Husbands ex wife, what should i have done?

Question

Husband's ex wife comes in when she is dropping my step daughter off. She then complains that my house is a mess and starts insulting me. I ask her to leave. She keeps tossing insults at me. I ask her to leave again. She stays and continues. Husband passively tells her to leave. She doesn't. All the while throwing insult after insult about me and my children. Finally, I ask her if she wants to take it outside. She tries to keep bad mouthing me. I cut it short with the same question about going outside. She leaves and calls me white trash on the way out. His family now calls me violent and evil. What would most women have done in this situation?

Answer 1

I would of only asked her to leave 1 time - then showed her the door if that didnt work i would walk her out the door and kicked her azz

Answer 2

A few yrs.` ago, I'da slapped the s--t out of her, then thrown her out on her a--. But that would've been WRONG! The best thing u could've done was to leave the room with ur stepdaughter. Gone to ur bedroom, & shut the door, let ur husband handle it, he knows her better & maybe could've had her leave without all the insults. I suspect she's jealous of u & ur house & that's the reason for all the insults. Don't let her get to u, I'll bet her house isn't in any better shape than urs. Don't let ur in-laws bother u either, they're going to believe what they want to, anyway. Good Luck, u're gonna need it.

Answer 3

From now on, insist that she not come in the house when dropping off your step daughter. Get your husband to aggressively agree to this; and meet his ex at the door.

Answer 4

OMG! YOU have the same problem I do!! I have never met anyone that has the same problem! I have dealt with my husbands ex wife for 6 years now, and have raised my step daughter, she constantly comes in when she drops my 7 year old off, I call her mine because ive done all the workpast 6 years, Anyway, I dont however have the problem of her disrespecting me in my home and calling me names, but she comes in and stays and Im just thinking, ok, its time to leave,it just makes it harder on the stepchild, which she has never figured out to this day that its about the daughter, NOT HER! I solved this problem in july finally of this year.I told her from now on to let her walk to and from the vehicle by herself in the driveway and I would come to her off the porch, to say her goodbyes in the car or driveway, this limits any possible situations that could infuriate myself, and take away any discomfort for my stepdaughter.She was furious and got hysterical, even though, She has never been stable in her life or true to her visits, I just let her know, youre on my property which is my residence and you WILL respect me, whether you want to or not, this is still my home.I also then told my husband that he needed to call her and let her be aware that if she doesnt go by this request I will call the law for unlawfully entering my home. He did, and of course she was mad, But...She hasnt done it since, and anytime she calls to say shes on her way, I politely say send her in, Ill be watching for her. I told her that what matters is the comfort of my stepdaughter,that it doesnt matter what SHE feels as long as the child is loved and taken care of. She is doing nothing but hurting the child more by making her feel torn in between and its not fair to the child, She is the most important, and alot of people DONT even take into consideration the feelings of the stepmother,no matter how many sacrifices, no matter how good they are, No matter anything, I have seriously thought about writing to start a new law for stepmothers.I would warn her that if she doesnt start refraining from entering the home,you will be forced to press charges for unlawfully entering the house,and you will take that to court that she is traumatizing the child by her actions, PRESS this, you have to stop this . even if the child is little, then she can meet you at the door after saying her goodbyes, and hand her to you, not even looking at you or speaking.Girl, Im pulling for you, Im there,and know how you feel, I will be thinking of you, and by the way...PAT yourself on the back for being a stepmom and having the courage to deal with this, no one understands until they are in this situation,and shame on them for talking about something they dont know about. Dont let her disrespect and distress your household!!! BEST of luck, honestly from my heart!

Answer 5

After I beat the c*** out of her, I would have laid down the law. It's YOUR house not hers. She shouldn't even be stepping through that door. The fact that your husband didn't step up to her is a little worry some for me too. He needs to let her know that her behavior was way out of line.

Answer 6

Tell her to leave once, after that it is trespass. Call the police and sign a complaint, have her arrested and get a Order of Protection to keep her from running her mouth.

Answer 7

Sorry that happened to you! I know exactly what that feels like except I am hispanic and she was white, she came in told me she could be there with their daughter because my b/f hadn't taken her off the deed after the divorce. I didn't threaten to take her outside because of their daughter and the idea of going to jail and all...however she finally broke us up a couple years later. she died of cancer 8months after we broke up, I still feel bad for the daughter, I don't want her dad anymore. Let it go.....

Answer 8

I don't know, probably the same thing. I wouldn't let her in the house again. Your husband needs to quit being so passive. It's his ex, his family, and should be his problem.

Answer 9

You had every right to make her get out. You needed to just keep the peace for the kids and told her she didnt need to come in your house anymore to drop the kids off and if she need to talk to you about anything to call you, she wasnt wanted in your house anymore.

Answer 10

Called the police, Your daughter must be in a world of hurt to have to deal with her.