problem. im 13, im pregnant?

Question

i had sex with this guy 3 months ago. he got me pregnant. i dont know whether to get a abortion or have it and keep it or have it and put it up 4 adoption

Answer 1

Sweetheart I'm sorry to hear that this has happened to you. We see this a little too much in life today. First let me say that I don't agree with you having sex at the age of 13. But since it has happened and you have gotten pregnant, that can't be changed so you have to move on. By all means do not have an abortion and don't let anyone make you or talk you into having an abortion. It is not right to kill and innocent life. To kill your unborn baby would haunt you the rest of your life. Keep in mind that this baby has a heartbeat and you don't want to be guilty of murder. The reason I can say this is because it happened to me when I was a teenager. I never knew I had a choice to keep my baby. My aunt carried me to have an abortion against my will. I begged her not to but she did it anyway. By me being only 16 at the time, I thought there was nothing I could do but there was. I could have simply said no and stood on it. She couldn't take me screaming and hollering if I had thought about it. I am now a 35 year old woman and having that abortion has haunted me all my life. It really hurts when I think back knowing I let someone kill my unborn child. Pray and ask God to help you to do whats right. God would not be pleased at you killing this baby. Pray that your parents or guardians will support your decision and be there for you. Most of all when you have this baby please love it with all your heart and soul and be the Godly mother that you should be for your baby. Please don't give it up for adoption if you can love this baby the way you are suppose to.

Answer 2

Well, i call a troll here - I mean, come on, Aren't you in school? You couldn't even write this on here since you are in school right now. If not, be ready for a pissed off mom. I don't even know what to say if this is real. Unfortunately for you, your relationship will probably end sooner than later and you will be left with a baby to raise - well actually your mom will and it's not even her baby. I feel sorry for all involved except for you. Even though you are 13, you should have known better. And shame on your mom for even letting you have a boyfriend. It sounds like she has dropped the ball when it comes to raising you. Edit: I want to add (because there seems to be people giving false information), your boyfriend can not be prosecuted unless he is a lot older than you - probably over 18 (although some states have laws like there can't be more than a 4 year age gap). I think you should look into adoption because this should be what's best for the baby, not what you want. What's best is it to go to stable, married parents who are financially able to raise a baby and give it lots of love and attention. You are 13 and can not give any of those things especially since you would be in school and can't even work full time to support the baby.

Answer 3

Honey its your life and only you can make that decision. I will give you a couple of things to think about...abortion a painful physically and mentally resolution to your problem but its physical pain can be gone in a week or so. Mentally it will be there forever. Adoption its painful both physically and mentally but at least you know the child is safe and is wih a good family that you can choose and even have an open adoption where you can visit if and when you want to. Or you can choose to take care of this baby... abeautiful human being in or out of your body who has a right to live just as you and I . A lifetime filled with happiness as well as heartaches. Either way because of your age you have to tell your parents and that the worst of it I know.. I got pregnant at 15 and thats the hardest thing but they may surprise you. (By the way I kept him) And I am glad I did.

Answer 4

wow that brings back memories. i was dating this guy and he raped me and got me pregnant at 13 and i had my daughter at 14. First thing, please dont get an abortion, your only going to be hurting yourself in the long run. if you get an abortion your thoughts on having that kid would run through your mind all the time and youll cry about it a lot to. Second thing do your parents know. Third thing, if you go through with having this baby, give him/her a chance and maybe after a month of keeping him/her and you want to give them up for adoption i would choose an open adoption. that is what i did. an open adoption gives your child to a family close by you that want a kid and during this adoption process you wil lbe able to see him/her on notice, talk to your child, get pictures sent to you, and etc. that would be a really good choice because you get to see your child grow up and still be apart of your childs life.

Answer 5

I feel terrible for you and this may sound harsh but having an abortion will be the best decision you ever made in your LIFE. I dont want to preach to you but please if you must have sex you need to use condoms and probably be on birth control also. There are over 30 STD's actively circulating and the HIV virus and Herpes cannot be cured, so please be aware that the same way you got pregnant you could have gotten an STD. At 13 you cannot take care of a baby. I am not a pro-abortion advocate at all, but in your situation I feel strongly about this. I will keep you in my thoughts, good luck.

Answer 6

I know from working many years in health care , in my state when a girl becomes pregnant, she is considered an adult and can make her own decisions about her health.
I would strongly advise you to seek out a crisis pregnancy center and get help. There are alternative methods to abortions such as adoption or parenting classes that would teach you how to take care of a child yourself.
Remember, you cannot make a selfish decision as this baby is depending on you for it's life. Try to keep things in perspective and realize this isn't the end of the world, and your mother loved you enough you give you a chance at life.

Answer 7

At 13, there is a lot to consider. But the one thing that is for sure is that you are too young to raise a baby. You are only a child yourself. My best advice is that this is an issue that needs to be discussed with your family. I myself would be considering giving the baby up for adoption. There are so many couples out there that would give anything to be parents. If would be the best possible gift that you could give your baby...2 loving parents.
Good luck to you hon!! Just learn from this and wait until you are married this time.

Answer 8

For starters you are too young to deal with the consequences of having unpretected sex and without lecturing you, I must say too young to be having sex at all but whats done is done. We all make mistakes thats how you learn.
Pregnancy is a hard thing to deal with in its self and being a single mom take it from me it is hard to raise kids on your own and I'm sorry to say alot of men aren't ready for the responsibility or just don't care. Also unless you were raped it takes two you can't blame it all on him.
The first thing you need to do is talk to your parents or whoever is responsible for caring for you. I know it is hard to admit to them when we've made a mistake but after the shock and excitement has worn down you may find that they are actually better at dealing then you thought. My personal beliefs are against abortion, a friend of mine had one 8 months ago and they messed it up. She spent two weeks in the hospital and can never have kids again. Not to mention most women never really get over it, they think about it every day or so. I do however believe in adoption there are so many women out there dying to have children but can't and most of them can give your child everything it needs. Most of them are very loving caring people. If I were in your shoes I would think about adoption.
I beg you please think about the consequences of your actions long and hard before you make any decisions. Seek counseling from your family and friends those who love you may be upset but in the end they should turn out to be very supportive and helpful. Remember what you are going through now before deciding to have sex again. It could be worse you could end up with some deadly disease and that would truly destroy your life and the lives of the people who love you the most. I know it is hard being a teenager. I'm in my early twenties and remember what it is like. If you don't learn to make healthy decisions now it won't get easier. I know I still mess things up, I'm pregnant with my second and I lost the baby's father right after I found out so I was facing the same hard decisions you are. I'm sure for you it is a little harder being so young. Finish your education and try to be strong there is always a reason for the things that happen you'll understand it one day. Please take care and don't ever forget there are alot of people that care about you, without knowing you I'm one of them. If you need any other help feel free to contact me babygirl_lil_sis@yahoo.

Answer 9

I feel for you.... I think you need to make the choice if you should abort it or give it up. If you have an abortion it will all be over with fast. If you give it up, you need to think that you will grow an attachment to the baby while it is growing inside of you. It may make it harder for you to make the right choice, but remember you are way too young and have your whole life ahead of you. You don't need a baby. Please be more careful. You are too young to be having sex. You will miss your youth when you get older and regret not living your childhood.

Answer 10

I am sorry that you are faced with this situation. First, is to stop thinking of it as a problem but as the out come of your choice to have sex at your age and without protection. You have to gain from this experience to take responsibility for what you choose to do in this life. Now, you have another choice to make. Does your significant parent know? I suggest you find a counselor to advise you as to what would be the very best in your case.
The problem was your choice to have sex without accounting for the consequences. Whatever you decide to do, please be more responsible in the future with the choices you make. God bless you, honey.