my husband?

Question

im getting paranoid about my husband seeing someone else hes started going out more with mates we been together 10 years he never use to go out its driving me mad

Answer 1

well, ask his buddies what's going on.

Answer 2

Do you ever feel like you need more?

Even people that are happy in their marriages may feel as if they need more... I'm not talking about seeing someone else... I'm talking about more than just what the marriage has to offer... a life or a title per say other than husband, provider, and father. Such as a friend, buddy, comrad?

Have you discussed this with your husband? Unless there is reason to not trust him you won't be doing yourself any favors by not trusting him.

Where are these mates hanging out at? Ask your husband how he would feel if it were you hanging out at these places with your friends. If he gets defensive... then there may be reason to be worried. Just be sure not to come across in an offensive manner which will automatically put him on the defense even if he isn't doing anything wrong.

Answer 3

Sorry to hear that, its a difficult position to be in.

I think you need to talk to him. I know it sounds obvious, but if you are worrying then some of the communcation has probably been lost between you anyway. Don't make it sound like you are having a go at him/accusing him (it maybe as simple as he is having a lifestyle change) just bring it up lightly and maybe ask if you can come out with him too. Renew your ways of having fun together! Make it sound like a laugh!

If he is avoiding the issue, calmly and without accusations, explain your worries to him. Hopefully he will talk about it rationally with you and set your mind at ease. If he gets annoyed or angry just stay calm, anger will only make the situation worse.

Good luck! hope its all fine!

Answer 4

How often does he go out with his mates? Do you go out with yours? It would be an odd relationship if you didn't do things on your own now and again. You do need to have your own space but it doesn't mean he's seeing anyone else. When you say he never used to go out [with his mates], do you mean NEVER!! That would drive me nuts and I've been married 14 years. I'd be more worried about the relationship if you just went out alone with your own mates but didn't go out together. I hope you do do things together.

Answer 5

hmmmm follow him.....see what he's up to...maybe he's bored after 10 years and just fancies a night out with the lads, but then again you know him best so if he starts acting differently then have something to worry about....if he comes home smelling of make-up and perfume...then you have something to be paranoid about....start worrying when he doesn't come home at night, and if he stops paying attention to you in the bedroom then there's definitely something going on...that's a sure sign that he will be cheating, and yes he will cover his tracks, he will have an alibi....his mates will cover for him...just keep an eye on him, if you feel that he's up to no good...confront him, ask him to his face what he's up yo...if he reacts defensively...then demand to know what he's doing...he owes you that much...BUT he may just be having a laugh with the lads.....

Answer 6

Are you really paranoid or is there something that you know and are afraid to admit it. The next time he says he is going out, grab your purse and go with him. If he doesn't want you to go or changes his mind and stays in, hire a private detective to follow him for a bit.

There is no reason to be paranoid, you can find out the answer if you look yourself. Check cell phone records, credit card charges, etc. Good luck to you!

Answer 7

How old is he? A man do need friends. male of female. If yo are uneasy about his behaviour then go with him. Or ask his friends to come around once in a while. In that way you know who they are and how they behave. Make sure you go out with your won mates to the same place. Surprise him.

Answer 8

u could just be being paranoid here! ive been in this situation and he could just purley be going out for a few drinks with the lads, you cant accuse him till u have definate evidence, on the sly and i know its wrong mayb check thru his mobile phone and look thru his pockets, y dont u suggest u n him going out for a nice drink and see his reaction to that, or say to him im going out with my mates and see if he likes it, and really doll urself up so u look stunnin. Good Luck chick and i hope it isnt bad news for u! x

Answer 9

maybe he is just reliving his youth or found some new friends,a decent pub to go to.
there could be any number of reasons,maybe nights in are becoming less exciting or even boring.
there are only so many conversations you can have.
maybe suggesting you both go out together might help.
mike

Answer 10

have you tried talking with him about your fears? alot of the time your gut feeling is right on. this happened to me and I finally had to let go and I now have a man that i can trust. that is a good feeling. Let him know that you have ur suspisions and see where it goes from there.. Like my grandmother told me, if you don't see it, it didn't happen. does he call u from where he is? Do u know where he is when he goes with his friends? maybe u need to know the answers to those ?'s before u talk with him, have proof girl!

Answer 11

you can't jump the gun. Maybe he is feeling good about himself or something changed for the better in him. If you have no proof then don't just assume. Get proof or just ask him what is going on. You will be able to tell by his reactions.