I have had 2 miscarriges in the past 4 years. Now it has been about over 2 years since I have even conceived. We want kids bad, but have had no luck. Should we just give up? My husband comes from a big family and they are telling him that he should leave me cause I can't have children and he wants them. I am about ready to give him a divorce not because i don't love him but because I do.I want him to have the family he has always wanted, i just can't give it to him. We can't afford invitro and adoption. We have a good home and values and tons of love. But I am stuck, what should I do? Please any helpful tips would be great. Please no put downs, I already feel that i am a loser and no need be be reminded of it. Thank you for all of your help.
2006-10-15 12:37:19 · 12 answers · asked by Jessica R 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Trying to Conceive
I think that you should talk to your Dr. and maybe you can get a referal to see a specialist. Once you have gone through all of the test and if they can't find anything, chances are that there may not be anything wrong. You are just putting to much stress on your body and that is not good for you. If the test show that there is something wrong then and only then should you sit down and talk to your husband about the alternitives. Bring up your fear of him leaving you, and if you really want give him the option if it makes you feel better. Chances are that he loves you and won't leave. Just try to relax when the time is right it will happen. Remember that all good things come to those who wait ;-) best of luck.
2006-10-17 04:54:30 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
My heart goes out to you, because I was in the same situation. My question to you is, "Have you and your husband saw a doctor about this "problem"? If you have and the doctor gives you both a clean bill of health, then the stress is probably what is going on. You need to try things that will relax you. My husband and I totally changed out love making. We started teasing each other, but we wouldn't make love but once a week. My husband changed from briefs t boxers, because the temperature in that area affects the sperm count. After making love I would lay flat of my back of at least 30 minutes with my legs proped on the wall. We eventually got pregnant, and now three sons later we are still experimenting with our love making, not baby making. Smile :)
2006-10-15 13:13:02 · answer #2 · answered by Shirley P 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hi i no im only 17 n u will probably think im silly but me and my boyfriend are trying for a kid to. he had an accident when he was younger that might prevent him from havin kids which is why we are trying early. the thing is i have wanted kids from when i was young the only thing i have ever really wanted to do with my life is be a mum pay bills and clean house, so the thought of not being able to have my own child devistates me but then i think about all the people out there who have kids and either dont want them or they just cant afford them and end up in foster homes and stuff. my plan is if we cant have our own child is to adopt or foster. because there is no way i am leaving him.so maybe you could foster you would get the same joy if not more from helping a child who is in need .... just a suggestion
2006-10-15 13:03:02 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
have u been tested and this is why u can't concieve or is it just because u haven't so far. maybe u can't afford invitro but chances r u don't need it . go see a gyno before u go and get a divorce. what does ur husband have to say about all this and the pressure from his parents. u didn't mention that at all. chances r all u 2 have to do is give up relax and bingo u will end up pg.
2006-10-15 12:43:29 · answer #4 · answered by Nora G 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Aww, I am so sorry hun! My husband and I have also been TTC for 2 years and he really wants children, but would NEVER divorce me if it didn't happen! Have you tried charting your temps to see if/when ovulation occurs?
The only way for you to know if you are ovulating is to take your basal body temp each morn, same time and before you get up. You should see a pattern in temps that leads up to and after ovulation. You can get the basal thermometer at Wal-Mart for about 8 dollars. I use a wonderful FREE website called Fertilityfriend.com...it graphs your temps for you, keeps track of your fertility signs, tells you when you ovulate and also tells you if there is an implantation dip in your temps. You can also use Ovulation prediction kits, but they only measure your LH surge and give you a ball park time for ovulation...they do not pin point it. Oh, and it is possible to be ovulating while you do not have your period, just like it is possible to have a period and not ovulate.
2006-10-15 12:41:09 · answer #5 · answered by **KELLEY** 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Jessica Hi
Sorry to hear your troubles but listen, there is plenty advice available to you.
Many couples unfortunately experience what you are going through and in many cases with no clear explanation of why this occurs.
We deem this term as what is known as 'idiopathic'
This is basically an unknown cause.
You are not alone with this.
Many times simply 'trying too hard ' will also have an adverse effect on your chances of conceiving; stress will also do you no good.
If I can help any more, please let me know
Clive Jenkins
Expert Ezine Author
Parenting Tips | Parenting
http://www.parentingtipssite.com
2006-10-15 12:48:57 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
you should not feel so bad about yourself. never give up you would be suprised what can happen. have yall been to a dr at all to find out if there are any problems and what they may be. that would be your 1st step. if there are no prob then it could just be the stress of trying so hard mabye if yall would just take a break and rest you bodies and mindes a little you may find it a little easirer to conceive. sorry if i am not much help but just dont ever give up. good luck ttc
2006-10-15 12:48:27 · answer #7 · answered by smiles 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When me and my wife were trying we went to a doctor the doctor told us it was me i just got done serving in the army and i had to go back to a job that was even worse i was so stressed out i took a week vaction my wife made everything at home easier and just let me do things that were fun for me and at the end of the week i didn't feel stressed at all and it worked don't know if this will help but its worth a shot. If both of you stop stressing about it and make it fun agian and not just about having a kid who knows you could get one in the process.
2006-10-15 12:52:57 · answer #8 · answered by B Boven 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have you talked to a doctor and found out for sure you cant have children. Unless you have been told you are infertil then you can still have children...just might take some work. Have you tried charting temp or ovulation tests to be sure your doing it at the right times. it could also have something to do with him too so maybe he needs to be sure hes ok too.
2006-10-15 14:46:29 · answer #9 · answered by Jenn ♥Cadence Jade's mum♥ 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are *his* beloved ! Period ! You did not marry his moronic family. Stress may cause you not to conceive. Keep trying. If you can wait six weeks or so without him ever ejaculating, wait, because after the time has passed his sperm cells will be mature and very fertile.
Good luck !
2006-10-15 12:44:10 · answer #10 · answered by rc 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋