what should i do. My ex just told me she has a new girlfriend.?

Question

i spoke to my ex girlfriend today for the first time in ages and she felt she had to tell me before someone else did that she has a new girlfriend.
i started crying almost straight away, but i told her that as long as she was happy then thats fine and if she ever needs me as a friend to talk to i'll be there waiting for her.
feel like absolute crap now. we have been broken up for almost 6months but when ever we did talk since then she gave me the feeling we would get back together at the end of the year after her studies are over. I'm so torn. i'm glad shes happy yet i'm angry but i can't act angry about it as i feel i have no right to. What should i do?

Please try and be kind with your answers as i'm still really upset

the thing is i thought i already had moved on and then bam i feel like crap again

the thing is i thought i already had moved on and then bam i feel like crap again

Answer 1

I am going thru this right now myself. Plus, the other night I was talking with a friend who lost the great love of her life. We came to the conclusion that the people who tell you to get over it or move on has never really experience that deep soul mate kind of love. This is different from your ordinary relationship. The emotional hurt in this kind of breakup can be devastating. I have known people who need years to recover and never fully do. One woman told me not a day goes by that she doesn't think of her ex. I hope in time that the ex's look back on their life and realize how luckey they were to be loved this way. All I can offer is to act like to are and that time eases the pain. Hang in there and know that you are not the only one going thru this emotional devistation.

Answer 2

You have answered you own question about what you should do. You told her you would be there is she ever needed any one to talk to. I also feel that she made up her mind some time ago to break off the relationship. It’s not always easy letting go. However, since some time has past since you two were a couple I would have to say, “it will not take you that long to mend your broken heart.” I have no doubt, that deep down inside, you already felt she was going to find some one else anyway.
The good new is, that there is all ways someone else in this world to meet and what ups and downs you had together may help you build a better relationship with your next girlfriend. Good luck with your search and I feel that broken relationship helps you build for a better relationship in the future.

Answer 3

Sometimes we take longer to grieve and get over things, don't be so hard on yourself.

If she was giving you the message that it was not over, you need to reexamine that and see is that was real or simply wishful thinking on your part. Again, forgive yourself for the wishful thinking if its true.

She doesn't love you any more, and that relationship is over. Simple as that. What you have to do now is REALLY move on, which you had not done before. Avoid them, don't contact her, or talk to her, and forget about that friend in need crap, you don't need to be her support when you love her and she's in love with someone else.

Get involved with something you are interested and passionate about and throw yourself into full force. Distract yourself every time you think about her, break patterns that remind you of her, and just move on, day by day, minute by minute.

Its fricken hard, and hurts like a b**ch, but you have to love yourself more than you love the pain. One day you will get up and not think about her, and that will bring you peace.

Good luck to you and be strong.

Answer 4

Damm girl i feel you !!
i think you should be the bigger and better person and do what you told her and be there for her when she needs you and if you love her then i think you should back off cause all you going to do is make you're self more sad and angry so keep you're distance if ya was or still in love oh and if she told you she needs to be more into her studies why do she have a new girlfriend ?? you need to see whats good with that ...well cant think of nothing else
good luck and i hope everything work's out for you !!!!!!!!

Answer 5

there really is nothing you can do my friend. as hard as it is, it's been 6 months and in those 6 months she decided that she didn't want to get back together, this is what you should accept. you have to move on as best you can. the only cure is time and distraction. do lots of things that keep you busy and productive, don't sink into despair. there are other girls out there. it may not seem like it now, but eventually, you will meet others you would like to be in a relationship with. good luck!!

Answer 6

Here is a very important lesson in life that I give you for free..it may sound harsh, but it really is not.
WE make our own emotions, it is our chemicals that make us feel what we feel...no one does it to us, for us, or with us. IT is ONLY "WE" who do this. Therefore, WE are in total control of how we feel at any one moment. YOU can choose to feel like crap or move through life with positive energy and accomplish great things, have great relationships, and love living. IT is up to you only. You say you are happy for her, then MEAN IT through and through. Let that happiness rid you of the jealousy and bad feelings. IT is easy to feel sorry for ourselves, but it accomplishes nothing. Pity Parties are cheap to produce, but they are events that no one wants to come to. Therefore, as of NOW, turn off the chemicals, do not let your mind go to that 'Park" and play, for that is exactly what you are doing...playing in a mine field. Stop now, start feeling good about yourself, and you will look back on this with humor. In her attempt to ease your feelings, she accidentally gave you hope..I am sorry this happened, but it did. Know that no one wanted to hurt you intentionally, but it happens in life. You will hurt others by accident. Look forward, not backwards, and your life will be much greater than it is today. Good luck, and I mean that. I have been there, survived with a greater understanding of myself.

Answer 7

Shes ur ex so move on.Get a guy have sum kids and leave a normal life.Worrying about the past doesnt help.wats done is done.

Answer 8

She is obviously not worth your time. I learned this the hard way with one of my exes, I bounced back in forth with being wih him. Now I realize he was not worth my time.

Answer 9

you just have to let go and move on. i know it hurts, i'm in something similiar myself. its very difficult. know if it's meant to be it will.

Answer 10

hunni, you are so pretty, i guess you'll find your super woman really soon, take care of that marvellous blonde hair. love.