i have been working as a singer for a long time now...it's a good way of making fast cash....also i do it for my kids so i can provide for them as i have been a single mum for 17 years...anyways...tonight i was asked if i would consider working in Spain...a friend has a bar and accommodation for me...and he is offering me double what i earn now, for less hours....thing is....i have 3 sons who are all grown up now, when i mentioned this to my mates they said go for it...the kids are grown...i am single...so why not? thing is i am scared of change, and i love my home, and where i live...i have lots of good friends and would miss being with them...do you think i should just give it a try for 6 months or should i stay here and carry on working my regular gigs...i really am torn between as it's a huge decision to make.,....what do you think...i am leaning towards leaving for a few months...should i or shouldn't i...serious answers would help...i am really stuck on this..should i go for it?
2006-10-14 16:10:58 · 32 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
my main issue is my kids....i would miss them terribly...even though they are young men now, they are still my babies.....i have spoken to them and they say go for it...i am really torn wih this decision, coz i woud love the job, but i dont want to be too far away from them....what do i do?
2006-10-14 16:13:52 · update #1
my friend who offered me the job...i have known him since i was very young... a really good friend...he and his wife just got a bar over there, and they have seen my gigs many times....they know i can grab a crowd, so he's not after anything but business..in return i get a place to stay good wages, and less hours...i know it sounds too good to be true, but i trust this man and his wife with my life....theres nothing sordid about this situation..so i just thought i would add that....my sons are fine about it, they all have jobs here and homes of their own, i would hate to uproot them, i have alot of thinking to do right now but these answers i am getting are pushing me closer and closer to taking the plunge.....
2006-10-14 16:30:32 · update #2
I understand 100% why you want to stay, my daughters only staying at her friends for the night and i miss her already!
But this is a FANTASTIC chance for you. You're so obviously a good mum and they will all miss you. But I think they would feel terribly guilty if you missed this chance just to stay for them.
How would you feel if it was one of them given the chance to go abroad to realise their dream? I'm in no doubt you would miss them every single day. But you wouldn't stop them. You would see them regularly and possibly chat on the internet? The worlds not so big anymore!
I missed my mum all the time when she moved from Kent to Norfolk. But I loved the times when I got to visit. My poor mum moved back after four years to be nearer to us again, only to have me moaning 'Where am I going to go on holiday now?'
:o) I wish you lots & lots of luck. Stop worrying and try and feel less guilty. You deserve this. x
2006-10-14 20:13:44 · answer #1 · answered by becci 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The one question I would ask is, is the friend who offered you the job a person who is not going to 'expect' something extra. If it is truly a friend and this is an opportunity that has found its way to your door, then I would say definitely.."GO..Try it". Your friends will always be where they are now, loving and waiting for you if for some reason it doesn't work out or isn't what you had hoped for. If you don't go, you will always wonder for the rest of your life..'If Only'...how could my life have been different...would I have met someone special there that I would never have met here', etc.,etc.,etc.,
The kids are grown, you are single, if the offer is good..take it. Changes are hard for everyone--but remember- we are always changing, nothing ever stays the same for long! Good luck.
2006-10-14 16:22:38 · answer #2 · answered by Nisey 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
your kids are grown,they are very happy for you,they want you to take a chance and see how it works out.
you don't have to sell everything and take a high gamble,you could ask the kids to look after your place or you could short term lease.you know the bar owners so you will be in good hands.if it doesn't work out you can always come home and pick up your life again.
Spain is only a very short plane ride and there are lots of cheap flights so your kids can come visit,then there's phone,text,e-mail and post so you will always be in connect.
take this opportunity,don't look back and wonder what if???
you have been a wonderful mum,but there has to be a you time,it's not selfish,you have worked hard,you will always be part of there lives,
GO FOR IT!!!!!!!!!!
2006-10-14 17:46:59 · answer #3 · answered by Carrie 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Give it a crack. You can always go home for holidays to visit the kids (we have these marvellous things called planes nowadays, you can get somewhere 365 times as fast as in those old boats). Sorry, I do not mean to belittle this decision, but it sounds as though you are at a point in your life where you are as free of committments as you are ever going to be.
If you can't do it now - when will you be able to? You can always come home as you mentioned. Besides time away will probably make your kids and friends where you presently are appreciate you all the more.
Best of luck.
2006-10-14 17:37:03 · answer #4 · answered by Jumping Mouse 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I would go for it, your sons have their own lives to live and once they settle down with wives and children, then you probably won't see them much, do something for you, that you want to do, you only have one life and you have to live how you want to live it. After all how far is Spain on the plane? - just over 2 hours, thats nothing, you can always nip back home for a few days if you needed to. Just try it, you have nothing to lose, even if you do it for a few months, it would be a way of saving up and if you decided to come home, you will have some money behind you. Good luck and remember be excited and go with the flow and enjoy yourself.
2006-10-14 19:13:37 · answer #5 · answered by radiant 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
This might be a answer to a prayer.You could get 'discovered' in Spain after all your hard work.Change is scary.But you will have one friend (the guy that hired you) besides if you dont go you might reget it for the rest of your life.Change is one thing.Regetting is another.Go for a few months,when you get settled and you decide you love it there,then invite your friends and your kids down some time.,not all at the same time,pay their way down .Cell phones a wondeful thing so is the internet you will stay close with your sons no matter where you are.Go for it.Best of luck!!
2006-10-14 16:19:05 · answer #6 · answered by Joan C 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Try to avoid seeing it as a momentous decision, and then... go for it!
I went to work in Argentina for a year in 1997. I took my then-15 year old daughter with me. It was difficult, but I met the challenges and had some fun too.
A six-month gig is perfect. You can opt to stay an additional time period if everything works out, and if it doesn't that is enough time to get to know the area and try out living in a different world. I think you will enjoy leaving your comfort zone and making new friends too.
Good luck!
2006-10-14 16:15:47 · answer #7 · answered by nora22000 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Honestly cant see your problem, make up your mind to give it a trial run, what have you got to loose? Nothing at all! Your not moving to the other side of the world, its a three hour flight, flights are dirt cheap certainly cheaper than rail fare from London to Scotland!!! I've taken longer than 3 hours to get to work!!
Home sick??? My wife is really into that 'homesick' bit, and we only moved 200 miles away, Daughters living and settled in Spain, Grand kids settled all over UK, she is still homesick!! It drives me potty!!
You can travel to see your family whenever you want, they can see you when ever they want, I cant see any problem, but then I'm a feller, I keep making the mistake of giving women credit for logic!!!!! Fatal error!! What has logic or common sense got to do with 'homesick'????
2006-10-14 18:15:56 · answer #8 · answered by budding author 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Spain is a four hour flight from the UK,so no problem you could always nip back to the UK for a visit. You have done well bringing up children alone.So give it a try for six months as a reward for all the work you did for the kids. Go lady, have some fun.
2006-10-14 17:00:44 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
You should try it out girl, as you say, for 6 months and see whether its what you really wanna do.
I know you're having a dilemma with your kids and missing them etc but as far as they're concerned this is a free holiday ya know? get a cheap flight from easy jet and come over to visit you every other weekend, your friends could do the same!
This might also be able to help you improve on your whole singing career, you never know.
Don't be afraid to attempt new things, its better knowing what happened rather than thinking to yourself later in life "what if?"
2006-10-14 16:34:38 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋