My husband has said that he's not going to stop doing what he likes to do just because we have a brand new baby. I feel that now we have a baby our lives should be modified and adjusted so that we do things together as a family. I don't like alwayse being the one to stay home while he goes on hunting , fishing and skiing trips and tries to justify going on each one. He needs to make some sacrifies as well.
2006-10-14 06:12:07 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Have you seen Brokeback Mountain?
Its out on DVD now.
2006-10-14 06:14:16 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
so why do you have to stay home all the time? there are such things as baby sitters. ask a Friend or a family member to keep an eye on the baby, even if its once a week. just go do something that you enjoy./ sure it would be great if he realized that things are different now, but it is obvious he does not. i think that this should have been something you talked about before deciding to have a child. but because it wasn't, you now need to deal with whats going on. he knows that he can come and go when he wants and you will be sitting there when he gets home. maybe if you stopped doing that he will be more willing to work with you. maybe its time for the two of you to get away for the weekend. ask someone that you feel comfortable with watching your baby and the two of you take a weekend and go some place. take the time to enjoy each other. it sounds to me that's what the both of you need, maybe he is feeling a little left out now that the baby is here. and he is getting the attention he needs by going and hanging with his friends.
2006-10-14 13:50:32 · answer #2 · answered by here to help 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, while I think that it is important for new parents to still do things that they enjoy doing, it takes two people to make a baby and if there are 2 parents, then both parents should be equally involved in raising and caring for the baby. It definitely takes commitment and sacrifice and I think compromise is key. Talk to your hubby and tell him that he can still do some of the things that he likes to do while you stay home with baby, but then he needs to agree to stay home with baby so that you can get out of the house and do something you enjoy as well. As a stay at home mom, I know that if you go too long without getting out of the house to be with friends, or get a massage or go to the mall or even take a long nap without having to worry about the little one, you start to feel kinda zombie-ish and not human. Work out a plan where you both get time away individually, time together with baby as a family and also, time together without baby---very important!! Hubby will have to learn that he can still do stuff, just not every single time he wants and not just him. You will be a much healthier, happier mom if he gives you time to yourself too. Hope it all works out!!! Good luck and congratulations!!
2006-10-14 13:24:26 · answer #3 · answered by luvbabysky 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Why don't you go out with your friends while he's out with his. Get a babysitter. The number of trips that is acceptable has to be agreed upon by you and your husband. A new baby is a bit young for going out and doing things as a family. I'll bet as the baby gets older dad will be more receptive of doing family things.
2006-10-14 13:18:04 · answer #4 · answered by BetteBoop 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sigh, another hunting ques. Looks to me that ol' hubby is really getting over on you, kid. A real man accepts the responsibility of fatherhood. A real man doesn't leave the mom home and take little vacations for himself. A real man thinks of his love first, not himself. A real man is willing to make ANY sacrifice necessary to care for his family. A real man will get up during the night and feed junior so she can get some rest, which she needs badly. A real man will gladly share some tasks like changing diapers, cleaning up messes, things that are not easy. Is that what you have, hon, a real man? (show him this) .... Rat a.r.m.
2006-10-14 13:28:18 · answer #5 · answered by Raptor 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You guys should not have gotten married in the first place. If your husband is that immature to think it's ok to stick you with the "bad" part of marriage; when he's off enjoying himself the whole time; I'd say look for a way out now; it's just gonna get worse. I have friends who do the guys week-end thing (married guys); and it's not always good! Not that everyone is that way... but from the "tone" of your letter; I suspect that yours' is?
2006-10-14 13:17:17 · answer #6 · answered by bettiewoeswoes 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
And rather than discussing this with your husband, you think a bunch of strangers will help you form an opinion that will work for you and yours?
I think you have a real problem there already.
2006-10-14 13:15:53 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You're very true,I'm not telling you to divorce him but think about this,What if the shoe was on the other foot and you were always out with your girls.I think he would have some major problems with that.
2006-10-14 13:14:45 · answer #8 · answered by DiamondXxx 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Say that to him say that he should have taken some responsibility when you both decided to have/keep a baby and it's unfair on you. Xx
2006-10-14 13:27:41 · answer #9 · answered by Ellis 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋