I've been married for over 10yrs. and been together for over 15yrs. I am working a job where I get out late and have to opportunity to go out with my friends after work, male and female, my husband is starting to get really upset, thinking I'm finding someone else. I've NEVER been unfaithful, he has no reason to think that. I've been home with our children for many many years and now I want to start having some fun, he's had his, the first 7+ years it would be 2am before he even thought of coming home, now that the shoe is on the other foot so to speak he doesn't like it....am I wrong for doing this??
2006-10-15 05:51:35 · 18 answers · asked by ohsouncertain 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
No, you're not in the wrong for wanting some of your freedom back.
But if you are going out with your friends every night, I can understand why your husband would be getting upset. How many nights do you come home and do something with him? He could very well be feeling left out.
If you do have a good balance of friends and husband time....then he might just be whining. :/ I hope that he's not accusing you of unfaithfulness to cover any of his actions.
Though situation, but good luck!
2006-10-15 05:56:41 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
No mayby he is just feeling insecure because you seem to have this new and fanstic life and he may feel he dosn't live up to those standards, try to negotiate with your husband on what he see's as an acceptable amount of times per week or month for you to go out and negotiate, he is just not used to you working away from the home, give him time and talk it through.
2006-10-15 13:09:15 · answer #2 · answered by ozi_nut 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think your hubby is feeling left out. You could invite him to meet your friends. Also this is the person you're suppose to have a special relationship with. If you spend all your time at work with work friends you are neglecting him and your relationship with him. I would suggest every few weeks or so dropping the kids at a friend's house and just going out on a date. In order to get something out of a marriage you must put something in.
2006-10-15 13:00:43 · answer #3 · answered by X M 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have you ever considered that he might be longing for your company? I'm sure your feelings would be hurt if he didn't care how late you were out, or with whom.
Try to let him know where you are if you stay out, and like was said above, include him if he wishes.
I'm having the same problems with my woman who always used to tell me how much she loved just being home with me at night. Now she seems to find more and more reasons to stay out at night. I'm pretty hurt. So be gentle with your man, we have feelings too.
2006-10-15 13:02:09 · answer #4 · answered by Dr. Feelgood 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No your not wrong , but when the shoe is on the other foot he maybe remembering what he did till 2 am. Try talking to him tell him you put your life on hold for him and the kids now you need a breather ,but remind him , he is still number one.
2006-10-15 13:00:21 · answer #5 · answered by martha g 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No I can't say your wrong I feel if you want to hang out with friends from work,why not. If he is so worried about you meeting other men etc. Have him meet you out!! You might rebuild your relationship,plus if you think about it you can make it like a date.Know what I mean? Build a scenario around it it will spice up you sex life and make it more exciting.....Think about and have fun life is too short...Good Luck!
2006-10-15 12:58:14 · answer #6 · answered by SpecialLdy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, you're not wrong. I think he got used to thinking of you as always there and now he's having a hard time adjusting to this change. I think he knows you're not doing anything wrong but doesn't feel comfortable telling you he misses the way things were.
2006-10-15 12:58:19 · answer #7 · answered by Lovely 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Having fun is a good thing. Get a babysitter and bring him with you. It'll let him know who you hang out with after work, and what ya'll do. It'll be good for the both of you to get out and have fun together.
2006-10-15 12:57:47 · answer #8 · answered by kountry_kandi 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't believe in right or wrong. If you really desire doing this, you probably will anyway. In which case, it is right for you.
Going out like that will provide you with a certain amount of temptations. Can you handle such temptation? is the question.
2006-10-15 12:56:01 · answer #9 · answered by tarro 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He is right, you are looking. It is only a matter of time if you continue down this road. You know this deep down already you just want to hear it out loud. So now you have. Now you have a decision to make. Only you can do that. No one here can help you with that.
2006-10-15 12:58:35 · answer #10 · answered by Mitch 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋