We've been broken up for about 2 weeks now, today would be our 8 month anniversary if we were still together. And right now, i feel like crying, still every morning that i wake up, he's the first person i think of, and the first person i want to call. We're supposed to be friends, or whatever and it's working, but it's hard. the other day, he texted me telling me he missed me, making me think maybe something good would come of things, but nothing happened. i know we'll be together in the future, we've established that. But at this moment, every part of me wants to send something to him about today, being it's the anniversary.. but is that bad? should i be strong and let him come to me?
2006-10-14 02:46:08 · 22 answers · asked by April Lynn 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
From my point of view, I would wait to see what he does. Try to stay busy and not think about it too hard. Yes I know this will be hard. Stay busy doing things you like doing for yourself. So that even if you don't hear from him you have not sat at home all day waiting to hear from him or upsetting yourself about everything.
Take a walk. Take a long bath. Talk to your friends. Go to a museum. Maybe take yourself out to dinner.
Ask your friends to be with you today and do things with you with the understanding that if he contacts you that you may go see him.
I can give you all the advice in the world but you have to decide what is right for you. Just try not to obsess about it all day
Good luck
2006-10-14 02:57:04 · answer #1 · answered by pj_gal 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Heartbreak is never ever bad. Please don't feel guilty because of what you are feeling. You are terribly heartbroken, and if I must say, a little confused.
It is very hard to remain "friends and intouch" when there has been a breakup. I think the text message was a bad thing at this point, for it only aggravates your feelings of loss and grief. And being the anniversary only makes it harder.
I am just wondering why you have broken up now, when you have established that you will be together in the future.
That sounds confusing, to me. Maybe you have good reasons.
I am sorry you are going through this. Grief is natural and necessary. You mention "we are supposed to be friends or whatever". I am wondering if he made that statement. A lot of guys get confused in relationships. They want to be "in" the relationship but often feel a little scared and, rather than just let go, they say things like "just be friends".
It's very complex and I do feel for you.
If you both have to have this time of separation, I would advise him NOT to text message you because it only hurts and confuses you.
You need to grieve and get on with your life while you have this separation. More importantly,you need to heal.
I am hoping this is what you want and that it DOES work out good
for the both of you. Cry all you have to, because crying does heal the pain of a broken heart.
2006-10-14 09:58:06 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Deciding to separate is a very painful thing.... He know's it is 8 months too.. If you know that now is not the time and later would be better, let it go for now... A relationship burrows into your heart and there is alot of emotion attached to it, so to forget about it overnght is impossible... But don't put yourself throught the grinder on every anniversary date.
The breakup is new and of course painful, but it will ease with time. I wouldn't be texting alot or talkiing alot , because that will only get your hopes up and your ego couldn't take too many shut-downs , after you realize there is not going to be a reconciliation....
You both need a little space... he is hurting too,, but remember if you chose to go separate ways now, it was for a good reason...
Don't try to mend something that has to heal on it's own.. Time will tell if it is meant to be.....
2006-10-14 09:53:58 · answer #3 · answered by doclakewrite 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You are a strong person cuz you are a women. Just hang in there. Things will get better. Trust me I have been there. You will be ok. Just be strong. Every day will get easier and you will notive that after a month or so.
Good Luck
2006-10-14 09:50:02 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Be strong, Have a good time and the less you think about him the more likely he'll show up and ready to move on with what you and him had. Good luck.
2006-10-14 09:49:27 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Take it easy. Live today, find something that distracts you today. Try to smile. This pain is normal, but you might find things can be great with just you!
I've felt all those things too, I think everyone has.
2006-10-14 09:49:20 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
No. You need some healing. Talk to him, he is ashamed that he let a girl like you go and now he misses you. He's sorry he hurt you and I bet he thinks that you want nothing to do with him. Talk to him.
2006-10-14 09:48:51 · answer #7 · answered by dropdeadchicken28 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
It's natural to feel the way you feel, but if you've already established you won't be together then stop torturing yourself. Be strong...you can do it.
2006-10-14 09:48:54 · answer #8 · answered by __Shele 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
in order to be back together,u two must be contacting each other to let him know that u ares till missing him..just tell him..it will be ok
2006-10-14 09:49:23 · answer #9 · answered by ♣valentine melons♣ 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Yes, you should wait for him. Men want a challenge and you shouldn't throw yourself at him. I know it's hard but your instincts are right.
2006-10-14 09:49:16 · answer #10 · answered by lizardmama 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋