My fiance told me she stopped smoking, but I know for a fact she still does. I confronted her twice, and she told me to stop being crazy and even spun the web that I didnt trust her. I went with my gut and found out that she is still smoking. Not sure how to bring this up to her or how to handle it. I feel betrayed and lied to. I feel like a fool.
2006-10-14 17:50:17 · 16 answers · asked by Rich 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I hate the fact that she lies about it. I hate pot smoking and what it does to a person, this plus it is illegal.. It is very important to me
2006-10-14 17:54:09 · update #1
I gave her the ultimatum early this summer..
2006-10-14 17:54:45 · update #2
We actually got off the phone 5 minutes ago and the topic of trust came up I laid the guilt on her pretty thick. She knows I hate it, yet continues to do so.
2006-10-14 17:56:58 · update #3
Well you might want to ask yourself if you can deal with that for the rest of your life or not..if it bothers you that much..and
If she is lying about it now to cover it up..What else will she lie to you about in the future???
If I were you I would bail..once trust is broken it is something that is very hard to get over or have for that someone again..especially if she loved you the same, then why would she lie to you??...you will always question her now and wether or not she is being honest with you...been there done that...and it sucks..My advice would be to be with someone you can trust and doesn't have something about them that bothers you to this extreme.
Best of luck to you in whatever decision you make...but remember it is probably less pain in the long run to leave now...then to stay with someone who you will question what they say every day...
2006-10-14 20:52:18 · answer #1 · answered by Blondeee36 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The reason you feel betrayed and lied to is because you were. I have known a lot of potheads in my time, and I have not known one of them who would stop, no matter the consequences, with ultimatums. But, maybe your fiance will be different? Lay it out for her with no mealy mouthed stuff. Tell her she quits the pot smoking or the relationship is over. This should be a clear cut deal breaker for you. It will be hard to do, but you will save yourself alot of future hassle and heartache if you stick to your guns about it now.
2006-10-14 18:00:44 · answer #2 · answered by Slimsmom 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Here is the deal guy. You fell in love with her. Accept her or leave. That is it.
Quit trying to change her. She smokes pot! So What! Now what?
Tell her that you don't like it, don't make it obvious around you and then forget about it.
Quit trying to check up on her and making her lie to cover up something that she did before you ever existed in her life.
Have you ever heard of "Unconditional love"? Your marriage isn't going to last unless you both can be honest without fear of reprocussion from the other person.
Are you perfect? Its pot, get over it. She isn't doing heroin.
2006-10-14 18:14:05 · answer #3 · answered by Honey 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
From what you have defined he looks such as you would be one hell of a husband once you ultimately tie the knot. "wink" "wink". That become finished sarcasm via the way, he looks like he's a waste of time for you. He needless to say has an argument with dependancy being that he liquids, does pot and now which you understand of is doing pills. This in simple terms smells no longer reliable.
2016-10-19 10:19:14 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I feel for you. Please, for your own good, take my advice-- GET OUT OF IT NOW! The fact is she can't be trusted with this, and soon you'll be wondering what else she's lying about. I too was in this situation and I made the wrong choice. You'll be much happier with someone else.
2006-10-14 18:19:56 · answer #5 · answered by B. Miller 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Pot realy does change a person. i smoked alot back in the day and im better of with it now. but i have seen it shange a few people in my day.
2006-10-14 18:02:44 · answer #6 · answered by rjl2382 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds as if she is not ready to give it up. You need to start thinking about if this is something that you can live with. If not, you need to break the ties now. Trust me, if she don't want to give it up, she wont. Not for you or anybody. If you think you can change her you need to think again. Good luck with your decision.
2006-10-14 18:15:40 · answer #7 · answered by bugoff26 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, first of all I think you should sit down with her and talk seriously and tell her what you really think and feel...if not, a nice time apart is always healthy...give her an ultimatium..either she stops or you'll leave...see what happens... Good Luck
2006-10-14 17:53:10 · answer #8 · answered by Ms. Maria 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like she is lying to you and that must be something that you all dont have in common so you might want to rethink your relationship or accept her for the person that she is. You cant change someone.
2006-10-14 17:55:03 · answer #9 · answered by vickielynnperry 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What is the big deal with her wanting to smoke a little pot ?
Lighten up....
2006-10-14 17:54:28 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋