me and my childs father have been dating for 5 1/2 yr.We wanted a baby together and we had one she's 2 months old.Well he treated me bad during my pregancy and a little afterwards.Well he says sorry and has been apologizing for a while now.I always thought it was a bunch of bullsh*t!Well we had a nasty arguement last weekend and i mean bad.I told him to go away and never come back.Well he calls this morning and says sorry about everything,the way he treated me and all and he says that he still loves me and has feeling for me.He admits he was wrong and wants us to be cool.He says before we get married he wants to be finacially stable and get all his childish ways out.He says the only reason we arent married b/c he's not ready and he doesnt want to be married like that.I can tell he's sorry and it seems like he's changing he hasnt done any wrong in the last month or so.I never thought he still felt that way about me he seemed that he'd moved on.Ive started casually dating what do I do??
2006-10-14 10:14:14 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Newborn & Baby
he asked me to go out on a family outting?what do I do?Ive tried to move on b/c I thought he had.
2006-10-14 10:15:08 · update #1
I knwo how you feel I have been there and am. My son is 5 months 1 week and my husband left right before I found out I was pregnant and then later we got back together and then right before I had him while my husband was almost out of basic training for the army he left again to go back to his ex. He says he is sorry nd loves me and wants to be with me and I do love him but I have also moved on and it is the hardest feeling in the world because I love him so much but I am so scared he will do it again but you never know unless you try because you will always wonder "WHAT IF" so I rather try and get hurt to then never know plus you have a child involved and if there is a chance he can have both parents and be happy. Also who cares what anyone else thinks it is what you think. My family hates my husband for what he has done but my mom always tells me it is my marriage my choice and only I can make that choice. If you belive he is sorry and you love him then give him a second chance. Because everyone deserves a second chance. For you family and for you if you love him then try again.
2006-10-14 11:32:19 · answer #1 · answered by cuteswim_gurl 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do not risk your emotional welfare just because he says he's sorry. I was in a very abusive relationship when I was pregnant with my son, and then he said he was sorry, and that he would change. I believed him, and married him when I was 7 months pregnant. He only got worse, and I had to divorce him after only 11 months of marriage with a 9 month old baby, and nowhere to go. Move on! You will be happy you did. Don't feel guilty for not having the father in your life. It just means you get the chance to meet a wonderful man while your daughter is still young, and can grow up with the man you will marry in the future. Good luck, and I hope you don't cave to his "sorrys" anymore. Be strong!
2006-10-14 10:25:44 · answer #2 · answered by Caelan's mom 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
After analyzing your post I right this moment theory how immature your better half (ex) sounds. you're greater advantageous off devoid of him have self belief me. you're able to do greater advantageous than that. this could be between the happiest cases of your existence and rather you're being positioned by way of an emotional rollercoaster which isn't straightforward (on the two one in all you). Being under pressure at this degree of the being pregnant isn't sturdy for you or the toddler. If he became a good guy he could be helping you one hundred% and he's no longer doing that, rather he's doing the different and putting unneccesary tension on you. He sounds very selfish and looks like he's no longer waiting for this toddler. a intense high quality and worrying guy could by no ability inform you which you had to pass decrease back to artwork 4 weeks after the beginning, that's purely ridiculous. i do no longer understand the place you're yet here in Australia there is one in all those undertaking as parenting value and family contributors earnings. I truthfully have 2 babies elderly 2 and 3 and am getting almost $500 each and every week. I truthfully have worked my total existence and then as quickly as I had our little ones (i became 30 on the time) i desperate to take 5 years of artwork to enhance them because of the fact i do no longer prefer anybody else elevating them. My better half by no ability questioned me as quickly as. the terrific undertaking you're able to do is attempt and forget with regard to the father of your toddler on the 2d (purely tell him that that's over and which you will see him on the beginning and then communicate visitation rights after that) after which you would be able to easily relish your being pregnant devoid of any tension. sturdy luck. (playstation : whilst he says you're a foul vile person.. purely respond with 'what you spot in others you spot in your self')
2016-10-02 07:27:39 · answer #3 · answered by bradberry 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Family outting wont hurt but only for the childs sake. Try to remain friends. Then if later down the road he proves himself to you, that he will treat you right and love you unconditionally then try to work things out, but I believe you have to be able to be friends before you can be lovers. 5 1/2 years is a long time to spend with someone to just give it completely up, but it took me and my husband 4 years before we could get along and be friends and realize how much we loved each other, we have now been married for 3 years. I wish you the best of luck and things will work out one way or the other.
2006-10-14 10:47:20 · answer #4 · answered by Erica 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It wouldnt hurt to give it one more try since he is your baby's daddy and he never has hit you or cheated on you. Maybe go to the family thing and see how he treats you with his family. But if he gives you any trouble just walk away.
Maybe he is just scared to get married. I have been with my fiance for almost 3 years and im 38 weeks preg. we dont have a date set to get married.
Also i look at not being married in a positive way, if you had a fight you could just walk away and get some air and try to work it out if your married and do that everyone talks and its a huge deal.
2006-10-14 10:23:06 · answer #5 · answered by mellow_26241 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you have moved on, then keep moving. Don't let him keep calling the shots by deciding when he wants to be nice to you. Accept his apology for be a horses *** before (it's the right thing to do) but don't disrespect yourself by getting sucked back into a relationship with him. You will have to deal with him as the father of your child and there's nothing you can do about that. It doesn't have to go any further than that. I assume he's going to be financially responsible for this child regardless of how your relationship turns out?
2006-10-14 12:46:06 · answer #6 · answered by Georgia Girl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he didn't want to get married then WHY did he have sex? I suggest that you show him the door and tell him to keep on walking, then find a lawyer and file for child support. He doesn't want to get married because he doesn't want to be responsible. If he wasn't financially stable enough for a family before you had sex and created another life then he shouldn't have sex to begin with.
2006-10-14 13:24:26 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
He sounds too childish to get back together with him. I would tell him that he can come by to visit his child, but otherwise you don't want a relationship with him. It sounds like you have moved on and he should too. There is no reason for you to go to his family outings either.
2006-10-14 10:21:17 · answer #8 · answered by prettycoloredrocks 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You had a baby with a man who doesn't want to get married and he's not financially stable and still has childish ways? What is wrong with you? He will never marry you. Be smart enough to file for child support. He will always have an excuse to fight with you and not pay for his child.
2006-10-14 10:18:34 · answer #9 · answered by notyou311 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I would file in court to get him to pay child support. He sounds like he needs lots of time to grow up. Tell him that you won't take him back for now, that he has to prove he's serious about you and the baby. Then he should prove he's ready by paying child support, seeing the baby often, going to pediatric appointments with you and the baby, being available and supportive of you.
2006-10-14 10:23:16 · answer #10 · answered by nimo22 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋