me. I think you should know that I REALLY don't like the fact you slept with another gal while being my bf. I don't want you to get mad or anything, I just wanna know why you cheated on me like that." (let him talk & go from there)
2006-10-15 13:03:40 · answer #5 · answered by Brecka 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just realize that it is in the past. And even tho you were faithful, you know there are somethings that he doesn't know about. Just keep it that way. Let it go. I know it bothers you, but do not let him know that, just let it go, chances are it is eating him up inside too. And chances are the things that he doesn't know would hurt him and you dont want that, so just be the bigger person, If you want it to work, have the strength to Let It Go!!!!!
2006-10-15 13:01:45 · answer #6 · answered by Lees' 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
1) you should counfront him about it and tell him u r mad about it.
2)you could go to a therpest then see why he cheeted on you. Cause i went throw the same thing
2006-10-15 14:36:58 · answer #7 · answered by aplusc1314 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i was cheated on by my ex. he told me how sorry he was and how much he loved me. i gave him a second chance and it lasted 2 years after that. once the trust is gone it isnt going to come back. we ended up fighting all the time and i couldnt forget what he did and thinking of them together. things ended up turning bad coz we ended up fighting all the time abou stupid things and there was no trust. he ended up leaving me coz there was no trust
2006-10-15 13:03:40 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
i have kinda like a same problem.c if u found out tht ur guy was doin tht then u r mad at ur self for lettin it happen how i got it out of my mind is to get a new guy and stop think about it.
2006-10-15 13:01:32 · answer #9 · answered by *~KoRe~* 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
well my story isnt tht bad but my 2nd bf used to suck on the tv wen hilary duff would common he told me wen he masterbated with thoughts of other grls and he compared me always wit other grls and compared my butt i always 4gave him but i was always cryin. u dont deserve tht. u can 4 give him but u dont hav to stay wit him. if he gives u a reason to worry thn worry. but if hes capable once he can again unless theres a definate change
2006-10-15 13:04:32 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋