Two years ago, I was basically caught cheating with my ex-GF. Our marriage has been very strained since then. Throughout our 5 year marriage, my wife has been in contact often with an ex of hers. They email each other back and forth often, and often "cyber" through email. Some of the emails make it sound like they have a pretty good sexual relationship going. My wife doesn't know that I know about her ex and that I know that they are having sex. The thing is, I almost don't care if she wants to have sex with me and that other guy too, I just want to be able to do the same thing if/when I want to with a girl if I'm attracted and all that good stuff. What should I do?
2006-10-14 13:50:52 · 31 answers · asked by KT 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
well it is obvious that the normal marriage routine is over. you guys need to sit down an talk about an open marriage , where all that is fine to do. of course you need to set the rules between the two of and make it a rule to never talk about the facts. this can still work for the two of you and remain married. who knows it may make you guys closer in the long run!
2006-10-14 14:30:49 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 2⤋
I've heard of these open relationships, but do you know if they really have any chance of lasting, or you may not care about that. What you and your wife have is not a marriage; really. It's some other kind of relationship. I would highly consider divorcing each other and moving on until you find yourselves. You're both doing this, so why not just be friends. Also, I would definitely tell her that I know what she's up to. If she loves you, then she'll stop, you'll stop, and you can begin your marriage. If you don't love each other, then what's the point? It's infidelity at its finest. Good luck with the turn around... you're in for some rough ground; it looks like.
2006-10-14 14:01:19 · answer #2 · answered by me2007 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think of you have lost the meaning of marriage. I dont just mean the better or for worse stuff. I mean wanting to spend the rest of your lives with each other. You are all your wife should need and she is all you should need, so why are you together if that is not happening? If there are no kids in this relationship then I strongly suggest you leave to find someone who will want to be your number one so you can find your number one. It wont get any better and the fact that you dont care that your wife is having sex with someone else tells it all.
2006-10-14 14:15:46 · answer #3 · answered by rightio 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm either really old fashion or this is a crazy world. Please get a divorce...do u know how crazy this question is...its pathetic! Tell her u know what is going on and also about what u have done...and ask her if she wants to go counseling and then ask her if she loves him and tell her how u feel...well basicaly if u two don't love each other then seperate that way u can still do what u want but of course u won't have a wife u can sleep with when u want to!!!!!!!
2006-10-14 14:30:37 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
How pathetic! If u both want to cheat then why not just get a divorce and then u can both do whatever u want to do. Besides, the way things are going, u don't even have a marriage anymore.
2006-10-14 13:57:28 · answer #5 · answered by cheetah7 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You both just need to be adults and get out of this relationship. Hopefully there are no kids involved! Sit down have the discussion, you may just find out that she feels the same way. If the relationship is not getting better and especially when there are other people involved, you just have to ask is this relationship worth saving? Only the two of you can answer that.
2006-10-14 14:44:08 · answer #6 · answered by kcastillo1220 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You both need a divorce because the cheating will keep on going back and forth between you both. Get a divorce and do what you want to do.This marriage isn't healthy at all
2006-10-14 13:53:15 · answer #7 · answered by ♥ Army Wife ♥ 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You don't really have a marriage. What you have is two people incapable of true commitment, living under the same roof and basically going about their own selfish lives. How sad and pathetic.
2006-10-14 14:49:23 · answer #8 · answered by Rachel 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You to mightest well get a divorce and just become sex buddings! Honestly, though you both need to stop because there are disease out there, and don't forget the main one that you can't get rid off. AIDS. You need to talk to your wife, and you two should stop what you are doing if you want to stay together.
2006-10-14 14:01:02 · answer #9 · answered by Heaven 2005 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
There are couples that have "open marriages" - I guess my question to them and to you is, why stay married? Marriage is about honesty and being faithful. If you want to save your marriage you will talk to your wife about her infidelity and get some counseling. You are both playing with fire. It's dishonest and lacks integrity. Live your life with honesty.
2006-10-14 16:22:39 · answer #10 · answered by working mother 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋