How do I tell my parents?

Question

I am in my senior year of high school and I have been planning college admissions and majors and everything for the past 3 years. My mom and dad are always telling me how proud they are of me and my exceptional academics. I am the middle of 3 sisters and I am the only one with good academics and behavior. Well, my boyfriend and I just found out that I am pregnant. I don't have any intentions of putting my college off, I will still start in the fall, and he has already opened a savings account with enough money to get a nice little townhouse and pay bills with. He has a steady job. He attends college already and gets paid for his internships. So, even though we both know that a baby is great responsibility and costly, we also know that if we work together everything will be okay. Now, I have to tell my parents and I am so scared. I am willing to come to face with my mistake, but I just can't stand the thought of breaking my parents hearts. How do I break it to them? Will we be forgiven

Answer 1

First of all, it is very possible to go to school while having children!!!

I'm 43 and a mother of 2. Many many women in my school are parents and there are also fathers in school. (UPDATE: I also am in my final semester in college).

It is more difficult, but it is very possible to get through school with a baby.

I know it will be difficult to talk with your parents, but I think that if you speak with them about the fact that you are still motivated to finish school and the father is also willing to help you with the baby (financially and housing), it should be okay. They will be upset, but you need to do what is best for you and the little one.

I'm proud of you for working towards this.

A good resource for you is Feminists for Life. This is a group of women who want to help college students continue through their schooling while raising a child. http://www.feministsforlife.org/cop/index.htm

Good luck to you!!

Answer 2

You sound like a very mature person. I think if you sit down and tell them straight out, without beating around the bush, it will work out better for you. You might want to have your boyfriend with you, just so you both present a united front. They will disappointed. If they are anything like my parents (and I was 21 when I got pregnant), they may yell and scream things like "How could you do this? You're ruining your life." If they start yelling say "I'm going to give you a little bit to calm down" and leave the room. Hang on and let them calm down. It may take a day or two. Once they've calmed down, then you can start telling them how you plan to handle school, work and raising baby. It can be done. I did it. And once they calm down, they may be willing to help. And I promise they will be excited once their grandbaby gets here.

Answer 3

Dont listen to that ranting fool up there. You have already made your decision about this baby and I think it is the right one. I am glad that your boyfriend is planning on staying with you and raising your child together.

I didnt know how I was going to tell my mom I was pregnant even tho I was 20 and not living at home. I basically was most likely going to have someone call her from the hospital because I didnt want to deal with it or know how to tell her. She left me when I was two and I only lived with her in high school so it wasnt like I felt close to her and could tell her. She found out because she came over and played the messages on my answering machine. I replayed them when I got home and she was standing there just looking at me (as she had already heard them). I was like 6 months pregnant and she couldnt even tell... Anyways, thats how she found out so I never had to come up with a way to tell her. My sons father's mother found out snooping through his stuff and found the ultrasound pics and called to ask if I was pregnant. Then she cried hysterically because she found out that way and no one told her...

Tough situation. You may just want to write them a letter and leave it for them to get when you are not home and wait for them to read it and call you or be ready to talk when you get home. At least you wont actually have to SAY the words "I'm pregnant" to them so it will be easier.

Answer 4

You just need to set down with them and tell them you have some hard news for them. They will be upset at first but eventually they will get over it. Yes they may over react but remember they are parents as well. It will be hard for them, they will be hurt, upset, mad, confused..etc. But while they are feeling like this you need to deal with it and give them time to heal. Dont expect them to get over it right away. But they will eventually! that is the good news. Time is the key here. It will be hard in the beginning but you have 9 months to heal the relationship. Show them that you can do it! Keep in college as well as your boyfriend and keep at work. That will also help them be more calm about the situation if you just show them. When that baby comes though and they hold it, they will forget everything! They will be loving grandparents. Congrats on your pregnancy and hope that everything works out for you! It looks like you are heading in the right direction, things just happened a little before they were supposed to thats all..it will work out!

Answer 5

You sound like you have a good head on your shoulders and a good plan. Just be honest tell your parent what your plan is and once they get past the shock hopefully they will be supportive. You may have to prove it to them. By the way some colleges have daycares with a decreased cost in trade for parent volunteer.

Answer 6

If you are old enough to become pregnant, then your old enough to tell your parents. Many young people have children and make it thru college. It depends on what you want. Sure your parents will be crushed, but you will have to deal with that. I know, I am a Mother and have lived it. It didn't make me love my child any less, in fact I admired her courage. Keep on keeping on. Your parents will get thru it and you will too. You are smart enough to do just as you planned. Some days are hard and some easy. I always trust in God and He always comes thru. Take care and God Bless you.

Answer 7

Just tell them and get it over with. You might want to try and tell whichever parent (mom or dad) you think will handle it better. If your mom would take it better than your dad, for instance, tell her and she can tell you dad. Make sense? But it's best to just get it over with. After you tell them, they can probably help you in some way, once you have the baby. Financially, more like. Maybe even have your boyfriend there when you tell them. That might help too. Hope this helps.

Answer 8

You and your baby's father need to sit down with your parents as a united force. This will help them see that you are both committed to rearing this child AND going to college. Yes, it's going to be difficult, but you can do it! Who knows, your parents may be thrilled and volunteer to keep the baby while you attend classes! (grandchildren are special and tend to bring out the best in parents!) I hope and pray that everything goes smoothly - God bless!

Answer 9

if they love you of course they will forgive you. a baby is huge but i want one.. im only 15 and i wont be 16 for another 10 months but i would love to have a baby.. except for the whole parent thing and im on bc so its kinda hard.. but im planning and so is he.. but anyways enough of me.. if you two think you can go through with this then do it no matter what other people would think.. i think you would be great parents

Answer 10

I am 13 and the same thing happened to my mom and dad. PLEASE give this baby a chance and don't get an abortion or put it up for adoption/ As for telling your parents I 'm not sure because i'm only 13. All the luck in the world to you.