My girl freind cheated on me early this year. We broke up but i decided to give her a second chance. Problem is i keep having visuals of when she cheated and i get so upset when i think of it, its affecting our relationship coz i dont trust her at times. I really love this girl, we have been together for 3 years and i wanted to marry her, but things are not the same in my heart. Should i stay or let her go?
2006-10-14 05:56:36 · 18 answers · asked by frankie 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Trust understanding and respect are the foundations of a strong relationship.
If she cheated then she doesn't respect you.
If you can't trust her then that's trust out the window too,
If there is understanding then she will love you enough to let you go; you are trapped emotionally and you are the prisoner you can break free but you'll always have the shackles around your feet unless she lets you go.
Tell her you want to break it off and see what happens; if she loves you, trusts you and understands you she will let you go and you will be free.
If she clings to you and begs you not to go then those shackles shall forever be around your feet een if you walk away.
[Or she could just not give a sh** an let you go]
2006-10-14 07:34:25 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Trust is the key in a relationship. Marriage contract is a sacramental bond built on honesty, trust and dedication. These thoughts are on your mind and will always be there until it is placed on the table and handled. There is much work between the two of you that need to be ironed out. You may love her but betrayal is so very hard to deal with. Three years is a long time with someone, you have the comfort, you have the companionship, you have all those little wonderful things that come with a relationship. But you have no trust. Even if its at times. I'm sure you gave her a second chance because you do love her. Have you stopped to think if its real love or just the fact that you like the idea of being in love? Have you admitted you feelings to her about this? Has she realized what she has done? Because of her cheating on you, you lost a big part of what holds a relationship together. Forever (in marriage) is a long time to be with someone. You need to really figure out if you can handle the betrayal she did unto you. If you bottle it in, it will eat away at you and you may begin to feel resentment.
2006-10-14 06:35:37 · answer #2 · answered by jovy 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if u wanna be with someone for the rest of your life, you have to learn to trust them otherwise u wont have a happy life together if u keep on having them visuals. Maybe you should just have a break from her and try to find a girl that is more trustworthy than her so u don't have to do all that worrying. Then, if u really think there is no one better than her, then go back to her and just learn to trust her.
2006-10-14 06:01:04 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you should let her go becasue there are doubts in your heart. If you can't trust her now imagine in the long run if you do marry. If you do decide to stay with her the wound will heal, but it will leave a scar indicating that you will never fully recover from her cheating.
2006-10-14 12:39:57 · answer #4 · answered by melivaga2004 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Im a be honest i cheated on my boyfriend a year ago and i know he feels the same as you do. The way i feel is if you love her stay with her and let her try to earn your trust back.
2006-10-14 05:58:50 · answer #5 · answered by trufolife04 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you want to feel this way for a while - then stick with her... because I guarantee you- you will not trust her for a looooong time. It's because she didn't prove herself trustworthy. If you think it's enough feeling this way already after one year- then move on.... but remember- this can happen again with somebody else.... it's how you deal with it when it happens that will make you smile later on and proud of yourself for having tried to work it out..... because one day you guys will trust each other again. Read books on this topic. There's one called: surviving infidelity.
2006-10-14 06:09:46 · answer #6 · answered by justmemimi 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There has to be a reason why she cheated. Find out why before you go any further.
If you're dead set on staying with her, then go ahead. You can probably still work things out. Ask her how she feels, and make sure she still wants to stay with you.
2006-10-14 06:34:26 · answer #7 · answered by Hannah 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
wthing5- WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU? Quit being an *ssh*le! This guy has a legitimate problem here. Help him! Calling him a tw*t isn't going to help. Get bent d*ckhe*d!
To answer the question.....
you forgave her, let it go man. If you weren't ready, then you shouldn't have taken her back yet. Best wishes for you!
2006-10-14 06:38:58 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
well,first thing is that trust,when its there its there completly,theres nothing such as sometimes and other times...so basically you have lost trust which is very normal after what she did to you...i suggest you guys should part ways and move on with life cos theres no point being with someone whom you cant trust cos trust isthe foundation of every relationship and when trust starts shaking you need to reconsider!!good luck!!
2006-10-14 06:06:08 · answer #9 · answered by country_girl 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No human mind is clean.We should think of our sins first.Forgive her.Pray to GOD for that and marry her coz Marriage is a blessed and beautiful relation approved by GOD.
2006-10-14 06:00:48 · answer #10 · answered by malcom 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋