What does 'being in love' mean?

Question

When you've taken away lust, neurotic dependency, adoration (e.g. religious 'love'), and passing fancies what do you have left?

It would be nice if you could say whether you are speaking from direct experience or simply speculating. Sorry but speculation doesn't really count. It would also be nice if you could say how you were sure that what you had was 'love' and not some other condition.

Just a little more background on this question. I've been married for 31 years, and have never stopped thinking about somebody I've never seen or spoken to for 32 years.

Answer 1

I've been married for ten years now, and trust me, the lust, neurotic dependency and adoration faded a long time ago. What's left is a day to day happy, loving relationship with the man who is now my best friend, confidante, comforter and support. I still think he's the sexiest, most handsome man in the world, despite the smelly feet, and wouldn't swap what we have now for all the tea in china!

I can only say I knew it was love when I realised he was still here after my post-natal depression. Trust me, I would have left me if I could, so I was stunned when I recovered and noticed he had stayed!

Answer 2

No-one can tell you. No-one can describe it. It is the most intense emotion any human being is capable of experiencing yet is totally unique to yourself and the person you love. No two "loves" are the same so it's pointless asking us to describe it for you. And as Ohio says, you will only know what it is when it strikes. It can come at you (and usually does) when you least expect it so be prepared!!

I once saw someone stumble on a beach. Took less than a millisecond but that was it struck long and deep, right in the heart.

Answer 3

I think being 'in love' means different things to different people. It can also be something that we tell ourselves we are to make ourselves feel better (say if we're in a relationship that we know is wrong, but are too scared to get out of). It is easy to convince yourself that you are 'in love'. It is only when you fall 'in love' with someone else that you realise you weren't 'in love' after all. There is no right or wrong definition.

However, I don't think you're 'in love' with the person you've not had contact with for 32 years. You're 'in love' with an idea, of what 'might have been', and as happens all too often, if you were to persue this you would find that your dreams would not be fulfilled, and you'd realise that you were 'in love' with your wife all along. That's only my opinion though (based on various films and novels I've encountered).

By the way, thanks for your answer, it was really interesting.

Answer 4

True Love

I feel you in my heart
with every breath I take.

I smell your scent of happiness
in every morning we awake.

I touch your smooth and tender face
with every chance l get.

The feeling of your presence
makes me happy, we met.

I know everything, but nothing about you
and I love you in so many wonderful ways.

My heart knows when you’re near me
and it knows when you’re away.

It doesn’t matter what you look like
neither tall, short, skinny or fat.

Your skin is soft without color
and hair as smooth as a cat.

My love for you will never change
and you will always be on my mind.

I wish you could see what I see
from the heart of one who’s blind.


By: Kenny P. aka-Cobra

Answer 5

Love is about a deep respect and genuine liking of that person. It is about truly caring for their well being, it is, after all the ups and downs, about wanting to still spend time with that person. A deep contentment when you are together, enjoying things more when they are shared. It is about that person feeling the same way about you, mutual trust and shared aims. Still being turned on by them and able to turn them on.

Answer 6

When you have this person in your mind the minute any question pops up, they are the answer.

You care about what this person wants more than what you want and you want to please this person whether you are pleased or not.

You put this person beside you and treat them as if you are treating yourself. If you are not with them, half of you is missing.

You would rather be with this person than anyone or than being alone.

Answer 7

Being in love is when you care more about the other person's happiness more than your own. It's when you think about them all the time. Little things about them gives you a thrill.

Answer 8

Love is a simple feeling really. You would be willing to put your life on the line for that person. You have to love that person a lot for this, and also think that they deserve it. Could you, would you do this for the one you loved? If you wouldn't, you do not love enough..

Answer 9

being in love is... when you cant stop thinking about the person, its when you wake up in the morning he's the first thing on your mind and when you go to sleep he's the last thing on your mind. You're inlove when almost every hour of the day you can't get him out of your mind, even when your busy he still registers your system. YOu're inlove when everytime you hear love song, it makes you feel sad...sometimes it makes you cry... Then you start playing love songs that you don't normally do. When you see couples walking hand in hand you see yourself with him/her, you're inlove when you can't wait til you see them again, you always want to hear their voice, and when your face to face you can't get your eyes off him... you love listening to him when talkingand just paying attention, you never get tired of listening. its when you think of him your heart beats so fast... and when you see them you feel your knees trembling, your heart pounding its like being nervous but your not... you're inlove when you hear somebody mention their name it makes your heart beat so fast... it's when you always wish to see him/her... always want to hear about them or hear from them. That's how am feeling feeling now...

Answer 10

see this words & understand somthing..!

When you are together with that special someone, you pretend to ignore
that person. But when that special someone is not around, you might look around
to find them. At that moment, you are in love.


>Although there is someone else who always makes you laugh,
your eyes and attention might go only to that special someone.
Then, you are in love...!