This is quite a long story so I will cut it back as much as I can. My daughters father has not been involved in her life in any way for almost 4 years, however his family has been. I recently found out that my daughters grandfather (ex's dad) has been caught drugging his ex girlfriend & taking explicit photos of her whilest she was out of it. I know my ex's family & know that they wont tell me but they dont know that I already know about it. I am so confused as to how I should deal with this situation as I dont want to break the bond my daughter has with her family but they all live together in the one house (my daughters grandfather included) I dont want to "out" the person who told me but there is no way I will be allowing my daughter to go there anymore. How do I approach this when confronted by this family? I know they will be around my place in the next few days wanting to see my girl but how do I say to them that she will not ever be going to their place? I dont want disharmony!!
2006-10-14 18:45:53 · 5 answers · asked by Mrs D 6 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
My daughter is only 5 years old. I have had what I thought to be a great relationship with her family but I just dont want to be involved. I am fairly confident that it is only the grandfather involved in this horrid mess but the rest of his family will support him & will go against me if I say anything about what I know. The grandfathers ex is quite erratic but I do believe her as she has the evidence & has contacted the police already. I dont like this one bit & just dont know how to deal with it all.
2006-10-14 18:48:13 · update #1
I like the way people use the quotation marks on the word disharmony...it is a word people!!! Would it sound better if I said I dont want this chaotic bs in mine or my daughters life? lol, does sound better doesnt it!
2006-10-14 19:14:58 · update #2
You are absolutely correct no unsupervised visits with the the grand father. He can see her when the entire family is together. You don't have to give a reason, If your daughter might be in danger. Tell grandpa that your daughters impressionable and doesn't understand living to gether and that she is asking to many questions.
2006-10-14 18:56:01 · answer #1 · answered by timex846 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you have no choice as to advise them you will not allow you 5 year old in that house, You do not have to tell them how you found out only that you know the truth, this is definatly not the enviroment for a 5yr old and if they try to cover this mess up more the reason for you to deny access. You need to protect this child more than she needs this sort of family. If you know any seniors that you see having good qualities you might make friends with them so this little girl has an extended family of good quality
2006-10-15 02:23:01 · answer #2 · answered by rkilburn410 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
In the long run, it is always better to have everything out in the open so that there are no misunderstandings. Maybe you have not heard the whole truth about the grandfather. Find out his side of the story.
2006-10-15 01:49:59 · answer #3 · answered by kuku 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know that you dont want to cause chaos and "disharmony" in their family bu it is truly the best/safest thing for your daughter, you have to do whatever it takes to keep her in a safe enviroment where she feels safe and you feel confortable about where she is/who she is with. Sorry to say..but you just might have to cause "disharmony" to keep your daughter safe. I feel for you, sorry itds like that man. Good luck=)
2006-10-15 01:52:42 · answer #4 · answered by girl 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can't help it. Just tell them the truth. Or suffer the consequences just because you don't want "disharmony".
2006-10-15 01:49:05 · answer #5 · answered by ~Amor~ 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋