I'm married and have been for years but I find myself daydreaming about another man but its not of a sexual nature. its more about being with this person how I met them reconnected with them hanging out feeling special. is that wrong?
2006-10-14 12:10:54 · 19 answers · asked by cc 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
When you are day dreaming about the opposite sex and it's not about sex,why bother.It sounds to me as if you have a fixation on this man and it may not be sexual now , but the more you think about him the more you will become enamored with him and sex will follow.It is a male -female thing,it's inevitable.
2006-10-14 12:27:22 · answer #1 · answered by Tom S 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
What if the role was reversed? Look at it if your husband was always thinking of another woman. Daydreaming about her when you two are together. I think you know the answer to your question. It is wrong, but you should ask yourself what you are going to do about it. Keep this going OR let it fade away with no contact.
p.s. If you have been married for awhile, I bet this isn't the first time you have had this problem of daydreaming about another man.
2006-10-14 19:25:45 · answer #2 · answered by PuckHead -BH- 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No, it's not really wrong, as long as it stays at the daydreaming stage. However, at this point, it might be hard to keep it there. Don't let it get any deeper. You're asking, so that says it's probably already a concern of yours (any attraction). I don't recommend sharing more than what you already have with this guy, because you're going to set yourself up, and possibly get in deeper than you want, or deeper than you ever thought your could (against your values and morrals). Some of the most Innocent relationships can definitely get out of hand and actually ruin lives. Don't let that happen to you. Keep and appreciate what you already have, and don't even tempt yourself with the possibility of infidelity. Good luck; only you can do this yourself. Take care.
2006-10-14 19:21:32 · answer #3 · answered by me2007 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't know how u could control ur dreams, so I'd say no; it isn't wrong. But what u are feeling is trying to tell u something. It sounds like ur in a rut...u know, married for a while to the same guy, doing the same stuff, chill'in with the kids, work, and just the rigors of life, so u don't get to see the side of ur hubby that made him the one. It seems to me that is what the dream is saying...only, u know what ur hubby gives u...but this past relationship? U might be wondering what might have been. I'd see if ur hubby would be willing to sweep u off ur feet, so he could once again, be the man of ur dreams. As long as u don't ct on ur dreams, it's ok. But please do talk to ur husband before ur seemingly innocent dream...turns into a harsh reality.
2006-10-14 19:15:35 · answer #4 · answered by Uncertain Soul 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
they say when women have affairs it's for emotional reasons and when men do it's for sex. So that sounds like what you're describing.
I think it's perfectly normal, but don't let it get out of hand. Has your hubby been spending less time with you? Maybe you need to try and reconnect with him.
Marriage is hard and you have to WORK at staying in love and connected sometimes.
2006-10-14 19:14:45 · answer #5 · answered by who-wants-to-know 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
to me yes. especially if hes a real person. if he made a move on you it would go from sneaking out for a coffee together to a matinee sometime etc...basically it'd be sexual really quickly.
I'm really sorry for you that's happening. maybe you should quit cheating in your mind and focus to something else. especially if you have kids at home.
if you cant tell your husband about it, then maybe you haven't shared that intimacy with him. sounds like your relationship at home needs work. try opening up and embarrassing yourself a bit. or ask him embarrassing questions to open up the floor to keep it all copacetic.
2006-10-14 19:17:24 · answer #6 · answered by jorluke 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You seek attention from your husband and you're not getting it; you are fantastizing about another man because you feel your husband is disappointing you and not giving you everything you want. You seek compassion, support, and just someone to talk to. Reconnect with your hubby.
2006-10-14 21:55:57 · answer #7 · answered by Rachel 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
there it is ... that feeling of being special
you can give that to your husband
because it takes two to make a marriage succeed.
love isn't just what you receive
it's also what you give.
now a question .. has your mind brought up this guy as a way of showing you your marriage is drifting or is it because you really want to head for the exit?
2006-10-14 19:21:06 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
MRSPATPAT79 doesn't have a clue as to what life is..don't take advice from her. Maybe she should go back to school before she starts giving advice to people.
I don't believe your feelings are wrong! You are a good person to look at those feelings and ask for advice. Good for you!
2006-10-14 21:17:53 · answer #9 · answered by justwonderingwhatever 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Girl I've been there and I'm still there, Everybody day dreams, but mine is more of a reality, I don't think it's wrong to day dream cause what your doing is not gonna harm anyone, unless you are acting upon it.
2006-10-14 19:23:46 · answer #10 · answered by Windy 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋