I have always worked fulltime while raising my 2 daughters(with my husband)until a few weeks ago. During that time, all my spare time was with my kids and my friends were all coworkers. Now my life isnt at the office and my former friends werent loyal friends after all. Should I worry that I have no friends and how can I get to know people without looking desperate.
2006-10-15 10:43:55 · 19 answers · asked by capecoddmh 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
You can't look for friends, just like you can't really look for a lover. Good things do come to those who wait! I moved to AZ with my boyfriend (previously living in NJ, yeah I know, BIG move..lol) and while he had friends to hang out with, obviously, I didn't know anyone! Well after I got a job and met some people I actually made some friends. Now I've only just started hanging out with people outside of work.....and so far it's been fantastic.
You need to be able to sperate people who are just trying to make work easier vs. people who wouldn't mind having a new friend. Get invovled in your community if work is not a good place to find friendly people. Get involved in your childrens schools. Try talking to some of your childrens friends' mothers or fathers. These are only some ways to making friends.
When you do find people firstly, do not outright judge them on how they appear (whether looking friendly or not). Judge how kind and open to friendship they are with a good conversation. See if they genuinely want to know about you, and see what kind of person you are, as well. You will know when you click with people, and those are the people that should be your friends. =)
2006-10-15 10:51:52 · answer #1 · answered by xxxdarksakuraxxx 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I was feeling the same as you. I finally had to take a chance and just start a new friendship with someone. My sister-in-law's neighbor had a boy my son's age and another boy my daughter's age. Last spring I was working at my sister-in-law's garage sale. The neighbor happen to come to the garage sale. I asked her if my son could go over to her house and play with her son. My daughter joined in with the boys and they played wiffle ball together and had a fun day. At the end of the day I mentioned setting up a play date at the park soon. We've been getting together since. Our children are getting along great and so are we. Sometimes you have to be the one to make the first step. I'm sure glad I did!
2006-10-15 11:01:49 · answer #2 · answered by angelica 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This does not mean you are a loser. Good friends are hard to come by. That does not make you a bad person at all. You can meet new friends through college courses, sports centres, libraries etc. You have a family that love you and that is all that should matter, friends come and go all the time. Your family will be there for you and love you no matter what.
2006-10-15 11:00:25 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
consider yourself blessed, some times people are moved out of your life because it's time for them to go, especially if they are hurting you or bringing you down. you are not a loser, in fact you must be very special because you are being spared from hanging with phony people. just give it time. all you have to do is be accessible and true to yourself, stay friendly and look around you. you may meet someone at your children's school or at church, the grocery store or laundromat, etc. friends can come when your not looking to, so don't stress stay real and in the course of life, they will come.
2006-10-15 11:03:16 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just continue being yourself. Good loyal friends are extremely hard to come by. I find that my true friends that I can trust is in family. Try going to chruch or a school pta meetings or just get involved with community activities. Volunteer in a local hospital. It takes time, but friends will come.
2006-10-15 10:59:37 · answer #5 · answered by yournotalone 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you attend a church, it's really easy to get to know people through it. Get involved un Sunday school classes and such. Otherwise, you could take classes in something you enjoy but have never done, like dancing or yoga etc. Make sure to take the initiative in friendships, though. People won't think it's desperate; they'll just be flattered.
2006-10-15 10:47:54 · answer #6 · answered by kate 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Listen this doesn't make you a loser... the way i see it you should be glad you got rid of those poeple who weren't good friends anyway why would you want to have those kinds of people around... don't go up to random people and just introduce yourself but put yourself out there where you can meet new people and then with those who you click just stay in touch and you'll see that slowly you'll make friends...
2006-10-15 10:47:51 · answer #7 · answered by sadgreeneyes3 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's just like being the new kid in grade school.You always start out with no friends but in no time at all you're the most popular kid in school. Just try to get active and chances are,you'll find good friends plus more.
2006-10-15 10:50:09 · answer #8 · answered by Nora 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There's probably some online communities you could join with other mothers? Meet some other ladies at the park and invite them over for a get together! That way you and your kids can meet new friends....
2006-10-15 10:46:18 · answer #9 · answered by bezsenný 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Look, in life obviously not everyone can be a winner, it necessarilly follows that some must lose. It is quite obvious you are one of life's losers, get used to it, embrace it, it is your 'style' and it sems to pretty much everyone..you are very very good at it xx
2006-10-15 10:46:38 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋